Hey
Long time no update...but o well. I've kinda been unable to. That's ok though. Well I can't wait for tomorrow. I get to LORRP!!! For those of you who don't know what that is tough cookies. That's what I'm doin and its gonna be off the chain!!! I'm like super hyper. The Parrotts just left and like I was just talkin to myself and just actin like a complete fool and then...ummm...yea...and it was great. I don't feel like I've slept in a while, but it feels good!!! Iono...I'm just really hyper. Me and Reg are singing for Open Mic nite at church. I wish I were excited, but I'm not confident in my voice. That's like the one thing I'm scared to let ppl hear that and what I write(poem and song wise) But hey maybe some day I'll get to where I don't care. That'll be good times!!! Ppl tell me that I have a beautiful voice, but I hate my voice b/c it reminds me so much of my mom. She had a beautiful voice. I loved to hear her sing. To hear her strong voice just float over me as a fell off to sleep. My voice is kinda like a painful reminder of what I can't have. That her voice will never reach my ears again. Gosh I miss her so much. I just want her to come home. I want her to love me. Great my hyper mood is gone. I hate this. I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! Why did she have to leave??? Why does she have to gamble with her life everyday??? Why can't she just love me the way I want her to??? Why??? It hurts so bad. I remind me of her so much it hurts to look in the mirror. It hurts to sing. It hurts to laugh. It hurts to be me. How can I be so much like someone I've only seen and been around a couple of times? Iono...I quit. Good-bye
Jess
Jess