When I got back from Africa - old but funny
Cultural Adjustments,
from FJ
"So my mother and I are coming back from a performance of Riverdance the Show (which I highly recommend) and as we're cruising down the Detroit expressway I notice a sign...no not quite a sign much larger.... more like a billboard.....actually it was a billboard that had about five foot tall letters in black and red and gold relay this message to all the passers-by (mind you I don't make this stuff up):
WHO'S THE FATHER?
1-800-DNA-TYPE
...on American TV, cell phones, fast food...
Now to go along with this experience I watched about 5 minutes of a T.V. show that I couldn't believe existed. Now I must admit I didn't know it existed until a fellow co-worker suggested I watch it. Perhaps you've heard of it...the Jerry Springer Show? This is the epitome of American Violence and Stupidity at its finest for entertainment. Let me clue you in if you've never seen this show. We have guest on the show that have done something really stupid like sleep with another man while married, or men that date prostitutes hoping they'll give up their profession. Now as we set the stage the originator of the conflict come out on the stage and invites the unsuspecting innocent to join them. There on national television they explain how they've been cheating and stealing or any number of other unethical practices. Embarrassing the unsuspecting innocent on national television and in front of a live audience. However it gets better. Then bring the object of embarrassment onto the stage after commercial break of course in order to watch them fight it out but without Don King, boxing gloves and a million dollar purse at the end. My kinda real entertainment. And all of this at the low low cost of cable. Which I hear if you sign over your first born they'll throw in HBO.
But enough of that sillyness I need to share with you my own stupidity. The CAR-CELLULAR PHONE INCIDENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So I'm new to cellulars right? I think they're really cool and all so I start talking with me mother as I'm driving. Not a good idea. DO they have laws against that? She's trying to give me directions to a place as I'm driving, listening, watching, and trying not to end up in the trunk of the car in front of me. Way to much stimulus at once for me. It was more like a Mr. Toad's Wildride sensory overload for me then it was a good time. I use cellular phones while stopped or standing until I build up that American ability to filter out all of the sensory input that beats at us all day long.
Finally, I'd like to just God Bless America for fast food delivery and preparation. In Africa the quickest fastfood meal I ever got from my mamma was about 2 hours. Here instant gratification! Wonderful. Food Food Food. And the incredible thing about food and phones. You can call food and it'll come running. You can even call food in your car on the phone, but I wouldn't advise it. You could even probably eat while driving and talking on the phone but that would be way over my head at the moment. I may need several months of training for that feat. However I don't deny the millions everyday who do it without getting killed. That's the truly amazing part. I also love the variety of meals here in the states. People are so picky...oh I don't eat that. Why I wonder? Is it because there's so much variety, they're allergic or because they just picky? All I can say is I was picky when I left this country and now I eat everything. After an elephant burger, monkey in red sauce, or palm grubs, you sure appreciate anything that's served to you non-moving, without the skin, and head.
from FJ
"So my mother and I are coming back from a performance of Riverdance the Show (which I highly recommend) and as we're cruising down the Detroit expressway I notice a sign...no not quite a sign much larger.... more like a billboard.....actually it was a billboard that had about five foot tall letters in black and red and gold relay this message to all the passers-by (mind you I don't make this stuff up):
WHO'S THE FATHER?
1-800-DNA-TYPE
...on American TV, cell phones, fast food...
Now to go along with this experience I watched about 5 minutes of a T.V. show that I couldn't believe existed. Now I must admit I didn't know it existed until a fellow co-worker suggested I watch it. Perhaps you've heard of it...the Jerry Springer Show? This is the epitome of American Violence and Stupidity at its finest for entertainment. Let me clue you in if you've never seen this show. We have guest on the show that have done something really stupid like sleep with another man while married, or men that date prostitutes hoping they'll give up their profession. Now as we set the stage the originator of the conflict come out on the stage and invites the unsuspecting innocent to join them. There on national television they explain how they've been cheating and stealing or any number of other unethical practices. Embarrassing the unsuspecting innocent on national television and in front of a live audience. However it gets better. Then bring the object of embarrassment onto the stage after commercial break of course in order to watch them fight it out but without Don King, boxing gloves and a million dollar purse at the end. My kinda real entertainment. And all of this at the low low cost of cable. Which I hear if you sign over your first born they'll throw in HBO.
But enough of that sillyness I need to share with you my own stupidity. The CAR-CELLULAR PHONE INCIDENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So I'm new to cellulars right? I think they're really cool and all so I start talking with me mother as I'm driving. Not a good idea. DO they have laws against that? She's trying to give me directions to a place as I'm driving, listening, watching, and trying not to end up in the trunk of the car in front of me. Way to much stimulus at once for me. It was more like a Mr. Toad's Wildride sensory overload for me then it was a good time. I use cellular phones while stopped or standing until I build up that American ability to filter out all of the sensory input that beats at us all day long.
Finally, I'd like to just God Bless America for fast food delivery and preparation. In Africa the quickest fastfood meal I ever got from my mamma was about 2 hours. Here instant gratification! Wonderful. Food Food Food. And the incredible thing about food and phones. You can call food and it'll come running. You can even call food in your car on the phone, but I wouldn't advise it. You could even probably eat while driving and talking on the phone but that would be way over my head at the moment. I may need several months of training for that feat. However I don't deny the millions everyday who do it without getting killed. That's the truly amazing part. I also love the variety of meals here in the states. People are so picky...oh I don't eat that. Why I wonder? Is it because there's so much variety, they're allergic or because they just picky? All I can say is I was picky when I left this country and now I eat everything. After an elephant burger, monkey in red sauce, or palm grubs, you sure appreciate anything that's served to you non-moving, without the skin, and head.