Bring the shiny! And the sparkles. Then bring more. Picwar.
Picwar! T-the 23rd?
You can find attacks 1-22 here.
So in her last installment, Locky went for the insidious awful that seems mostly ok and then you realize you are in a sartorial Otherworld where foofy hair, dime-store children's sunglasses and hair bows meet up with Western fringe styling to bring together the worst of the 70s and 80s:
I decided to answer this with . . . a costume which takes the exact opposite tack, which is nevertheless just as evil in its manipulation of the viewer . . . perhaps more so.
You see . . . this costume almost literally blinds you with the brightness and shiny, and then after a while, you've totally accepted the utter ridiculousness of it, and soon . . . you start to think it's actually sort of . . . classy. I think the sparkles inject sparkle spores into the brain through the eyes and neutralize the part of your brain that handles rational judgement. It's just a theory though. It might be something even worse.
You know what this is? The glare from the very first Arashi concert outfits I ever saw.
You know how the light we see from stars actually was emitted zillions of years ago? I like to think that this costume is so shiny that long after the earth is a hollow bold blip in space, somebody out there is going to have a slightly brighter day than usual because the light reflected by these costumes will reach their solar system.
What? It could happen ^^” And I’m tired, sleep-deprived, and still recovering from the huge-ass tree in our yard that thankfully decided to fall into the street and not through our roof last night.
. . . Let’s just say that it was very windy last night, and there were some slightly harrowing moments where I wasn’t sure where the tree was going, but it was certainly going somewhere >_<
I have to say that I approve of its choice *____*
Anyway. The picwar . . .
I’m telling you, there is so much shininess in this costume, it’s potentially dangerous. >_<
Concert-planners kindly set off lots of fireworks to help fans’ eyes get prepared/adjusted for the extreme light reflection they are about to be subjected to.
I am not kidding. Look at them glowing like that. If I had greater faith in the irony of JE, I’d think they were making some kind of comment about golden idols, but alas.
Anyway. I went for shiny.
. . . the kind of shiny where the shiny fabric has sequins on it, and the sequins are adorned with beads, and the beads on the sequins have glitter on them, and the glitter . . . sweats or something. It’s shiny on shiny with a side of sparkly.
And then, just to screw with you, they threw in variably glistening accessories, feathers, faux fur, feathers with tinsel, not one but two leopard-print patterns (one of which is shiny on shiny), pyrotechnics, and . . . I don’t know, hotness all around.
And, somehow, I have been so brainwashed by Arashi costumes since that first shiny day, that when the Picwars began, I didn’t even think of using this costume because it seemed somehow too restrained and . . . classy?
*weeps uncontrollably*
OK, so what is really going on here? Let me break it down, lest the overpowering shiny obscure the details . . .
Gold on gold sequin vertical striped jackets.
And under that . . . gold on gold lamé leopard print shirts.
With glittery slightly belled and slit skinny gold pants that seriously look like they’d itch and be difficult to dance in.
With black and/or white and/or fur/animal print scarves, with or without extra sparkly.
Good lord, Jun . . . check out his rings *__*
You just had to outsparkle everyone else . . . or someone has made you very angry.
Both hands O___o
Jun does not appreciate it much when I mock his jewelery. Probably because they're part of his weight-training regime.
Like the rest of us, Sho has trouble seeing through the glare of these costumes.
No one will ever convince me that Wardrobe didn’t pick out Ohno’s scarf to match his hair.
>_>
You knew I wasn’t going to be able to resist that. It's Arashi fondling Ohno's rear. It's practically a religious experience.
Ok, so you know the team superhero shows where people twirl and then sparkles, a slit second of nudity, and then the characters are suddenly in their superhero clothes?
>_>
No reason.
Every once in a while, the gargantuan man-eating scarves attempt to rise up and eat their bearers.
All it can consume, however, is the jacket, which is where all the sparkly gold stuff came from.
LOOK OUT, SHO! IT’S GOING FOR YOUR ARM! >_<
He valiantly tries to escape it, but to no avail >_< That would require him to outrun something, and while it’s true the scarf technically doesn’t have legs . . . it still isn’t going to happen.
You know I love Sho, right? Because I do. But I'd still lay odds on the scarf in a race.
Nino’s scarf is the shiniest of all. It’s sometimes hard to see the scarf, because it somehow manages to be just as sparkly as the jacket *____*
Also, one leopard print is just not enough for Aiba, so he doubles up.
. . . I-I kind of love Aiba’s fringe-y leopard-print blanket scarf.
I’d suggest that Ohno’s scarf consumed his hair, but . . . let’s face it; his hair is too big in this set for that to be plausible . . . unless, of course that’s not his hair at all, but a colony of some kind.
Somehow, this much shiny seems to drive Arashi into a stratum of goofiness that’s excessive even for them.
Also, it apparently confers the power of flight:
A nice side effect of all that sparkly is that there are constantly self-referential rainbow sparkly glints everywhere on these costumes. You can trust me on this or click on the pictures to enlarge.
Have I mentioned the sparkly and the shiny?
. . . because I don’t think it’s really possible to overstate the case.
I would like to point out here that it’s kind of amazing that removing the gold-on-gold sequined jackets didn’t appreciably cut down on light pollution the shiny here.
Also, Aiba has no bones in his legs. True fact. A no Arashi
The shiny rainbow sparkles compel you!
Would anyone like to caption this? Too easy, I know, but . . . please?
OK, Locky. The ball is in your court ^_^
And on a personal note, today marked the last classes in my first year at my new job \o/ I survived!
Now all that's left is surviving a summer in Texas . . .
Many sincere thanks and hugs to my wonderful awesome flist, who seriously kept me sane this year&hearts How are you all doing?
*waves*
You can find attacks 1-22 here.
So in her last installment, Locky went for the insidious awful that seems mostly ok and then you realize you are in a sartorial Otherworld where foofy hair, dime-store children's sunglasses and hair bows meet up with Western fringe styling to bring together the worst of the 70s and 80s:
I decided to answer this with . . . a costume which takes the exact opposite tack, which is nevertheless just as evil in its manipulation of the viewer . . . perhaps more so.
You see . . . this costume almost literally blinds you with the brightness and shiny, and then after a while, you've totally accepted the utter ridiculousness of it, and soon . . . you start to think it's actually sort of . . . classy. I think the sparkles inject sparkle spores into the brain through the eyes and neutralize the part of your brain that handles rational judgement. It's just a theory though. It might be something even worse.
You know what this is? The glare from the very first Arashi concert outfits I ever saw.
You know how the light we see from stars actually was emitted zillions of years ago? I like to think that this costume is so shiny that long after the earth is a hollow bold blip in space, somebody out there is going to have a slightly brighter day than usual because the light reflected by these costumes will reach their solar system.
What? It could happen ^^” And I’m tired, sleep-deprived, and still recovering from the huge-ass tree in our yard that thankfully decided to fall into the street and not through our roof last night.
. . . Let’s just say that it was very windy last night, and there were some slightly harrowing moments where I wasn’t sure where the tree was going, but it was certainly going somewhere >_<
I have to say that I approve of its choice *____*
Anyway. The picwar . . .
I’m telling you, there is so much shininess in this costume, it’s potentially dangerous. >_<
Concert-planners kindly set off lots of fireworks to help fans’ eyes get prepared/adjusted for the extreme light reflection they are about to be subjected to.
I am not kidding. Look at them glowing like that. If I had greater faith in the irony of JE, I’d think they were making some kind of comment about golden idols, but alas.
Anyway. I went for shiny.
. . . the kind of shiny where the shiny fabric has sequins on it, and the sequins are adorned with beads, and the beads on the sequins have glitter on them, and the glitter . . . sweats or something. It’s shiny on shiny with a side of sparkly.
And then, just to screw with you, they threw in variably glistening accessories, feathers, faux fur, feathers with tinsel, not one but two leopard-print patterns (one of which is shiny on shiny), pyrotechnics, and . . . I don’t know, hotness all around.
And, somehow, I have been so brainwashed by Arashi costumes since that first shiny day, that when the Picwars began, I didn’t even think of using this costume because it seemed somehow too restrained and . . . classy?
*weeps uncontrollably*
OK, so what is really going on here? Let me break it down, lest the overpowering shiny obscure the details . . .
Gold on gold sequin vertical striped jackets.
And under that . . . gold on gold lamé leopard print shirts.
With glittery slightly belled and slit skinny gold pants that seriously look like they’d itch and be difficult to dance in.
With black and/or white and/or fur/animal print scarves, with or without extra sparkly.
Good lord, Jun . . . check out his rings *__*
You just had to outsparkle everyone else . . . or someone has made you very angry.
Both hands O___o
Jun does not appreciate it much when I mock his jewelery. Probably because they're part of his weight-training regime.
Like the rest of us, Sho has trouble seeing through the glare of these costumes.
No one will ever convince me that Wardrobe didn’t pick out Ohno’s scarf to match his hair.
>_>
You knew I wasn’t going to be able to resist that. It's Arashi fondling Ohno's rear. It's practically a religious experience.
Ok, so you know the team superhero shows where people twirl and then sparkles, a slit second of nudity, and then the characters are suddenly in their superhero clothes?
>_>
No reason.
Every once in a while, the gargantuan man-eating scarves attempt to rise up and eat their bearers.
All it can consume, however, is the jacket, which is where all the sparkly gold stuff came from.
LOOK OUT, SHO! IT’S GOING FOR YOUR ARM! >_<
He valiantly tries to escape it, but to no avail >_< That would require him to outrun something, and while it’s true the scarf technically doesn’t have legs . . . it still isn’t going to happen.
You know I love Sho, right? Because I do. But I'd still lay odds on the scarf in a race.
Nino’s scarf is the shiniest of all. It’s sometimes hard to see the scarf, because it somehow manages to be just as sparkly as the jacket *____*
Also, one leopard print is just not enough for Aiba, so he doubles up.
. . . I-I kind of love Aiba’s fringe-y leopard-print blanket scarf.
I’d suggest that Ohno’s scarf consumed his hair, but . . . let’s face it; his hair is too big in this set for that to be plausible . . . unless, of course that’s not his hair at all, but a colony of some kind.
Somehow, this much shiny seems to drive Arashi into a stratum of goofiness that’s excessive even for them.
Also, it apparently confers the power of flight:
A nice side effect of all that sparkly is that there are constantly self-referential rainbow sparkly glints everywhere on these costumes. You can trust me on this or click on the pictures to enlarge.
Have I mentioned the sparkly and the shiny?
. . . because I don’t think it’s really possible to overstate the case.
I would like to point out here that it’s kind of amazing that removing the gold-on-gold sequined jackets didn’t appreciably cut down on light pollution the shiny here.
Also, Aiba has no bones in his legs. True fact. A no Arashi
The shiny rainbow sparkles compel you!
Would anyone like to caption this? Too easy, I know, but . . . please?
OK, Locky. The ball is in your court ^_^
And on a personal note, today marked the last classes in my first year at my new job \o/ I survived!
Now all that's left is surviving a summer in Texas . . .
Many sincere thanks and hugs to my wonderful awesome flist, who seriously kept me sane this year&hearts How are you all doing?
*waves*