mommy issues
i think... still in review of course, cuz i am indeed a bad person who deserves it... mum is emotionally abusive.
oh jesus. i dont have the power in me to type it all up right now, but i'm afraid that if i stop i won't be able to recall such potent feelings.
but how could that be true? All my life, mother's self-harm has lurked behind doors and calls and hospital walls. It is a useful tactic; this she knows.
she is a narcissist. she recalls episodes of her young cuteness to make me feel like an oaf, purposefully, i know think. she'll tell me i'm beautiful with my gourgeous features and strip it away in an instant, because I'ma fat pig who likes to dwell in feces, right?
good god. all the years she's let me in on the secret of all her heartaches, all the abuse she's been through, which no one will corroborate... she's been setting up her own cocoon of abuse while repeating, "I escaped the cycle, I would never hurt my loved ones," while driving everyone she ever thought dear to the very edge of having anything to do with her. I seem to be the last one. And now i have caught on.
oh jesus. i dont have the power in me to type it all up right now, but i'm afraid that if i stop i won't be able to recall such potent feelings.
but how could that be true? All my life, mother's self-harm has lurked behind doors and calls and hospital walls. It is a useful tactic; this she knows.
she is a narcissist. she recalls episodes of her young cuteness to make me feel like an oaf, purposefully, i know think. she'll tell me i'm beautiful with my gourgeous features and strip it away in an instant, because I'ma fat pig who likes to dwell in feces, right?
good god. all the years she's let me in on the secret of all her heartaches, all the abuse she's been through, which no one will corroborate... she's been setting up her own cocoon of abuse while repeating, "I escaped the cycle, I would never hurt my loved ones," while driving everyone she ever thought dear to the very edge of having anything to do with her. I seem to be the last one. And now i have caught on.