(no subject)
having doubt is strange... pausing.. thinking twice.. feeling differently another time around. doubting myself makes me uncomfortable.. but doubt is also fuel... to keep me going.. to see what happens.
having faith is important for me.. right now. not giving up... believing that things will be better.. that we will all overcome our problems. that we will keep on and keep living. I worry too much, I realize.. over things I cannot control.. as much as these things pain me, I don't own them, I don't control them. but I also realize that I am not helpless.. that I can control some things.. like myself.. I'm working on so many things right now.. self-projects, or something. completely unorganized and missing pieces... but worth working on... I need help but I don't know what kind of help. maybe I need it from myself... maybe it's inside and I just haven't found it. I think I am hiding inside some version of myself, while I work things out... but it's like I'm taking too long... I'm losing touch with everyone around me. I've never felt like this before. I've never felt this lack of self-control.
where did I trip?
having faith is important for me.. right now. not giving up... believing that things will be better.. that we will all overcome our problems. that we will keep on and keep living. I worry too much, I realize.. over things I cannot control.. as much as these things pain me, I don't own them, I don't control them. but I also realize that I am not helpless.. that I can control some things.. like myself.. I'm working on so many things right now.. self-projects, or something. completely unorganized and missing pieces... but worth working on... I need help but I don't know what kind of help. maybe I need it from myself... maybe it's inside and I just haven't found it. I think I am hiding inside some version of myself, while I work things out... but it's like I'm taking too long... I'm losing touch with everyone around me. I've never felt like this before. I've never felt this lack of self-control.
where did I trip?