life is sucking write now not really but kinda in a tiny way...
so hmm i have had the worst luck with electronic devices lately.. it is safe to say that i am bad luck yesterday i accidentally deleted my entire life away ( my buddy list ) had like 300 now thanks to some people i have like 100. it sucks bad tell me about it still in fucking shock. then today to top it off and to make things all better i fucking broke my damn tv no sound is coming out of it and i am sure that is not healthy for it cause if no sound comes out of it then it stays inside so when it eventually get fixed not by me by the way it will be extremly loud. so i have found my self sitting here with nothing to do at all except for stare and the damn walls. woo hoo hell of a time i gona have with my self. it leaves me with alot of time to think and i dont want to do that i am tired of thinking cause all that leads to is painfull tears that dont go away. ya sure there the internet but there is only so much time till you run outta things to do and then to top it off your bum starts to get cramps/hurt do to the fact that you have been sitting on it for god knows how many hours. but oh well i guess i can learn how to twiddle my thumbs fastly or somethigng. i duno what i would do with out my lovely aida shes kept me sane for today/everyday so far lol. =) thanks mucho. so i found myself replaying the song "diffrent" by Acceptance i duno i just love that song havnt quiet figure out if it means its about me i duno. i am officially even more hurt by my dad it sucks i im'd him last night and he usually ims me right back did he nope... he was on the phone with one of the girls hes dating and told me that he would talk to me later.... =( wtf is that shit im his fucking daughter i come first so he suposivly says.. ya whatever fuck you to is all i have to say. and its great me and my mother have come to relize how much of an ass he really is. he doesnt think that i am going to make it up here. and he knows i wont make it down there hints why i moved. but he thinks that i wont be able to live anywhere or be able to move on with my life with out him in it. wrong answer can do and will do.im sorry if it kills you to finally see me happy. i duno anymore so ive been talking to my uncle alot lately not that its bad but in all truth i wish i woulda kept in close contact like i do now. it deff woulda been alot easier i duno. ive found myself wanting the feeling of being happy like not that i am now ccause i am but not that kinda happy like love have or lust whatever it sounds stupid but havnt you noticed that when anybodys in lust/"love" that they are soo happy and nothing brings them down and they just glow well ya havnt had that for awhile and when i did get it i moved and now it just hurts. i duno but any who have updated enough for today i suppose i am gona hit the beach and see how the it is out there. and ill talk to you kiddo's later.
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