Poppy's arrival
So many people have asked me if I got the home birth I wanted, and each time I laugh a little. I certainly got the home birth but I can't say it went exactly how I wanted. You'd think with my third baby I'd be able to recognise the signs of labour right? Or at least make some basic connections between separate events. I can only say that it must have been tiredness and a disbelief that I was ever going to go into labour led to the events of Friday morning.
On Thursday 10th my midwife came for a visit and did a stretch and sweep to try to get things moving. I was a week overdue and not seeing any 'signs' that things were happening, and after the procedure my midwife said I'd made no progress from the last time she checked. I'd had the same thing done twice when I was over due with Daisy and once with Felix and each time had been very painful. This time I felt nothing and I assumed it had had no effect. That was mistake number one. I went to bed at 10pm and then woke at 11pm to go to the toilet, and then spent the next two hours going between the bedroom and the bathroom. I assumed I had a dodgy tummy from something I ate and as I have a naturally sensitive stomach (and therefore suffer these bouts often) I thought nothing of it. Mistake number two. At 1am I ran a warm bath as my back was a bit sore and I was feeling crampy (stomach crampy that is) and I was having a few strong Braxton Hicks. I figured the warm bath would soothe my muscles and I tucked myself into a comfortable position. That meant using my legs as a kind of brake against the sides of the bath and as a result I drifted off to sleep. The was mistake number three. About an hour later I was jolted awake by a contraction that went for about 90 seconds. It went on and on and was shockingly painful, and I realised I was in the late stages of labour. I had shut the bathroom door on my way in and as a result I quickly realised Chris couldn't her me calling out. Each time I tried to climb out of the bath a contraction would hit and I would be forced back down from the pain and I began to realise I was in trouble. Fortunately after about 30 to 40 mins Chris heard me and came to help and that's when things got really exciting.
After calling my Mum to come over and watch the kids, and my midwives to ask them to meet us at the birth centre, Chris got down to the important business of making sure I had ice to eat. I practically live on crushed/shaved ice when I am pregnant but when I'm in labour it is all I want, it's like a drug. When Mum arrived the first thing I heard her say was that we didn't have time to go to the hospital as my contractions were too close together. The midwives were called and told to come here instead, and that is when I felt the urge to push. Chris then called an ambulance and prepared himself to deliver the baby. I managed to get out of the bath at this point, despite the pain, but stayed on the bathroom floor. Not long afterwards the ambulance crew arrived and suddenly our bathroom was full of people and noise. A couple of pushes later and Poppy arrived into the hands of an ambulance guy, and the hardest couple of hours in my life were over.
The next few hours are a bit of a blur for me. I know my midwives arrived not long after, and that I was transported to hospital in an ambulance. My blood pressure was very low and they also wanted me to deliver the placenta in a delivery suite rather than at home or in the ambulance. At the hospital all I could focus on was the pain of needing to deliver the placenta and for some reason I was struggling to keep my eyes open. I think I was in shock actually, and my mind was keeping me from opening my eyes as a way of coping with what had transpired over the previous couple of hours. Certainly, once I was given the injection to get the third stage over with I felt a lot better and started to focus more on what was going on around me. It was about this time that Poppy was weighed and when they told me she was 4.2kg I was pretty surprised. I had figured she was bigger than Felix (I could just tell by how she felt towards the end of the pregnancy) but I hadn't picked her as being as big as Daisy. And the fact that I was able to push out a big baby that quickly was also a surprise as I had struggled to get Daisy out for almost 18 hours and assumed it was based on how I was built. Obviously there were other factors at play with Daisy's birth and my body shape/size had nothing to do with it.
I was determined to get out of the hospital as quickly as possible as I am certain a lot of my post-natal mental health problems are triggered by being in that place. All the beeping, all the intrusion, having to share a room with a stranger, these are all things that set me off. But because I was strep positive they wanted to keep Poppy in for 24 hours to monitor. Fortunately I had a superbly fierce midwife looking after me (my main midwife had to go home at 8am but the woman who replaced her was the one who replaced her when she was on annual leave) and she heavily advocated for me to go home. I think the paedatrician relented purely to stop her from lecturing him on how crap staying in hospital is so by 3pm I was able to go home and be surrounded by the things that make me feel safe.
I have to give major props to my student midwife here actually. Kylie had to drive all the way down from Gawler for most of my appointments, and then had to do it in the wee hours of the morning for Poppy's arrival. I was so disappointed that she missed out on catching the baby and doubly disappointed that it was a home birth that I know she really would like to have attended. She was a total rock through my whole pregnancy and took great care of me at the hospital too and I feel bad that I couldn't return the favour by actually having her at the birth. I fear I was quite non-responsive for a quite a while too as 3/4 of my brain shut down but in that time I think she helped Chris out by keeping him company. His experience was equally as shocking as mine, just in a less physical way, but he still had to handle a lot of stress and responsibility at a time when he probably just wanted someone else to look after it all. She'll be moving to Sydney next year so she won't get much of a chance to see Poppy growing but we visit Sydney often enough that we'll hopefully be able to catch up once or twice a year.
I slotted back into life quite quickly this time. My recovery has been pretty darn painful but my mind is clear so I'm feeling pretty good about that. Without getting too graphic you don't push out a big baby that quickly without some damage (my body just wasn't ready and ambulance officers aren't trained to get babies out gently like a midwife is.) And when the guy who comes in to do the stitches takes one look and then goes and gets his supervisor to come do it you know you are in a bit of trouble. Add to that the strained back muscles from the sudden and full on contractions and of course the sore boobs and you get a pretty miserable first week. But at just over a week now I'm pretty much pain free and have been out and about with the family quite a few times, and may even venture as far as Spotlight tomorrow to get a few last minute supplies. I'm certainly not worried about hosting Christmas Day lunch now as I know I can handle it physically and I can just pass Poppy around (she is a ridiculously mellow baby) in order to free up my hands and get things done.
On Thursday 10th my midwife came for a visit and did a stretch and sweep to try to get things moving. I was a week overdue and not seeing any 'signs' that things were happening, and after the procedure my midwife said I'd made no progress from the last time she checked. I'd had the same thing done twice when I was over due with Daisy and once with Felix and each time had been very painful. This time I felt nothing and I assumed it had had no effect. That was mistake number one. I went to bed at 10pm and then woke at 11pm to go to the toilet, and then spent the next two hours going between the bedroom and the bathroom. I assumed I had a dodgy tummy from something I ate and as I have a naturally sensitive stomach (and therefore suffer these bouts often) I thought nothing of it. Mistake number two. At 1am I ran a warm bath as my back was a bit sore and I was feeling crampy (stomach crampy that is) and I was having a few strong Braxton Hicks. I figured the warm bath would soothe my muscles and I tucked myself into a comfortable position. That meant using my legs as a kind of brake against the sides of the bath and as a result I drifted off to sleep. The was mistake number three. About an hour later I was jolted awake by a contraction that went for about 90 seconds. It went on and on and was shockingly painful, and I realised I was in the late stages of labour. I had shut the bathroom door on my way in and as a result I quickly realised Chris couldn't her me calling out. Each time I tried to climb out of the bath a contraction would hit and I would be forced back down from the pain and I began to realise I was in trouble. Fortunately after about 30 to 40 mins Chris heard me and came to help and that's when things got really exciting.
After calling my Mum to come over and watch the kids, and my midwives to ask them to meet us at the birth centre, Chris got down to the important business of making sure I had ice to eat. I practically live on crushed/shaved ice when I am pregnant but when I'm in labour it is all I want, it's like a drug. When Mum arrived the first thing I heard her say was that we didn't have time to go to the hospital as my contractions were too close together. The midwives were called and told to come here instead, and that is when I felt the urge to push. Chris then called an ambulance and prepared himself to deliver the baby. I managed to get out of the bath at this point, despite the pain, but stayed on the bathroom floor. Not long afterwards the ambulance crew arrived and suddenly our bathroom was full of people and noise. A couple of pushes later and Poppy arrived into the hands of an ambulance guy, and the hardest couple of hours in my life were over.
The next few hours are a bit of a blur for me. I know my midwives arrived not long after, and that I was transported to hospital in an ambulance. My blood pressure was very low and they also wanted me to deliver the placenta in a delivery suite rather than at home or in the ambulance. At the hospital all I could focus on was the pain of needing to deliver the placenta and for some reason I was struggling to keep my eyes open. I think I was in shock actually, and my mind was keeping me from opening my eyes as a way of coping with what had transpired over the previous couple of hours. Certainly, once I was given the injection to get the third stage over with I felt a lot better and started to focus more on what was going on around me. It was about this time that Poppy was weighed and when they told me she was 4.2kg I was pretty surprised. I had figured she was bigger than Felix (I could just tell by how she felt towards the end of the pregnancy) but I hadn't picked her as being as big as Daisy. And the fact that I was able to push out a big baby that quickly was also a surprise as I had struggled to get Daisy out for almost 18 hours and assumed it was based on how I was built. Obviously there were other factors at play with Daisy's birth and my body shape/size had nothing to do with it.
I was determined to get out of the hospital as quickly as possible as I am certain a lot of my post-natal mental health problems are triggered by being in that place. All the beeping, all the intrusion, having to share a room with a stranger, these are all things that set me off. But because I was strep positive they wanted to keep Poppy in for 24 hours to monitor. Fortunately I had a superbly fierce midwife looking after me (my main midwife had to go home at 8am but the woman who replaced her was the one who replaced her when she was on annual leave) and she heavily advocated for me to go home. I think the paedatrician relented purely to stop her from lecturing him on how crap staying in hospital is so by 3pm I was able to go home and be surrounded by the things that make me feel safe.
I have to give major props to my student midwife here actually. Kylie had to drive all the way down from Gawler for most of my appointments, and then had to do it in the wee hours of the morning for Poppy's arrival. I was so disappointed that she missed out on catching the baby and doubly disappointed that it was a home birth that I know she really would like to have attended. She was a total rock through my whole pregnancy and took great care of me at the hospital too and I feel bad that I couldn't return the favour by actually having her at the birth. I fear I was quite non-responsive for a quite a while too as 3/4 of my brain shut down but in that time I think she helped Chris out by keeping him company. His experience was equally as shocking as mine, just in a less physical way, but he still had to handle a lot of stress and responsibility at a time when he probably just wanted someone else to look after it all. She'll be moving to Sydney next year so she won't get much of a chance to see Poppy growing but we visit Sydney often enough that we'll hopefully be able to catch up once or twice a year.
I slotted back into life quite quickly this time. My recovery has been pretty darn painful but my mind is clear so I'm feeling pretty good about that. Without getting too graphic you don't push out a big baby that quickly without some damage (my body just wasn't ready and ambulance officers aren't trained to get babies out gently like a midwife is.) And when the guy who comes in to do the stitches takes one look and then goes and gets his supervisor to come do it you know you are in a bit of trouble. Add to that the strained back muscles from the sudden and full on contractions and of course the sore boobs and you get a pretty miserable first week. But at just over a week now I'm pretty much pain free and have been out and about with the family quite a few times, and may even venture as far as Spotlight tomorrow to get a few last minute supplies. I'm certainly not worried about hosting Christmas Day lunch now as I know I can handle it physically and I can just pass Poppy around (she is a ridiculously mellow baby) in order to free up my hands and get things done.