There is no lonelier face--than lying in this bed
Lindsey:: I walked into the house the same as every other day, we ate dinner together and I finished up some reports on the computer and then went into the bathroom and took my suit off and looked in the mirror at the scars and cuts that were covering my chest, my fingers running over a newer one as I let out a sigh and stepped into the shower. Once finished I put on a pair or shorts and then took the long walk up to the attic, it seemed that the stairs went on forever, it was agonizing, knowing what was coming, but there was nothing I could do to stop it. "Hello Eve." I say as I open the door and walk in, my heart sinking at the sight of her and her instruments.
Eve: I smile sweetly and walk over to kiss you. "Hey there. How was your day?" I ask as I take your hand and lead you over to a chair.
Lindsey: I follow your lead and sit at the chair and put my hands on the arms as you strap them in. "Work was great, Eve." I replied, it was established that everything ended with your name; it was a way to make me remember who was doing this to me. Not that I could ever forget, the woman I loved...tortured me every day.
Eve: I clamp the restraints down hard, tugging the leather so it digs into your arms. "Good, I know you're going to be great. Wolfram and Hart is lucky to have you," I say with an eerily genuine smile as I walk over to the table. I put one fingertip in my mouth and suck on it gently, trying to decide what to use first.
Lindsey: My eyes are locked on yours as I can tell you enjoy this, why wouldn't you? I'm a bad person, I've done a lot of bad things...why should my death ease my suffering? Common misconception with people that death eases suffering...I guess it's easier to cope with that way.
Eve: I pick up a curved, double edged dagger and walk over to you casually. "So, any big cases I should know about?" I ask as if nothing is wrong as I slide the tip over your collar bone, the skin splitting easily under the razor sharp metal.
Lindsey: I wince in pain, "I was working with a client who demanded to have 7 virgins, that was incredibly hard to find in Los Angeles; " I say as if nothing is wrong. "It could have been worse though, Eve."
Eve: I laugh softly and run my fingertip over the cut knowing the salt from my fingers will make it sting like hell. "Were you able to find them? And how could it be worse baby?" I ask with a concerned look as I make a matching cut along your other collar bone.
Lindsey: I bite by bottom lip to keep from screaming, I know this game. We play it all too often. "Of course, Eve. My name in Lindsey McDonald. I always get the job done. It could have been 17 virgins, I would have had to start taking younger kids, Eve."
Eve: I giggle and lean over to kiss you, 'accidentally' pressing the blade against your stomach, sliding it into the soft tissue a couple of inches. "Oops," I say with a wicked giggle, covering my mouth like a school girl even as I pull the hilt and slice up to the bottom of your sternum.
Lindsey: I bite my bottom lip hard enough to draw blood to muffle the scream after the kiss. I look up at you, pain, anger, and anguish in my eyes. Why you? Of all the people I could be tortured by...why you? The one person I cared about.
Eve: "Mmm, such a lovely scream," I say with a smile, closing my eyes to concentrate on it, wanting to hear it as much as possible. I pull the dagger out of your stomach and wipe it on your pants before returning it to the table. "Anything else interesting in your day baby?"
Lindsey: "Angel was being a pain in the ass as usual." I say taking a few deep breathes as I try to catch my breathe. "That was about it today, Eve." I repeat.
Eve: "He is quite tedious, isn't he?" I ask with a chuckle. "I think he's still pissed that you got your hand back," I tease, picking up a pair of alligator clamps.
Lindsey: "Something like that, he's got his panties all up in a bunch, Eve." I say as I wince as you pick up the clamps.
Eve: "He probably just wants to get you in bed," I tease as I take the clamps and attach them across your hand, the metal teeth digging hard into your palms and the backs of your hands. I hum softly to myself as I walk over and pull a small basin of water near your feet. "Why don't I wash your feet for you, I know it's been a long day."
Lindsey: I'm used to the clamps, the electricity is what gets me. I put my feet up and then put them into the bucket of water, my body automatically starting to convulse, because I'm so used to it. "Yes Eve, please do."
Eve: "Oh don't be such a baby, it's not that cold," I say with a smile, leaning down to gently massage your feet in the water. "See, isn't that better?" I ask as I stand and walk over to the table, drying my hands off then flipping a switch on the wall to cause the electricity to flow through you, interested in how the water will effect it.
Lindsey: My entire body lifts form the chair the only thing keeping me on it is the straps on my arms as I convulse as you turn the electricity off, I start panting for air, my entire body on fire, everything burns, and you laugh and flip the switch again, the pain shooting through my body again.
So here we are, I find myself in hell again. Funny how that works; you are born, live a pretty sorry life, join a law firm, piss the wrong people off, end up in hell, come back for a bit, die, and then back to hell. Of course in between were some pretty big events, the main one being that Angel cut my hand off and of course I got a possessed piece of shit in return. Bastard-if I had my way with him, I’d cut something of his off.
Of course I’m not bitter, I knew it was coming. I was dealing with a vampire, the shit he tells people, “Oh, but I’ve got a soul, I’m a good guy now. I just work for the evil law firm.” Load of bull shit. I’ve seen the darker side of Angel, hell I’ve read files on the horrible things he did to people and he tells me I’m evil, what a hypocrite. He’s the one-upper, whatever you do; he’s done something bigger and better. You spare little kids lives and he says he does that daily or something like that. Damn narcissist if you ask me, I mean seriously-how does he keep his hair like that? That’s a lot of gel if you ask me; since he can’t see himself in a mirror he must spend a lot of time perfecting it. I don’t think I’ve ever actually seen it move; maybe it’s an entity upon itself.
Looking back I realize now that things could have been different, they should have been different I worked my ass off to get out of my house and lead a better life. I just screwed up when I joined Wolfram and Hart, but now…it’s my time. It’s destiny-I couldn’t have wished for a better time to extract my revenge against Angel and his dorky friends who were constantly getting in my way; making look back. Oh how sweet revenge is…and best served on ice.
“Cruor ut cruor EGO voco thee , Cruor ut Cruor reverto volo. Audite illa lacuna , audite meus vox. Phasmatis ex ceterus pars. EGO adeo mihi , EGO voco thee Crux crucis iam valde tribuo.” Eve continues to chant as she looks around waiting for him to show up. “Damn it!” She shouts and then resumes in English this time, “Blood to blood I summon thee, Blood to Blood return to me. Hear these words, hear my cry. Spirit from the other side. I come to me, I summon thee. Cross now the great divide.” Eve opened her eyes again and looked around the empty room. She decided it was time for a human sacrifice to make up for the life she wanted back, she’d make a switch.
Lindsey: I find myself in a new room, standing up, I look around quickly, too fast as I see Eve, sitting in a circle, I think I can hear her voice. This is new, this doesn't happen, I got teleported or something. I collapse onto the floor with a loud thud.
Eve: I jump up and away from the bloody bowl in front of me, wiping my hands on my black pants as I rush over to you. "Lindsey, oh god, Lindsey!" I say softly, worried, as I kneel down beside you, gasping as I see the blood covering your chest.
Lindsey: I look up at you and try to move away, you've got blood on your hands. "Why? This isn't how it's supposed to be...what are you doing, Eve?"
Eve: "I know, I'm sorry, but I had to get you back," I say, trying to calm my own emotions as you're very obviously hurt pretty badly. "We can talk about it later, don't move, I'll get some bandages, or or or something," I say, feeling frantic. I can't lose you after I just got you back.
Lindsey: I wait until you leave and scoot closer to the wall, "It's not supposed to be like this...why is today different?" I ask looking up at the ceiling, expecting an answer from someone who doesn't exist. "Why is she pretending to care? Isn't it bad enough she's the one doing this?"
Eve: I rummage through the bathroom, throwing things out of drawers and cabinets until I have a make shift first aid kit of towels, gauze, butterfly bandages and tape as well as band-aids, though I'm not sure how much good they'll do. I grab a bottle of peroxide for good measure and then run back into the room where you are and frown as I see you huddled against a wall. I slow down and approach you more calmly, I need to focus on taking care of you, not freaking out. "I've got some stuff, let me help," I say softly as I take one of the soft towels and start wiping off the worst of the blood.
Lindsey: I finally find my strength, this is all wrong. I grip your hand tight as I hold it away from me, forcing you to drop the towel. "Stop it, Eve!" I say angrily as I get up and push you away from me. "This isn't how it works...you don't get to mess with my head anymore, the physical stuff I can take. Don't pretend to care Eve, don't insult me, Eve."
Eve: I gasp as you grab my wrist hard, wincing in pain. "I don't know what you're talking about, baby, please, let me help you, you're in shock or something."
Lindsey: I look at your face, studying it for a moment before I realize that something happened. "Fuck...I'm sorry Eve." I say as I move and wrap my arms around you, pulling you to me and getting blood on your clothes as I cup your face and look into your eyes. "Is it really you? Is it over? Did I already die in hell?" Obviously there's no heaven in my cards, but this could be some new layer of hell.
Eve: "It's really me, I've been trying for months to get you back. I'm sorry, so so sorry it took me so long," I say, finally letting the tears I've been holding back well up in my eyes. "You're not dead, you're alive again."
Lindsey: I look at you confused; stranger things have happened so it is quite possible that this is real. "Oh...ok, thanks." I say as I kiss you softly holding you tight against me; even if this is a new hell, I want to at least have a moment of happiness.
Eve: I wrap my arms tightly around you and kiss you back, forcing myself not to press too deep. "You're going to be okay, I promise," I say as I lay my head on your chest, not caring that your blood is clinging to me.
Lindsey: "God, I've missed you so much Eve." I say looking into your eyes as I kiss you again, I can't believe this is happening.
Eve: I return the kiss passionately, I had doubted I could do it but I had to try. It's all worth it for just this moment. "I've missed you so much, I thought I was going to die without you here with me," I say, running my hands over your back. "Come on, I need to get you cleaned up, see if you need a doctor or something."
Lindsey: "I'll be ok; I don't think I can die, well I probably could, but it wouldn't be the first, or the second time." I say shrugging my shoulders but letting you clean up my wounds.
Eve: "Well, it will make me feel useful, at least," I say softly as I concentrate on being as gentle as I can as I clean the wounds. Only the one in your stomach looks very bad, the others are fairly shallow, mostly likely meant for pain, not damage. I shake my head. "Who did this to you? The fucking Senior Partners sent you to some kind of torture hell?" I ask, more angry than I'm letting on.
Lindsey: I look down at my hands, the clamp marks still on the back of them, "Something like that, same hell dimension different day." I say softly, "Well more like same day different hell dimension."
Eve: "This happened to you every day??" I ask, my jaw literally dropping. "Oh god, I'm sorry, I should have tried harder, I just couldn't... I couldn't kill someone right away, I'm sorry," I admit as I fasten several butterfly band-aids across your collar bones.
Lindsey: I cup your face when you finish putting gauze and tape over my stomach and force you to look at me, it takes me a while to finally look into your eyes, but once I do I stay locked on them. "It's ok, I got used to it, it only hurt like hell the first month, now it just hurts." I say with a chuckle, "I really just want some sleep though."
Eve: I can't help but chuckle and lean in to kiss you. "Come on, you know where my bed is," I say as I look back into your eyes. "We've got all the time in the world now, right?"
So this is where are now, laying in bed, Eve’s asleep, her breathing is even and she’s even got a smile, I wish I could see what she was dreaming, me? I’m too scared to sleep, scared that I’ll wake up and she won’t be here, and that this was all just a dream and I’ll wake up and have to start the day over again and she’ll torture me again. I’m not ready to lose Eve again, even if that means never sleeping.
I want you to remember
A love so full it could send us all ways
I want you to surrender
All my feelings rose today