Obviously, because I'm demented and know where this is going, I love this. Hate Coheed and Cambria, but that's a really fitting choice.\o/
"...parts of her brain, the bits that knew how to do rational thinking, were left on the floor of the woods, stuck to a rock and decomposing slowly in the shadows."
Because I'm a sucker for visuals. :D Really do *love* the way you write.
You're a genius though. Should say this is one of my favorites.
Massive thanks. Sorry for the lack of whatever in this comment. You sorta fried my brain for a bit.
Haha, don't worry - everyone else I know hates Coheed. But it's suiting this fic, I think, so I'm okay with it :)
Glad you're still liking it - is it all still believable, like character wise? Tell me if not, as I have no-one to beta (or no beta? How do you say it? IDEK.) and I'll change any bits that need changing!
Don't worry this chapter fried my mind a bit too... In a totally 'I heart Katie' way, though.
Think it fits quite well, even though that guys voice makes me wanna kick him in the...:D
No, it's still completely believable. Cause really, Katie wouldn't be sensitive enough to have a clue what's going on emotionally. Naomi's still caught up in the 'Yay me. I love Emily and figured my shit out.' idea, so she shouldn't be totally aware either. Jesus, poor Emily though.
The pacing is still perfect, and its got just the right levels of description without getting boring or repetitive.
Yes, you did manage to extend the masochism this direction in a totally 'I heart Katie' way. Had my head a bit to muddled to make a proper comment.
(Think it'd be no beta. Make people into better nouns, yeah? :) I'd help, but I'm not completely sure what they do. Plus, nobody should trust my grammar skills.
Okay, good stuff! You've got completely how I see Katie and Naomi at the moment, so that's working!
Effy... well. I guess you'll just have to wait and see with Effy. I kind of think that because she's not actually a heartless bitch that, after the initial panic, and Freddie forgave her and blah, that she'd want to apologise to Katie.
After Effy was honest with Freddie about her feelings for him, I kind of see her as trying to be more honest and get things back on track. She didn't want to keep running away with Cook, and the only way for her to sort things out would be to make amends at home.
Not that, like, I've thought extensively about this or anything :p
Don't think shes heartless really, just sorta selfish. She seemed pretty upset by the whole thing. Dunno though; they really did shit to develop her character. There's not even much to go on.
I think she'd try to apologize, but if she was ignored she would move on quickly. Her whole destructive personality makes her seem a bit too self-involved to actively try and fix things beyond a certain point, even if she is aware of the issue.
Your going for a changed and renewed Effy though? So it's no problem then, just create pivotal evidence, or whatever. 'Cause the running away bit didn't show any proof that she cared to, or was going to change. They made that all about the god awful love triangle instead.
Shit development...so depressing. Great for you though. You get to fix it, AND will get the much deserved credit. :D
I agree - I think Effy before now would have gone 'fuck it'. She did pretty much hate Katie... but, you know, maybe the love of a good man (or Freddie) has sorted her out ;)
Don't worry, there'll be some explaining for Effy to do. Which will be fun, cos she basically doesn't say anything much, ever.
I'm going to take into account what you said whilst writing, though. Hopefully it will help me to create a more accurate Effy :)
Everyone in this story, I think, has had a bit of time to grow, or at least think about it. They're all changing, which is quite exciting. As long as it stays mostly realistic then I think it'll be fine.
"...parts of her brain, the bits that knew how to do rational thinking, were left on the floor of the woods, stuck to a rock and decomposing slowly in the shadows."
Because I'm a sucker for visuals. :D
Really do *love* the way you write.
You're a genius though. Should say this is one of my favorites.
Massive thanks.
Sorry for the lack of whatever in this comment. You sorta fried my brain for a bit.
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Glad you're still liking it - is it all still believable, like character wise? Tell me if not, as I have no-one to beta (or no beta? How do you say it? IDEK.) and I'll change any bits that need changing!
Don't worry this chapter fried my mind a bit too... In a totally 'I heart Katie' way, though.
Cheers dude!
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No, it's still completely believable. Cause really, Katie wouldn't be sensitive enough to have a clue what's going on emotionally. Naomi's still caught up in the 'Yay me. I love Emily and figured my shit out.' idea, so she shouldn't be totally aware either.
Jesus, poor Emily though.
The pacing is still perfect, and its got just the right levels of description without getting boring or repetitive.
Yes, you did manage to extend the masochism this direction in a totally 'I heart Katie' way.
Had my head a bit to muddled to make a proper comment.
(Think it'd be no beta. Make people into better nouns, yeah? :)
I'd help, but I'm not completely sure what they do. Plus, nobody should trust my grammar skills.
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Would she even care enough to keep attempting an apology after the initial try?
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Effy... well. I guess you'll just have to wait and see with Effy. I kind of think that because she's not actually a heartless bitch that, after the initial panic, and Freddie forgave her and blah, that she'd want to apologise to Katie.
After Effy was honest with Freddie about her feelings for him, I kind of see her as trying to be more honest and get things back on track. She didn't want to keep running away with Cook, and the only way for her to sort things out would be to make amends at home.
Not that, like, I've thought extensively about this or anything :p
What do you think?
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Dunno though; they really did shit to develop her character. There's not even much to go on.
I think she'd try to apologize, but if she was ignored she would move on quickly. Her whole destructive personality makes her seem a bit too self-involved to actively try and fix things beyond a certain point, even if she is aware of the issue.
Your going for a changed and renewed Effy though?
So it's no problem then, just create pivotal evidence, or whatever.
'Cause the running away bit didn't show any proof that she cared to, or was going to change.
They made that all about the god awful love triangle instead.
Shit development...so depressing.
Great for you though. You get to fix it, AND will get the much deserved credit. :D
Hmm, haven't thought on it much either. :P
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Don't worry, there'll be some explaining for Effy to do. Which will be fun, cos she basically doesn't say anything much, ever.
I'm going to take into account what you said whilst writing, though. Hopefully it will help me to create a more accurate Effy :)
Everyone in this story, I think, has had a bit of time to grow, or at least think about it. They're all changing, which is quite exciting. As long as it stays mostly realistic then I think it'll be fine.
Thanks for your thoughts - love times a billion.
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