Fic: A Real Treat
Title: A Real Treat
Pairing: Kirk/Chekov (I slash that poor bb too much)
Rating: PG-13 for pretty darn lewd conduct (mainly language) and mentions of pornography
Summary: Pavel recognized Captain Kirk from somewhere...but where might it be? Inspired by this prompt from the kink meme. Sequel is here.
The first hurried mission is so frantic that Pavel ignores the niggling voice in his mind, the voice that says "I know that guy from somewhere." He doesn't have time for half-remembered faces, and anyway, of course he probably knows Cadet Kirk, they've been living in the same place for three years and going to many of the same classes.
He shakes these thoughts temporarily, but then the Enterprise is approved for its five-year mission, with Kirk as captain and Pavel as a Navigations Officer. He has time to reflect.
More importantly, he has time to rewatch some of his porn stash, and then it hits him like a ton of bricks.
Jimmy Treat, a blond boytoy who fucks and gets fucked eight ways from Sunday in more films of dubious repute than Pavel can count on all his fingers and toes is James Tiberius Kirk.
Pavel is not known for being subtle. It is too difficult to bother with in a foreign language, the third he's learned in his still-short life. But he knows his face is brilliantly suited for acting innocent, and that is almost as good. So when Kirk asks him one day how he likes his job, Pavel turns to look him in the eyes, in the middle of his shift on the Bridge, and grins as he says, "It's a real treat to be vorking under you, sir." Pavel calls Kirk "Keptin" to the exclusion of everything else. Most people use "sir" because it's shorter, but Pavel has found that using "sir" sparingly, and with just the right expression, can make people squirm in ways that amuse him for days after.
It helps that there is a similar scene in Commander Takes Control, with a young Jimmy Treat telling his superior officer "I love working under you, sir." This is not subtle, or it isn't to Kirk, anyway, but the rest of the crew, unless they've seen the porno, will not catch on. And even if they have seen it, no one would believe innocent little Ensign Pavel Chekov would be so perverse as to watch such filthy smut.
Kirk, though, doesn't miss a trick. He shifts at the address and smiles a little weakly. Pavel knows the PADD he moves to his lap is meant to hide an erection. At the end of the next shift, Kirk calls out to him absently and they walk to the captain's quarters together, managing to work almost fifty lines from bad pornos into conversation. It is possible more than fifty were used, Kirk said a few things that struck him as slightly odd. He wonders if Kirk is better versed in porn than he is, and decides the captain must be.
"So, mister, you seem to be something of a connoisseur," Kirk said teasingly when the doors closed behind him.
"There is more American porn than Russian," Pavel says, "because Russians would rather have sex with real people. Unfortunately, real people don't typically like having sex with a kid prodigy more than six years younger than them."
Kirk nods, sympathetic. "Well, as long as your knowledge, and anything we do with that knowledge, won't be used to blackmail me, then I won't have to tell your mother about the massive collection of gay porn, up to and including hardcore BDSM, suggested pedophilia, and bestiality, I confiscated from your closet."
Pavel gapes.
"Like in old times, mister - mutually assured destruction."
On to Part Two?
Pairing: Kirk/Chekov (I slash that poor bb too much)
Rating: PG-13 for pretty darn lewd conduct (mainly language) and mentions of pornography
Summary: Pavel recognized Captain Kirk from somewhere...but where might it be? Inspired by this prompt from the kink meme. Sequel is here.
The first hurried mission is so frantic that Pavel ignores the niggling voice in his mind, the voice that says "I know that guy from somewhere." He doesn't have time for half-remembered faces, and anyway, of course he probably knows Cadet Kirk, they've been living in the same place for three years and going to many of the same classes.
He shakes these thoughts temporarily, but then the Enterprise is approved for its five-year mission, with Kirk as captain and Pavel as a Navigations Officer. He has time to reflect.
More importantly, he has time to rewatch some of his porn stash, and then it hits him like a ton of bricks.
Jimmy Treat, a blond boytoy who fucks and gets fucked eight ways from Sunday in more films of dubious repute than Pavel can count on all his fingers and toes is James Tiberius Kirk.
Pavel is not known for being subtle. It is too difficult to bother with in a foreign language, the third he's learned in his still-short life. But he knows his face is brilliantly suited for acting innocent, and that is almost as good. So when Kirk asks him one day how he likes his job, Pavel turns to look him in the eyes, in the middle of his shift on the Bridge, and grins as he says, "It's a real treat to be vorking under you, sir." Pavel calls Kirk "Keptin" to the exclusion of everything else. Most people use "sir" because it's shorter, but Pavel has found that using "sir" sparingly, and with just the right expression, can make people squirm in ways that amuse him for days after.
It helps that there is a similar scene in Commander Takes Control, with a young Jimmy Treat telling his superior officer "I love working under you, sir." This is not subtle, or it isn't to Kirk, anyway, but the rest of the crew, unless they've seen the porno, will not catch on. And even if they have seen it, no one would believe innocent little Ensign Pavel Chekov would be so perverse as to watch such filthy smut.
Kirk, though, doesn't miss a trick. He shifts at the address and smiles a little weakly. Pavel knows the PADD he moves to his lap is meant to hide an erection. At the end of the next shift, Kirk calls out to him absently and they walk to the captain's quarters together, managing to work almost fifty lines from bad pornos into conversation. It is possible more than fifty were used, Kirk said a few things that struck him as slightly odd. He wonders if Kirk is better versed in porn than he is, and decides the captain must be.
"So, mister, you seem to be something of a connoisseur," Kirk said teasingly when the doors closed behind him.
"There is more American porn than Russian," Pavel says, "because Russians would rather have sex with real people. Unfortunately, real people don't typically like having sex with a kid prodigy more than six years younger than them."
Kirk nods, sympathetic. "Well, as long as your knowledge, and anything we do with that knowledge, won't be used to blackmail me, then I won't have to tell your mother about the massive collection of gay porn, up to and including hardcore BDSM, suggested pedophilia, and bestiality, I confiscated from your closet."
Pavel gapes.
"Like in old times, mister - mutually assured destruction."
On to Part Two?