I will be happy again
I hate my life, everything fucking sucks. I wish i could fucking run away go somewhere new, where no one knows me so i can do what ever the fuck i want. I want to go somewhere and be a fucking whore, then move again and be a psychologist or something and have people actually listen to me, then i want to move again to another country and be part of a mofia and do what ever i want and have people fear me and do what i want them to do. i want to come back and see who feared my death, who cried, i want to make amends and be punished for my mistakes, i want the problems of today to be over so i can deal with the problems of tomorrow. when people fear for someones life they realize how unimportant everything else is, they realize how you should live, to the fullest. they realize all the stupid problems we face today are simply going to be a bad memory/dream tomorrow. life is hard enough we dont need to make it harder for on ourselves or on others. i wish i could knock some people over their heads and give them amnesia, and tell them their lives stories and so they can see it with all the good instead of all the bad, i want to make them see courage and teach them to face their problems instead of run from their fears. All the "MEN" i know run, they dont know how to face it, they dont know how to turn the other cheek, they dont know how to get over it or be happy after something bad happens. I want to give them back their dreams of happiness and leave out the evil, i want to show them how to love for real. i need to show them, but i cant bc they dont want to see, they are scared and dont know what to do, yet to stupid to listen to me when i do know what to do. i am depressed i feel like my family isnt my family, and like the ones i love my best friends such as ashii and maru are no longer important. But i know i am wrong, this is my problem of today, tomorrow it will be faint and i will be happy, all i need to do is laugh, face my problems head on, i refuse to run. I LOVE ALL OF YOU know that from now untill the end, my love never dies it is to precious and rare a thing to let fade a away.