[FFXIII] Puzzle Pieces
A/N: Pretty new to this side of the fandom (FFXIII that is) and well, I feel inspired these few days (and I have yet to see the ending of the game, so tone down the spoilers :D) and it’s all about my favorite OTP in FF, HopexLight (SEE EVEN THE NAME! it’s like you can’t have hope when there’s no light, and no light means no hope-OMO IT FITS!) *ahem* sets that aside/ well, hopefully I did a good job on portraying them… let’s see if I can get Hope’s character right.
Title: Puzzle Pieces
Pairing: Hope/Lightning
Summary: After the little scene on the edges of Yaschas Massif with Vanille, Lightning seems colder than ever to oblivious Hope. And because understanding why Lightning was mad in the first place was something Hope couldn’t figure on his own, Snow and Sazh decided to give the poor kid advice from their aged and experienced minds.
NOTE: (05/21/10) small revisions had been made :D
Puzzle Pieces
{LxH}
“Move!”
“L-Light!”
She doesn’t answer; the whole group already jumping down the cliff, leaving me confused as to why Lightning was acting so distant. Okay, well sure she is basically distant to everyone, but… I thought, what we had was different-I mean, uh… I mean, after all that time in the Vile Peaks and through Gapra Whitewood-something must have changed after that. Of course, Hope… build yourself up for a long fall.
“Hurry up kid, Sis is serious-she will leave you behind if you don’t pick up the slack,” Snow said before jumping down the cliff. What else could I do, wander around here thinking about WHY all of the sudden Lightning refuses to talk to me? Actually…
“Hope!!” I nearly fell off the cliff, when I heard her shout my name with an eerie reminiscent of our talk before Odin. You’re a liability, I can’t have that happening-I’m stronger now and besides, “I promised to keep her safe too.” And perfect landing; I looked up, searching for the quick (but still) smile that only appears before me. for me.
“What are you expecting a ‘good job’? Are you a pet now, let’s go.” Ouch.
“Light…” another cold shoulder. What the hell did I do?! Can’t she just tell me, I’d like to go up to her…okay, scratch that, I can’t go up to her when she’s already pissed like hell. I’d be next in line to the death list after Snow-if it’s Light’s D-list-I’m happy being ignored thank you very much.
--- --- --- ---- “Aww… why so glum, you want to go check out more of Gran Pulse with me, I’m sure that would brighten up your mood!” always the bright and bubbly; sometimes I can’t help but compare her to Lightning. Vanille is bright as the sun itself, while Lightning is… Lightning is as mysterious and beautiful as the view of Cocoon from Pulse; sure Cocoon can’t compare to Pulse, but when it comes right down to it… I’d rather go back to Cocoon, L’Cie or not L’Cie.
Same with Lightning; I forced a smile, “I’m fine, winded that’s all. I’ll take five-“
“B-but…” she sighs; I was holding my breath-it’s either she’d force me, or just leave me alone for a few minutes than force me again. “Alright, Fang!” Of course.
“Well, well, if it isn’t Mr. darkcloud ruining a day in hell-“
“Sazh, what did I tell you about calling Gran Pulse-“
He laughs a small level of fear present in the tone. Sazh sat beside me, Chocobo immediately flying near my face as if another ‘what’s wrong?’ person. I guess they’re all worried… well not all, there’s just… “I see. So it’s a woman problem that’s got you down. I’ve got to say Hope, for a kid to turn soldier in a few days, this is disappointing.” He chuckles, and I find the banter a little comforting.
I wonder what gave it off? Was it the uncontrollable staring, the moments where I’d cherish calling her ‘Light’ and not ‘Lightning’, or that I’m not behind her everywhere now. It wasn't my entire being’s fault that my eyes are attracted to her, no, that’s like blaming gravity for falling objects-it’s only natural.
“What…heh, nevermind.”
He snickers, “If you’re wondering what gave it away, it’s that stare of yours.” Chocobo flies back to him, kweh-ing about things I’d never find the time to think things through now, “Right you are chocobo! It’s that whole aura of yours! It just screams ‘lost puppy’, I mean chocobo here’s a chick but it can hold out without me or Dajh every now and then.”
“He~~eey, wha’cha guys talking about, I just got back with Lightning-“I just heard her name and instantly my eyes darted for the person’s voice, “…what’s with the needy look there, Hope?”
“Girl troubles.” Sazh simplified.
I heard a very, VERY stifled ‘pfft’ and snicker coming from Snow. Well I could have what guessed the ‘pfft’ for, but WHY exactly are they laughing-it’s not funny. I’d like to see him try to go a whole day with Serah cold shouldering him, and we’ll see what’s so funny. “Whoa-whoa, there goes your look again. Going to murder me now that Lightning’s gone?”
“Shut up.”
He snickers, “Easy, easy. I have nothing against what you feel kid, but damn. Lightning of all the women in the world…” I know, I know it’s an impossibility… it’s a stagger rate of 999.99%... but it’s just how it should be. How Lightning is, there is nothing about her that looked imperfect. That’s why I wanted to follow her, I wanted to be strong like her, and as I grew up by her side, the longer I watched and stood behind being guarded by her powerful stance… the more I wanted to protect and save her. “…Oh… boy, this can’t be happening. Are you serious here Hope?”
“What? I haven’t said anything!”
“You… love her, don’t you?”
My throat dries and the feeling of throwing up was near. I was hearing a couple of hysterical laughter and some thumping on the wood we sat on, but for the life of me I couldn’t manage to clear the words out of my mind. I know I want to protect Lightning, to save her, but does that mean…
“… that I… I… love,” I gulped, “her?” they exchanged looks and laughed again; I have yet to see what’s so funny about this. “Guys, c’mon. I need some wisdom from experience.”
Snow takes a deep breath, composing himself and punching his right fist to his open left hand, “What do you need?” Sazh nodded; “We’ll do our best, so shoot.”
“Well first, Lightning’s been really… uhm…”
“Mean.”
“Cold.”
“Nasty.”
I gave them a slight glare, “No, no and definitely no! Just… she’s being distant, lately…and I don’t know why. Does she seem different to you guys lately?”
They both shake their heads.
“Same solider girl as before,” Sazh commented.
“Eh… Lightning hasn’t really warmed up to me yet.” That’s because you’re marrying her sister, Snow really, sometimes I wonder what Serah saw in you.
“That’s odd… before-“
Sazh interrupted, “We know, you’re like the only living being on earth besides her Eidolon, and Serah that stuck to her and still ended up fine. I sure remember trying so hard to run after soldier girl at the Hanging Edge, good times… er, bad times… I’m not really sure.” He chuckles playing with chocobo chick again.
“That’s not it. Light was, I still hope she is, someone I could run to. She knows when I try to do my best, and when I try it just because she said to… I never complained as long as it’s her asking me to do something crazy, I know... whatever Light said must have a meaning to it… somewhere.” But right now, why can’t I. Why can’t I be the one that knows what’s wrong, did I do something wrong? Didn’t I watch her back well enough? “What the hell did I do!?”
“Yo, easy kid, start from the beginning.”
So I told them what happened at Yaschas Massif, where Vanille and I were kidding around. It’s been a long time since the Purge, when the Pulsian and I met, and the day I was thrust into a world of fighting for myself. But that was all, reminiscing, being friends…. From the start Vanille and I got a long, I’d like to think that, unlike some people that called me a nuisance. Reminiscing the day I met Lightning would just break my hopes of… well, that.
“Who you said was with you and Vanille while you were flirting like that-“
“I told you we’re not flirting.”
“So who, huh?”
“Us three were scouting ahead, Lightning-“
Snow pushed hard on my forehead with his finger; I felt winded just trying to stay still, “Bingo!! That’s your problem; it’s a man-law to never, EVER, ever COMPLETELY ignore a lady for another lady, especially if you like that lady.”
“Oh, that’s just bad, bad omen right there, kid.”
“What…. What… what?!”
Snow and Sazh sighed; I was waiting for a kindergarten explanation on what Snow just said. “Listen up kid, let’s say… Lightning, you and I went scouting ahead. And for some reason I wanted to talk her and ignore you, what would you feel?”
“Uh… nothing… should I feel something?”
“No, nothing is correct-but that’s because WE’RE guys Hope, and Vanille and Lightning are girls, they’re more touchy about those subjects.”
I wanted to say ‘but Light’s not like those girls, she’s… different.’ But all I could say was, “Oh… “ it wasn’t even an ‘I understand’ Oh, it was a ‘you’re confusing me so stop’ Oh. Snow and Sazh, they tried their best to explain what I did; but in the end, I still didn’t understand what made it so bad. All I know is, I did something and Lightning didn’t like it one bit, the question now is…. What do I do about it?
“There’s an ancient ruins up ahead, we should move camp… some Cie’th stones were there too.”
“They weren’t ruins before, right Fang?”
“Not to worry, Vanille, this place… is far from where Oerba is,”
“I hope you’re right…”
Snow stands up, then Sazh, “More people to help huh, well what are we waiting for, let’s go!” he says pumping his fist to the air and followed Vanille to the ruins, and so did Sazh and Fang. I managed to trudge forward and keep up with them (I was meters away from Lightning, she wasn’t too enthusiastic to play Hero as Snow is).
“Uhm… Light,” she stops, her back still turned away. “I’m… I’m sorry.”
“Tch. Hurry up.” I tried to catch up, dashing forward and latching myself by her wrist. To my surprise, she didn’t pull away or push me away, she just stood there. Waiting. For what I have to say? For an explanation to ‘I’m sorry’, who knows? But what I do know is she isn’t a patient person, and if I don’t do something, she would.
“For… ignoring you,” what!?
“What?”
“I mean… well, I meant… for something, I did something wrong didn’t I?”
She snorts, and pulls away walking forward. “Light… c’mon, if I did something wrong, just tell me!”
“You didn't do anything. So shut up, walk and get moving, I won’t be babying you.”
“What is… I just want to know why, you’re acting like this.” If you’re going to act like everything we’ve been through was nothing and just abandon me, then why tell me that you’d protect me? Or that you’ll stay with me? “What the hell, Lightning?!”
She raises her blade, swift and certain-I faintly forgot about the impending doom it would cause if I do get on her bad side. She drew it and recoils it again, “forget it. Let’s just move and get this over with.” There was a time when all I could look for in Lightning was strength, protection…and at that time, too, was fear. And if I hadn't changed, if she hadn’t changed me, then I’d probably just nod and go with the flow. Exactly as she told me: forget it.
But unlike before, I’m stronger now, and unlike before I made her a promise.
“Not until you tell me why, why are you acting like this Lightning?”
She merely nods her head to the side; I can read her as an open book at a time like this. It was her expression, her sighs and the way her eyes just slightly glare at the living: I have no time for this. “Acting like what?” she says instead.
“Like… like…” baffled, I really didn’t know what was wrong with Lightning. She just ignores me, doesn’t talk to me that much anymore and basically acted like the first time we met in Cocoon. But was that wrong? Is that something I should be demanding for her to change? Why do I want her to talk to me that much…great now I feel stupid.
“Hmph, still just a kid.” She mutters; her eyes a bit dull and sad, her voice stern albeit disappointed.
“-Light, you’ve been acting strange since that scouting mission back at Yaschas Massif, and I don’t know why. You were…” I can’t tell her that ‘you were always smiling at me, even if I did something small… said something I didn’t think was all that helpful. You just were and now, you don’t give me the time of day. What gives?’ that would just screw things up more. “… nicer, no-no that’s not it. You’re not-“
“I’m not nice enough for you, is that it? Well I’m sorry, the world can’t all just be shilly-shally and happy like you want them to be. If you’ve forgotten, we’re out here to save Cocoon, to save ourselves from the L’Cie curse and yet you find the time to be cuddling around with Vanille?! Fine then find your nice, kind princess. I’m out of here.” She explodes just like that, and in the bits and pieces of her anger I found my answer. She walked out on me-yet, I get the feeling I’ve been smiling like an idiot since she did.
--- --- --- --- ---“So Hope, you find out why Light’s been cold to you?”
“Yes and no, really, it ends with an ‘I don’t know’.” I chuckled, seeing Snow’s face confused like he actually cares about this selfish problem made me see just how funny I looked asking them ‘what I did’. It was obvious, for some reason her being ‘Lightning’ just confused me that much. I guess wisdom on this stuff comes with age and experience.
“I don’t get you kid, thought you’d work things out after we left?” Sazh came, his chocobo flying about and perching on top his head.
“I knew that was planned. Just didn’t know who to blame though,” I gave Snow the classic ‘I know it was you’ look and sighed. “Well… it certainly helped, not by much, but it helped.”
“Hey-hey-hey! Why you go and pin this all on me!?”
“Because you and Sazh are the only ones that knows about the problem.”
Silence.
With faltering hopes of redeeming the pride I had, I mutter a “She knows… doesn’t she… even before, did Light tell you?”
“Hey look here, we haven’t heard anything about you from Lightning-“at least, that’s something to hold on to. “But we did hear Vanille saying Lightning was treating her the same, a little cold and sour around the edges, and mightily fierce at the center. Whatever you two got going on, it’s definitely bothering Lightning.” Sazh interjected, and finally the pieces were aligned.
All of it piecing together the lofty, unbelievably, simple answer: The Lightning Farron was jealous. A large grin made its way to my face, and soon after, a condescending smirk was playing at its corners. Who would’ve have guessed. The cold attitude, the sudden disdain, and of course the outraged explosion on a simple words such as ‘nice’-it fit perfectly. Yet, after all that some questions still remain unanswered.
“Oh, the kid’s got a creepy smile on his face, not good.”
Snow huffs and chuckles, “Nah, Hope just figured out his problem. And my guess, it’s just as unbelievable as we thoughtt it was.”
“Who’d have thunk, ah well no use thinking about that. What you gonna do about it?”
I gave them my best try at a serious face (when all you feel is ecstatic and inconceivable joy, it’s quite an effort to keep a straight face), “I’m gonna go talk to her.”
--- --- --- ---“Lightning-“
She side-glances and nods for me to sit, “can I, talk to you about… the last time we talked?”
“This again, Hope, I said forget it.” She sighs, and moves to stand up, and walks away.
“I don’t want to forget it. I want to make it up to you.” I, of course, followed.
And for the first time in a long while, she smiles. When I first saw her smile like that, in the Gapra Whitewood, I didn’t think much of it then. It was just another ‘good job, Hope’, I never really saw it’s rarity until she decided I’m not worthy of it anymore. Then after so long, she finally turns to me with that gentle and perfectly constructed smile.
“Whatever I did, or am doing. I’m sorry, and I want you to know that. I’ll keep my promise to you, like I’ve always been. I wanted to become stronger so that I could protect Light too, so… please don’t make it harder for me. If I do something wrong, tell me. If you don’t like me talking to Vanille, then I won’t. Just… just don’t shut me out.” I walked towards her, grabbing hold of her hand. “Anything but that, Light.”
“Hope…” She makes a face I can’t discern for either guilt or happiness. She sighs and chuckles, flicking away at my forehead again like in Palompolum. “Didn’t I tell you, let go of sympathy and focus on your goal. You won’t make for a good solider like this.” She smiles.
“Well… actually, my goal right now was to apologize, I did pretty well, huh?”
“Don’t push it.”
“I’ll go see what Sazh and Snow are up to.”
Title: Puzzle Pieces
Pairing: Hope/Lightning
Summary: After the little scene on the edges of Yaschas Massif with Vanille, Lightning seems colder than ever to oblivious Hope. And because understanding why Lightning was mad in the first place was something Hope couldn’t figure on his own, Snow and Sazh decided to give the poor kid advice from their aged and experienced minds.
NOTE: (05/21/10) small revisions had been made :D
Puzzle Pieces
{LxH}
“Move!”
“L-Light!”
She doesn’t answer; the whole group already jumping down the cliff, leaving me confused as to why Lightning was acting so distant. Okay, well sure she is basically distant to everyone, but… I thought, what we had was different-I mean, uh… I mean, after all that time in the Vile Peaks and through Gapra Whitewood-something must have changed after that. Of course, Hope… build yourself up for a long fall.
“Hurry up kid, Sis is serious-she will leave you behind if you don’t pick up the slack,” Snow said before jumping down the cliff. What else could I do, wander around here thinking about WHY all of the sudden Lightning refuses to talk to me? Actually…
“Hope!!” I nearly fell off the cliff, when I heard her shout my name with an eerie reminiscent of our talk before Odin. You’re a liability, I can’t have that happening-I’m stronger now and besides, “I promised to keep her safe too.” And perfect landing; I looked up, searching for the quick (but still) smile that only appears before me. for me.
“What are you expecting a ‘good job’? Are you a pet now, let’s go.” Ouch.
“Light…” another cold shoulder. What the hell did I do?! Can’t she just tell me, I’d like to go up to her…okay, scratch that, I can’t go up to her when she’s already pissed like hell. I’d be next in line to the death list after Snow-if it’s Light’s D-list-I’m happy being ignored thank you very much.
--- --- --- ---- “Aww… why so glum, you want to go check out more of Gran Pulse with me, I’m sure that would brighten up your mood!” always the bright and bubbly; sometimes I can’t help but compare her to Lightning. Vanille is bright as the sun itself, while Lightning is… Lightning is as mysterious and beautiful as the view of Cocoon from Pulse; sure Cocoon can’t compare to Pulse, but when it comes right down to it… I’d rather go back to Cocoon, L’Cie or not L’Cie.
Same with Lightning; I forced a smile, “I’m fine, winded that’s all. I’ll take five-“
“B-but…” she sighs; I was holding my breath-it’s either she’d force me, or just leave me alone for a few minutes than force me again. “Alright, Fang!” Of course.
“Well, well, if it isn’t Mr. darkcloud ruining a day in hell-“
“Sazh, what did I tell you about calling Gran Pulse-“
He laughs a small level of fear present in the tone. Sazh sat beside me, Chocobo immediately flying near my face as if another ‘what’s wrong?’ person. I guess they’re all worried… well not all, there’s just… “I see. So it’s a woman problem that’s got you down. I’ve got to say Hope, for a kid to turn soldier in a few days, this is disappointing.” He chuckles, and I find the banter a little comforting.
I wonder what gave it off? Was it the uncontrollable staring, the moments where I’d cherish calling her ‘Light’ and not ‘Lightning’, or that I’m not behind her everywhere now. It wasn't my entire being’s fault that my eyes are attracted to her, no, that’s like blaming gravity for falling objects-it’s only natural.
“What…heh, nevermind.”
He snickers, “If you’re wondering what gave it away, it’s that stare of yours.” Chocobo flies back to him, kweh-ing about things I’d never find the time to think things through now, “Right you are chocobo! It’s that whole aura of yours! It just screams ‘lost puppy’, I mean chocobo here’s a chick but it can hold out without me or Dajh every now and then.”
“He~~eey, wha’cha guys talking about, I just got back with Lightning-“I just heard her name and instantly my eyes darted for the person’s voice, “…what’s with the needy look there, Hope?”
“Girl troubles.” Sazh simplified.
I heard a very, VERY stifled ‘pfft’ and snicker coming from Snow. Well I could have what guessed the ‘pfft’ for, but WHY exactly are they laughing-it’s not funny. I’d like to see him try to go a whole day with Serah cold shouldering him, and we’ll see what’s so funny. “Whoa-whoa, there goes your look again. Going to murder me now that Lightning’s gone?”
“Shut up.”
He snickers, “Easy, easy. I have nothing against what you feel kid, but damn. Lightning of all the women in the world…” I know, I know it’s an impossibility… it’s a stagger rate of 999.99%... but it’s just how it should be. How Lightning is, there is nothing about her that looked imperfect. That’s why I wanted to follow her, I wanted to be strong like her, and as I grew up by her side, the longer I watched and stood behind being guarded by her powerful stance… the more I wanted to protect and save her. “…Oh… boy, this can’t be happening. Are you serious here Hope?”
“What? I haven’t said anything!”
“You… love her, don’t you?”
My throat dries and the feeling of throwing up was near. I was hearing a couple of hysterical laughter and some thumping on the wood we sat on, but for the life of me I couldn’t manage to clear the words out of my mind. I know I want to protect Lightning, to save her, but does that mean…
“… that I… I… love,” I gulped, “her?” they exchanged looks and laughed again; I have yet to see what’s so funny about this. “Guys, c’mon. I need some wisdom from experience.”
Snow takes a deep breath, composing himself and punching his right fist to his open left hand, “What do you need?” Sazh nodded; “We’ll do our best, so shoot.”
“Well first, Lightning’s been really… uhm…”
“Mean.”
“Cold.”
“Nasty.”
I gave them a slight glare, “No, no and definitely no! Just… she’s being distant, lately…and I don’t know why. Does she seem different to you guys lately?”
They both shake their heads.
“Same solider girl as before,” Sazh commented.
“Eh… Lightning hasn’t really warmed up to me yet.” That’s because you’re marrying her sister, Snow really, sometimes I wonder what Serah saw in you.
“That’s odd… before-“
Sazh interrupted, “We know, you’re like the only living being on earth besides her Eidolon, and Serah that stuck to her and still ended up fine. I sure remember trying so hard to run after soldier girl at the Hanging Edge, good times… er, bad times… I’m not really sure.” He chuckles playing with chocobo chick again.
“That’s not it. Light was, I still hope she is, someone I could run to. She knows when I try to do my best, and when I try it just because she said to… I never complained as long as it’s her asking me to do something crazy, I know... whatever Light said must have a meaning to it… somewhere.” But right now, why can’t I. Why can’t I be the one that knows what’s wrong, did I do something wrong? Didn’t I watch her back well enough? “What the hell did I do!?”
“Yo, easy kid, start from the beginning.”
So I told them what happened at Yaschas Massif, where Vanille and I were kidding around. It’s been a long time since the Purge, when the Pulsian and I met, and the day I was thrust into a world of fighting for myself. But that was all, reminiscing, being friends…. From the start Vanille and I got a long, I’d like to think that, unlike some people that called me a nuisance. Reminiscing the day I met Lightning would just break my hopes of… well, that.
“Who you said was with you and Vanille while you were flirting like that-“
“I told you we’re not flirting.”
“So who, huh?”
“Us three were scouting ahead, Lightning-“
Snow pushed hard on my forehead with his finger; I felt winded just trying to stay still, “Bingo!! That’s your problem; it’s a man-law to never, EVER, ever COMPLETELY ignore a lady for another lady, especially if you like that lady.”
“Oh, that’s just bad, bad omen right there, kid.”
“What…. What… what?!”
Snow and Sazh sighed; I was waiting for a kindergarten explanation on what Snow just said. “Listen up kid, let’s say… Lightning, you and I went scouting ahead. And for some reason I wanted to talk her and ignore you, what would you feel?”
“Uh… nothing… should I feel something?”
“No, nothing is correct-but that’s because WE’RE guys Hope, and Vanille and Lightning are girls, they’re more touchy about those subjects.”
I wanted to say ‘but Light’s not like those girls, she’s… different.’ But all I could say was, “Oh… “ it wasn’t even an ‘I understand’ Oh, it was a ‘you’re confusing me so stop’ Oh. Snow and Sazh, they tried their best to explain what I did; but in the end, I still didn’t understand what made it so bad. All I know is, I did something and Lightning didn’t like it one bit, the question now is…. What do I do about it?
“There’s an ancient ruins up ahead, we should move camp… some Cie’th stones were there too.”
“They weren’t ruins before, right Fang?”
“Not to worry, Vanille, this place… is far from where Oerba is,”
“I hope you’re right…”
Snow stands up, then Sazh, “More people to help huh, well what are we waiting for, let’s go!” he says pumping his fist to the air and followed Vanille to the ruins, and so did Sazh and Fang. I managed to trudge forward and keep up with them (I was meters away from Lightning, she wasn’t too enthusiastic to play Hero as Snow is).
“Uhm… Light,” she stops, her back still turned away. “I’m… I’m sorry.”
“Tch. Hurry up.” I tried to catch up, dashing forward and latching myself by her wrist. To my surprise, she didn’t pull away or push me away, she just stood there. Waiting. For what I have to say? For an explanation to ‘I’m sorry’, who knows? But what I do know is she isn’t a patient person, and if I don’t do something, she would.
“For… ignoring you,” what!?
“What?”
“I mean… well, I meant… for something, I did something wrong didn’t I?”
She snorts, and pulls away walking forward. “Light… c’mon, if I did something wrong, just tell me!”
“You didn't do anything. So shut up, walk and get moving, I won’t be babying you.”
“What is… I just want to know why, you’re acting like this.” If you’re going to act like everything we’ve been through was nothing and just abandon me, then why tell me that you’d protect me? Or that you’ll stay with me? “What the hell, Lightning?!”
She raises her blade, swift and certain-I faintly forgot about the impending doom it would cause if I do get on her bad side. She drew it and recoils it again, “forget it. Let’s just move and get this over with.” There was a time when all I could look for in Lightning was strength, protection…and at that time, too, was fear. And if I hadn't changed, if she hadn’t changed me, then I’d probably just nod and go with the flow. Exactly as she told me: forget it.
But unlike before, I’m stronger now, and unlike before I made her a promise.
“Not until you tell me why, why are you acting like this Lightning?”
She merely nods her head to the side; I can read her as an open book at a time like this. It was her expression, her sighs and the way her eyes just slightly glare at the living: I have no time for this. “Acting like what?” she says instead.
“Like… like…” baffled, I really didn’t know what was wrong with Lightning. She just ignores me, doesn’t talk to me that much anymore and basically acted like the first time we met in Cocoon. But was that wrong? Is that something I should be demanding for her to change? Why do I want her to talk to me that much…great now I feel stupid.
“Hmph, still just a kid.” She mutters; her eyes a bit dull and sad, her voice stern albeit disappointed.
“-Light, you’ve been acting strange since that scouting mission back at Yaschas Massif, and I don’t know why. You were…” I can’t tell her that ‘you were always smiling at me, even if I did something small… said something I didn’t think was all that helpful. You just were and now, you don’t give me the time of day. What gives?’ that would just screw things up more. “… nicer, no-no that’s not it. You’re not-“
“I’m not nice enough for you, is that it? Well I’m sorry, the world can’t all just be shilly-shally and happy like you want them to be. If you’ve forgotten, we’re out here to save Cocoon, to save ourselves from the L’Cie curse and yet you find the time to be cuddling around with Vanille?! Fine then find your nice, kind princess. I’m out of here.” She explodes just like that, and in the bits and pieces of her anger I found my answer. She walked out on me-yet, I get the feeling I’ve been smiling like an idiot since she did.
--- --- --- --- ---“So Hope, you find out why Light’s been cold to you?”
“Yes and no, really, it ends with an ‘I don’t know’.” I chuckled, seeing Snow’s face confused like he actually cares about this selfish problem made me see just how funny I looked asking them ‘what I did’. It was obvious, for some reason her being ‘Lightning’ just confused me that much. I guess wisdom on this stuff comes with age and experience.
“I don’t get you kid, thought you’d work things out after we left?” Sazh came, his chocobo flying about and perching on top his head.
“I knew that was planned. Just didn’t know who to blame though,” I gave Snow the classic ‘I know it was you’ look and sighed. “Well… it certainly helped, not by much, but it helped.”
“Hey-hey-hey! Why you go and pin this all on me!?”
“Because you and Sazh are the only ones that knows about the problem.”
Silence.
With faltering hopes of redeeming the pride I had, I mutter a “She knows… doesn’t she… even before, did Light tell you?”
“Hey look here, we haven’t heard anything about you from Lightning-“at least, that’s something to hold on to. “But we did hear Vanille saying Lightning was treating her the same, a little cold and sour around the edges, and mightily fierce at the center. Whatever you two got going on, it’s definitely bothering Lightning.” Sazh interjected, and finally the pieces were aligned.
All of it piecing together the lofty, unbelievably, simple answer: The Lightning Farron was jealous. A large grin made its way to my face, and soon after, a condescending smirk was playing at its corners. Who would’ve have guessed. The cold attitude, the sudden disdain, and of course the outraged explosion on a simple words such as ‘nice’-it fit perfectly. Yet, after all that some questions still remain unanswered.
“Oh, the kid’s got a creepy smile on his face, not good.”
Snow huffs and chuckles, “Nah, Hope just figured out his problem. And my guess, it’s just as unbelievable as we thoughtt it was.”
“Who’d have thunk, ah well no use thinking about that. What you gonna do about it?”
I gave them my best try at a serious face (when all you feel is ecstatic and inconceivable joy, it’s quite an effort to keep a straight face), “I’m gonna go talk to her.”
--- --- --- ---“Lightning-“
She side-glances and nods for me to sit, “can I, talk to you about… the last time we talked?”
“This again, Hope, I said forget it.” She sighs, and moves to stand up, and walks away.
“I don’t want to forget it. I want to make it up to you.” I, of course, followed.
And for the first time in a long while, she smiles. When I first saw her smile like that, in the Gapra Whitewood, I didn’t think much of it then. It was just another ‘good job, Hope’, I never really saw it’s rarity until she decided I’m not worthy of it anymore. Then after so long, she finally turns to me with that gentle and perfectly constructed smile.
“Whatever I did, or am doing. I’m sorry, and I want you to know that. I’ll keep my promise to you, like I’ve always been. I wanted to become stronger so that I could protect Light too, so… please don’t make it harder for me. If I do something wrong, tell me. If you don’t like me talking to Vanille, then I won’t. Just… just don’t shut me out.” I walked towards her, grabbing hold of her hand. “Anything but that, Light.”
“Hope…” She makes a face I can’t discern for either guilt or happiness. She sighs and chuckles, flicking away at my forehead again like in Palompolum. “Didn’t I tell you, let go of sympathy and focus on your goal. You won’t make for a good solider like this.” She smiles.
“Well… actually, my goal right now was to apologize, I did pretty well, huh?”
“Don’t push it.”
“I’ll go see what Sazh and Snow are up to.”