I'll take THE RAPIST for 400
Personal freedom and identity are a huge part of who I am. My wariness of authority and conformity is reflexive, not affected; I don't think about rebellion, it just really happens. People either disagree with my methods, feel threatened by my blithe confidence, or believe that any deviation from the mode is anathema. Whatever the reason, the end result is usually the same, and I'm often turned out on my feet to find greener pastures where independent thought is accepted (and if I'm lucky, celebrated).
That doesn't happen very often, but I don't let it get me down. I've grown used to the misconceptions and the tinpot dictatorships, and I expect most people to decide to take what I say in the absolute worst way. When narrow belligerence and censorship are the norm, you really appreciate the few people who do take you on your word, and that's what happened to me. Other than my parents (who I still strangely desire to please), the opinions of most people don't account for much; in fact, if I listened to people as much as I was expected to, I would never have become a teacher. I'd have never had the courage to buck the norm and briefly defy my parents by finally doing what brought me happiness, instead of bringing them money. No job on the market strikes me as even remotely as satisfying as arming the minds of tomorrow with the tools of independent thought, and the knowledge that the crowded path isn't the only path.
This ideology is so deeply ingrained that I've even noticed its prevalence in my story themes and my roleplay. I don't mean any of this fandom roleplay nonsense, either; I've discovered fandom roleplay to be too restricted and monitored to get away with anything beyond simple satisfaction, and there is nothing intrinsically wrong with that, it just means that fandom roleplay isn't what I'm referring to. On tabletop and in purely original mediums, my most explored archetype is the Outsider, whether that means an outsider in the Socratic way, or an outsider in the Byronic way. I have strong examples of both on my shelf, and various other ones that rest between the two flavours. They are count amongst my most memorable characters, as well: Gennosuke & Sasuke Randov (BGC), Toritaka Yoshiki (L5R), and Eberict Silverleaf (WoW).
(This likely means nothing to any of you so far, but that's okay. Also WoW is a horrible example of a 'non-restrictive' medium, but I somehow managed to get quite a lot from the character, so he's included.)
Time to go into why I'm even thinking about this. First is because I keep getting a lot of flak for being different or having a different opinion from the norm, even amongst people who really ought to be more enlightened than that. Can't change human nature. Second has to do with some disturbing stories my WoW network decided to spring on me about how things are going on ol' Shadow Council. An old friend of mine has been playing a sting operation (both ICly and OOCly) on a psych major who plays two characters. One is a kindly and goofy character, designed to be non-threatening and ineffectual; this was his main roleplaying character, and what many people associate him with. Cue his second character, a hypno-therapist that coerces the females of the guild into sessions that degenerate quickly into mind-control cyber-sex. This trick doesn't only work once, but twice, and even continues on until certain members of the guild are on VOIP playing out the scenes with him in private. The present situation has this guy with a large harem of girls that keep going back to him, and an even larger (and growing) faction of those who feel wronged by this chain of unsavoury deeds.
"Eberict is the only one capable of ending this." That's what I was told today, twice, by two different people relating the events to me, and they meant the phrase to be both IC and OOC in nature. Only Eberict, out of every one of them still there, and after a year of me basically having fucked off from Warcraft. Only Eberict can stop this. My first thought? "Dear God, not this crap again." Mind control and sex plot? Not the first time it has happened, not by far, but I guess that's why they thought of me: I used Eberict to stand up against two similar cases, and was immediately vilified for it. Took an unpopular position (why it is unpopular is beyond me), and became hated... and loved by the people who so loathed me. I never understood how it happened, but it generated a cult of personality around the character, something I have never seen before and will likely never see again. A cult of personality, I should add, that has survived my absence.
The point is that, however manipulated or in the wrong these people were (after the sour endings of my first intervention, I became flooded with apologies and heartfelt thanks from the original victims who had begun to realise just how taken advantage of they were) they chose to attack the dissenting opinion, and they've chosen to do the same again to every voice brave enough to ring where mine once did. I will never understand why people do that, and I doubt I will ever stop seeing it. This isn't just limited to hypno-theRAPIST cyber sex on ventrillo, though. Since becoming involved in the LJ community again, I more or less see that sort of behaviour daily, and find it incredibly irksome. The difference is that sex-victims at least apologise for calling you a douche bag after the fact.
Why do people make bad decisions like this, and justify it through numbers and 'sameness'? Why do people see a different opinion and immediately label it as hostile? Look beyond my example and ask that question. Think of all the times you've talked about an unrelated statistic and were labeled a homophobe by someone and their sycophant posse for something that never had anything to do with homosexuality in the first place. Think about every instance you've been blamed by an unthinking mob for the wrongdoings of ancestors that weren't even yours just because you had a certain skin-tone or genitalia. Think about all of that and ask yourself, "Why do we do this?" And, while you're at it, think about this:
Why is being different so wrong? It isn't, but why do so many people believe it is?
That's all I wanted to tl;dr for today. For the short version, you can really just skip past this.
That doesn't happen very often, but I don't let it get me down. I've grown used to the misconceptions and the tinpot dictatorships, and I expect most people to decide to take what I say in the absolute worst way. When narrow belligerence and censorship are the norm, you really appreciate the few people who do take you on your word, and that's what happened to me. Other than my parents (who I still strangely desire to please), the opinions of most people don't account for much; in fact, if I listened to people as much as I was expected to, I would never have become a teacher. I'd have never had the courage to buck the norm and briefly defy my parents by finally doing what brought me happiness, instead of bringing them money. No job on the market strikes me as even remotely as satisfying as arming the minds of tomorrow with the tools of independent thought, and the knowledge that the crowded path isn't the only path.
This ideology is so deeply ingrained that I've even noticed its prevalence in my story themes and my roleplay. I don't mean any of this fandom roleplay nonsense, either; I've discovered fandom roleplay to be too restricted and monitored to get away with anything beyond simple satisfaction, and there is nothing intrinsically wrong with that, it just means that fandom roleplay isn't what I'm referring to. On tabletop and in purely original mediums, my most explored archetype is the Outsider, whether that means an outsider in the Socratic way, or an outsider in the Byronic way. I have strong examples of both on my shelf, and various other ones that rest between the two flavours. They are count amongst my most memorable characters, as well: Gennosuke & Sasuke Randov (BGC), Toritaka Yoshiki (L5R), and Eberict Silverleaf (WoW).
(This likely means nothing to any of you so far, but that's okay. Also WoW is a horrible example of a 'non-restrictive' medium, but I somehow managed to get quite a lot from the character, so he's included.)
Time to go into why I'm even thinking about this. First is because I keep getting a lot of flak for being different or having a different opinion from the norm, even amongst people who really ought to be more enlightened than that. Can't change human nature. Second has to do with some disturbing stories my WoW network decided to spring on me about how things are going on ol' Shadow Council. An old friend of mine has been playing a sting operation (both ICly and OOCly) on a psych major who plays two characters. One is a kindly and goofy character, designed to be non-threatening and ineffectual; this was his main roleplaying character, and what many people associate him with. Cue his second character, a hypno-therapist that coerces the females of the guild into sessions that degenerate quickly into mind-control cyber-sex. This trick doesn't only work once, but twice, and even continues on until certain members of the guild are on VOIP playing out the scenes with him in private. The present situation has this guy with a large harem of girls that keep going back to him, and an even larger (and growing) faction of those who feel wronged by this chain of unsavoury deeds.
"Eberict is the only one capable of ending this." That's what I was told today, twice, by two different people relating the events to me, and they meant the phrase to be both IC and OOC in nature. Only Eberict, out of every one of them still there, and after a year of me basically having fucked off from Warcraft. Only Eberict can stop this. My first thought? "Dear God, not this crap again." Mind control and sex plot? Not the first time it has happened, not by far, but I guess that's why they thought of me: I used Eberict to stand up against two similar cases, and was immediately vilified for it. Took an unpopular position (why it is unpopular is beyond me), and became hated... and loved by the people who so loathed me. I never understood how it happened, but it generated a cult of personality around the character, something I have never seen before and will likely never see again. A cult of personality, I should add, that has survived my absence.
The point is that, however manipulated or in the wrong these people were (after the sour endings of my first intervention, I became flooded with apologies and heartfelt thanks from the original victims who had begun to realise just how taken advantage of they were) they chose to attack the dissenting opinion, and they've chosen to do the same again to every voice brave enough to ring where mine once did. I will never understand why people do that, and I doubt I will ever stop seeing it. This isn't just limited to hypno-theRAPIST cyber sex on ventrillo, though. Since becoming involved in the LJ community again, I more or less see that sort of behaviour daily, and find it incredibly irksome. The difference is that sex-victims at least apologise for calling you a douche bag after the fact.
Why do people make bad decisions like this, and justify it through numbers and 'sameness'? Why do people see a different opinion and immediately label it as hostile? Look beyond my example and ask that question. Think of all the times you've talked about an unrelated statistic and were labeled a homophobe by someone and their sycophant posse for something that never had anything to do with homosexuality in the first place. Think about every instance you've been blamed by an unthinking mob for the wrongdoings of ancestors that weren't even yours just because you had a certain skin-tone or genitalia. Think about all of that and ask yourself, "Why do we do this?" And, while you're at it, think about this:
Why is being different so wrong? It isn't, but why do so many people believe it is?
That's all I wanted to tl;dr for today. For the short version, you can really just skip past this.