I know what you did last night [1/2]
Title: I know what you did last night [1/2]
Pairing: Richard Gasquet/Andy Murray
Other characters: Jamie Murray, Novak Djokovic
Rating: PG
Warning: a little bit of angst in this first part
Word count: 3,314
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters and this is a fiction.
Summary: Richard wakes up in the morning, yelling his lungs out.
Author’s note: I felt like writing something really cliché; about alcohol and its dooming results. The story is set during this year’s March and April, and betaed by crystaleyesd. I do realize that I should've written this sooner, since Richie won two titles in the past two weeks, but oh well XD
[Part I]
‘Ah, my head…’
Richard winced on his hotel bed as he felt his brain split in half. He wasn’t a heavy drinker and wasn’t used to all the side-effects caused by excessive consumption of alcohol. He vaguely remembered spending quite a few hours in the hotel bar, feeling sorry for himself. Few people still praised him for his wondrous talent, and he had been feeling that his game was deteriorating, that he wouldn’t belong in the highest part of the ranking if things went on this way.
‘Oh well, at least I have Andy…’
He turned around and faced the back of the man he loved so much. He had his own little morning routine that included getting a kiss from his boyfriend after counting the cute freckles on his back.
‘Hmm, it looks like he’s got some new freckles these days. Perhaps he should wear more sunscreen.’
Richard went from left to right, pointing at each freckle with affection. ‘One. Two. Three. Four. Five…’
And, just like all of their mornings together, Andy turned around with drowsiness apparent in his eyes. The only problem was that… it wasn’t Andy.
“Ahhhhh!!” Richard yelled his lungs out. This was bad.
The sleepy creature jumped out of bed as a reaction to the dramatic yelling while Richard wanted to tear his eyes out of his face so that he wouldn’t have to face his bed companion.
“Cover yourself, Jamie! I don’t need to see that!”
“What’s with all the screa… ahhhh!! Who are you? I mean, what are you doing here?? Wait. This isn’t my room. It must be yours. What am I doing here??”
Jamie looked down at his own naked form and then at his brother’s boyfriend on the bed. He had thought that it had only been a pleasant dream. Apparently, he was wrong.
“Oh god, I’m so dead.” The Scot could hear the dooms bell ring in his ears as he picked up his jeans and rushed his legs into them.
“No. We are dead.” Richard corrected him.
“No. Andy will eventually let you live. But he’ll bury me under the deepest seas after I get ripped apart by twenty big sharks.”
“Why twenty?” Richard asked, going through the drawer of the nightstand table to get some pills for his headache.
“I don’t feel like he’s going to be generous enough to let only a few sharks finish me quickly. I will suffer a very slow and painful death.” Jamie groaned with despair and collected his wrinkled shirt from the floor.
“But… maybe nothing happened.” Richard tried to sound hopeful even though the sheets told him otherwise.
Jamie blushed as he started to see flashes in his head of what had happened last night. “You may not feel anything different, but believe me, I do. Urgh…”
“Oh…” Richard ducked his head and bit his lips. He couldn’t look Jamie in the eyes. It was embarrassing.
“How are we going to tell him?” The French felt crying and dying at the same time. He had never thought that a day would come when he would have to deal with such a mistake.
“We could always hide it and pretend that it never happened.”
Fear was apparent in the Scot’s voice. He was the only one apart from God who knew what Andy Murray was capable of.
“But Andy and I don’t keep secrets from each other!”
Before Jamie could say anything back, there came a knock on the door.
Knock-knock.
“Yikes! Did you order room service?” Jamie whispered with horror.
“What? No! I just woke up and started yelling at you!”
“Shh! It could be Andy!”
“It could be my coach.”
“Grandpa or the new one?”
“Don’t call him grandpa! He’s not that old.”
Knock-knock-knock.
Richard put on a shower gown and urged Jamie to hide with his wallet and shoes.
“Who is it?” The French cried out as he checked himself in the mirror. Thankfully, he couldn’t spot any suspicious marks on his neck.
“It’s me.”
The temperature of the room dropped below zero as the boys shuddered at the voice of he who would judge them on the Judgment day- or much earlier than they hoped.
“I’m coming, Andy! One sec!”
While Jamie quickly hid under the bed, Richard made the bed so that his boyfriend wouldn’t notice how messy the sheets were.
“What took you so long? You were asleep?” Andy marched into the room as soon as Richard let him in.
“Yeah, I just woke up.” Richard had never been so glad to have messy hair in the morning.
“Then, how come your bed is all made? You never arrange your bed.” Andy eyed the bedcovers that almost didn’t have a single wrinkle.
“I… uh… I fell asleep on the couch. My bad.”
“Oh, that explains why you look so tense. Come here, pet, let me loosen up your muscles.”
Richard reluctantly walked over to his boyfriend and sat on the couch. “It’s okay. You don’t have to do that. I’ll feel better after a warm shower.”
He was terrified that Andy might smell someone else on him and cursed himself for having drunk that much last night. He and Jamie had run into each other in the hotel bar and had bonded over ‘we suck so much at tennis these days’ a little too much.
“So what did you do last night? You didn’t answer your phone.” Andy lowered a bit of Richard’s gown and started massaging the creamy shoulders.
Richard barely managed to stop himself from hiccupping and tried to answer in a confident voice. “I had a few drinks at the bar. I don’t have a match today.”
“You stayed that late there? I called you around half past eleven. Wanted to wish you good night.”
“Oh, by then, I must’ve passed out on the couch.”
Richard felt his heart beat faster and faster as he cooked up a string of lies. There were no words that could describe how absolutely horrible he was feeling right now. He had slept with another man and Andy was currently pouring his affection on his shoulders; the same shoulders that his brother had held onto while Andy had been calling to say good night.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t join you yesterday. I know we were supposed to go for a walk after dinner and all. You got my text, right?”
“Yeah. Don’t worry. I amused myself just fine.” Richard hoped that Andy couldn’t detect the bit of sarcasm in his voice.
“Well, we had a problem with one of the cameras so it took us extra hours to get the ad done. What a shame.” Andy pressed his lips against Richard’s hair and stopped moving his hands. The hair smelt different.
“You changed your shampoo?”
Richard closed his eyes and nodded. A part of him wanted to turn around and tell Andy that he had accidentally cheated on him and beg him to have mercy on Jamie and himself, but another part of him told him that it would be too risky. Andy might never forgive him and he could lose his perfect boyfriend forever.
“Hmm… I know it’s none of my business, but I think I like the old one better.” Andy resumed massaging the shoulders, but it only made Richard feel more weight on them.
“You want me to order room service?” The Scot asked, figuring that a big breakfast would do his boyfriend some good after perhaps a few too many drinks.
“Can we eat in your room, please?” Richard found himself asking very politely, guilt crushing him. He could never swallow a single crumb of bread in the room where he had committed adultery.
“Eh, sure. Why not? You’re okay, pet? Don’t worry about the results too much. You’re getting there. I know you still have it in you. Talent isn’t going anywhere, you know.”
Andy knew how hard it had been for Richard to step on court these days. He had no confidence left in his game and he feared that people had already seen the best of him years ago. It was just too bad that Andy hadn’t found enough time to comfort him more often. His agenda was pretty tight and as one of the top players on tour, he had to make himself available for various types of promotional activities.
“So… breakfast? Can you order for me while I take a quick shower and join you?” Richard stood up rather abruptly from the couch, not able to stand Andy’s gentle caresses any longer.
“Okay. I’ll be waiting in my room then.”
Andy tried to lean in and kiss his boyfriend, but Richard instinctively took a step back. “Oh, sorry. It’s just that I must have a stinky breath. I’m not sure if I managed to stick a toothbrush in my mouth last night.”
The Scot chuckled and settled for a peck on the forehead before heading to the door. He wondered if something other than tennis was bothering his boyfriend; he felt very distanced and different today.
“This is pure torture.” Richard groaned as he changed his grip. He had confided in his best friend, Novak, about what had happened last night.
“Why did it have to be Jamie? Why couldn’t it have been some random player? Then, Andy would’ve killed him on court, spanked me in bed, and we’d live happily ever after! Urgh…”
“You want me to talk to Andy? Not that I can guarantee anything, but I could tell him how miserable you looked while hitting with me.” Novak offered, feeling bad that something had happened between his two best friends.
“I appreciate it, but that’s a very bad idea. You know how jealous he can be. He’ll probably kill the messenger too.”
Richard kicked one of his empty water bottles. He wished he could turn back the hands of time and never leave his hotel room that night. He had no idea how Jamie was dealing with the guilt, but he didn’t think he could live with it for much longer.
“I should just sit with him and tell him what has happened. I don’t think there’s any good way to tell your boyfriend about how you cheated on him.”
Novak gave his friend a warm hug. “I agree. He’ll forgive you eventually, you know. He loves you very very much.”
“I hope so.” Richard answered dejectedly.
Then, his head shot up and the Serb wondered what the matter was.
“What if he storms out of the room before I finish my story and never come back? He’s not a patient guy.”
Novak rubbed his chin for a moment before deciding to share his experience. “You know what Ernie does whenever he did something bad and knows that I’ll be mad?”
“No.” Richard was curious.
“He cuffs me to the bedpost and practically raps about what he did. According to him, that way, I can’t really understand what he says and can’t stay mad for long, and most importantly, it keeps me from leaving and making him spend a miserable night alone.”
“Ooh, not a bad idea.”
Novak shrugged. “Well, it’s not a great idea, but if you’re so scared that Andy will walk out on you, perhaps it’s worth a try.”
“But I can’t rap. He’s the rapper, not me.” Richard was worried.
“Eh, I don’t think you really have to take Ernie’s example part by part. I’m sure speaking normally will do fine.”
The French nodded and thanked his friend. As scary as it might be, he knew that it had to be done. Tonight, he was going to tell his boyfriend that he had cheated on him.
So later in the evening, Richard called Jamie to let him know about his plan. The Scot asked him what his part was and Richard told him to pray like hell that Andy wouldn’t figure out a way to uncuff himself and leave the hotel room because the next destination would probably be Jamie’s room. The elder Scot shuddered and told Richard that he wouldn’t leave his room until he got a call from him the next morning and that he would barricade his door, just in case.
As soon as he got off the phone with the terrified soul, Richard carefully prepared his words of apology and glanced at the shiny pair of cuffs that were lying on his bed. He didn’t even know if Andy would be fine with being tied up. They had been together for over a year now, but bondage hadn’t been on their list of adventures.
‘Oh well, it’s not like things can get any worse.’
Richard put on the tightest jeans he had and grabbed one of Andy’s shirts. The Scot loved to see him wrapped around in his own clothes and Richard was relieved that Andy always left a couple of fresh shirts in his room. Then, he texted Andy who had gone out for a while to discuss his game plan with his coach: Baby, I’ve got a surprise for you. Hurry up!
‘Well, it really is a surprise. I couldn’t shock him any more even if I wanted to.’
The sad guy sat on the couch and waited for his soon-to-be ex-boyfriend. He knew how Andy’s mind worked. He didn’t expect the Scot to forgive him right away. It would probably take him weeks or months before he felt comfortable seeing his face again. Richard just wished that sooner or later, he would be forgiven.
“Hey, I ran as fast as I could. What’s the surprise?” Andy walked into the hotel room, trying to catch his breath.
Richard gave him a quick smile as he headed for the bedroom. He didn’t feel even remotely sexy tonight, but he would rather be done with it as soon as possible.
‘Since when did having sex with Andy become something that had to be done?’
He shook his head and climbed on the bed. He felt Andy follow him after losing his shoes and socks.
“Oh, you’ve got us handcuffs. Who’s been the bad boy?” Andy pulled Richard by the waist and gave him a lingering kiss.
“I have…” Richard whispered, feeling like he should run into the bathroom and throw up everything inside him. He felt sick.
“I’ll have to tie you up then. And, did I mention how much I love you in that shirt of mine?” Andy placed affectionate kisses on the side of Richard’s neck when the French freaked out.
“No! You are going to be tied up! Not me! You!”
The Scot gave his boyfriend a strange look, but figured that he was just nervous as they were about to try something new.
“If you say so. Now let’s get you out of these jeans.”
Andy moved his hands up and down Richard’s thighs, hoping that it would soothe his boyfriend’s nerves. Richard felt very tense and Andy was getting worried.
“Are you okay? Would you like to watch a movie or do something else instead?” If Richard wasn’t in the mood for sex or was uncomfortable with handcuffs, Andy had no problem switching his attention to other activities.
“No. It’s just that…” Richard didn’t know how to finish his sentence. It’s just that he had cheated.
“Tell me what’s wrong, pet. You know you can tell me anything.” Andy took Richard’s hands into his and before he knew it, his right hand was cuffed to Richard’s.
“Err… Richie?” Andy wasn’t sure what was going on.
“There’s something I have to tell you.”
Richard felt himself tear up. He didn’t cry often, but he couldn’t help it; he was about to break the heart of his beloved boyfriend and there was no easy way to do it.
“I’m listening.” Andy held up his cuffed hand, indicating that he now understood the sudden appearance of the cuffs in their bedroom.
“I drank too much yesterday. God, I’m so sorry, Andy.” Richard’s head dropped in shame. He was mortified.
“What are you talking about?” Andy wasn’t following.
“Something happened last night. I made a horrible mistake!”
“Like what?” Andy had a feeling that he would be better off without hearing it, but it seemed like Richard had to get it off his chest.
“I don’t remember much, but when I woke up this morning, there was someone in my bed.” Richard looked up with woeful eyes. There were no words to let his boyfriend know how awfully sorry he was.
“Like who…?” Andy wanted to shut his mouth, but the question was already out. He had to know.
“Like… your brother.” Richard closed his eyes and clenched his teeth, bracing himself for a hard punch on the face.
But the punch never arrived. There was utter silence in the room and Richard wasn’t sure if he liked the quiet Andy any better than the violent one.
“I swear I didn’t want him. It was an accident.” Richard insisted, as if it helped in any kind of way.
“I know I may have lost the right to say this, but you’re still the only one I adore and care. I promise it will never happen again and I pray that you’ll find a way to forgive me. Whatever it takes, I’d like to get your forgiveness. Please, Andy. I’m sorry…”
His voice was hardly louder than a whisper, but Andy was close enough to catch every word and he could hear the sincerity and resentfulness in the frightened voice.
“Come here.”
Andy invited Richard into his arms and lay down with him. Whatever had happened, he didn’t like to see his boyfriend in such a fragile state. His mind refused to believe that Richard and Jamie had done such a disturbing thing together, and he was thankful that he wasn’t taking out his anger on his boyfriend. Enough damage had been done in this relationship; he didn’t need to torture Richard with cruel words and make matters worse.
“I love you, Andy.” Richard whispered and clung tight to the man he loved. It was uncertain when he would be able to hold him again, so he tried to make the most of it.
“I will probably love you again” were the last words that slipped into Richard’s head before he fell asleep, exhausted from all the tension and guilt that had been tormenting him all day.
When Richard woke up a couple of hours later, Andy was nowhere to be found. No warmth left under the covers, no socks or shoes on the floor, and no notes with little hearts at the end. It was like Andy had never been in the room. It was like Andy had never existed in his life.
Then, Richard noticed how the handcuffs had vanished as well. If there was anything that prevented him from wondering if Andy had only been a product of his wicked imagination, it was the pajama pants. He was wearing his old, comfortable pajama pants instead of those tight jeans.
‘I’m so sorry, Andy.’
Richard felt his subconsciousness shut him out from the world. He went back into a deep sleep; an emotional coma that would keep him out for the next twenty hours.
TO BE CONTINUED...