Drabble - "Her Gift"
This was just something that came to me suddenly a bit earlier this evening. Can you believe it. It's actually a drabble. Wow...my first. And trust me, you'd better be thankful it's just a drabble.
Title: Her gift
Characters: implied H/G
Word Count: 484 (told you...drabble)
Summary: She always had so much to give him. More than he ever knew.
A/N: This is completely unbeta'd, so all messiness is my own. Fair warning...you may need tissues.
Her Gift
I swore to myself that life would never get to this point. I was supposed to take things one day at a time. I wouldn’t lose my way. I wouldn’t forget how to live. …I wouldn’t be afraid to.
Every day is just one moving slowly after another, inching away. It’s one more day gone.
I feel like I’m wandering aimlessly, desperately losing my life to lies and persuasions of my own doing, grasping for any sign of hope that I won’t lose everything.
My health, my life, my sanity…I’m okay with losing those. But losing her memory, I hope and pray that I never lose that, no matter how much I’d be willing to give just to forget how much I miss her. Even if it was the only way to help me live again, I know that living without her isn’t really living at all.
She wasn’t supposed to make a mistake. She wasn’t supposed to leave her imprint on my heart. She wasn’t supposed to find her way into my soul. She wasn’t supposed to love me so much that she’d give her life to save mine.
She shouldn’t have. She knew that I wouldn’t forgive her for it. She knew that … I would’ve sold my soul for love - for her love. She knew that. And now, I feel like a fool since I lost that piece of my heart.
What I wouldn’t give to remember her touch. What I wouldn’t give to wrap her in my arms again where I could hear heart beating and feel her breath on my skin.
I wanted all those moments where the world was right. Where I held her and kissed her and gave her every single ounce of my love each and every moment for the rest of my life. And I’ll never have that opportunity again.
Yet people try to make everything seem okay. I’m tired of them saying it’ll be all right tomorrow …because it won’t. It’ll never be all right again. When I wake up, I’ll still be here with battles left to face and a heart left to mend. I’ll long to hear her voice and have her love. I’ll be here with only figments of her life. Without her.
If she were here now, I know what she’d say. She would tell me that I don’t give enough credit to my heart. But without her, I never would’ve learned how. She taught me how to love and be loved. Passionately, freely, wholly. She taught me gentleness and understanding. She gave me peace.
But one day when I somehow find words within me, when I can gain the courage to live again, that’s when all will be forgotten. Not her memory or her love, but the tears and the sleepless nights and the heartache and the loneliness.
That’s the day that I’ll learn to carry her with me.
~^~^~
Please be kind and try not to kill me.
Title: Her gift
Characters: implied H/G
Word Count: 484 (told you...drabble)
Summary: She always had so much to give him. More than he ever knew.
A/N: This is completely unbeta'd, so all messiness is my own. Fair warning...you may need tissues.
Her Gift
I swore to myself that life would never get to this point. I was supposed to take things one day at a time. I wouldn’t lose my way. I wouldn’t forget how to live. …I wouldn’t be afraid to.
Every day is just one moving slowly after another, inching away. It’s one more day gone.
I feel like I’m wandering aimlessly, desperately losing my life to lies and persuasions of my own doing, grasping for any sign of hope that I won’t lose everything.
My health, my life, my sanity…I’m okay with losing those. But losing her memory, I hope and pray that I never lose that, no matter how much I’d be willing to give just to forget how much I miss her. Even if it was the only way to help me live again, I know that living without her isn’t really living at all.
She wasn’t supposed to make a mistake. She wasn’t supposed to leave her imprint on my heart. She wasn’t supposed to find her way into my soul. She wasn’t supposed to love me so much that she’d give her life to save mine.
She shouldn’t have. She knew that I wouldn’t forgive her for it. She knew that … I would’ve sold my soul for love - for her love. She knew that. And now, I feel like a fool since I lost that piece of my heart.
What I wouldn’t give to remember her touch. What I wouldn’t give to wrap her in my arms again where I could hear heart beating and feel her breath on my skin.
I wanted all those moments where the world was right. Where I held her and kissed her and gave her every single ounce of my love each and every moment for the rest of my life. And I’ll never have that opportunity again.
Yet people try to make everything seem okay. I’m tired of them saying it’ll be all right tomorrow …because it won’t. It’ll never be all right again. When I wake up, I’ll still be here with battles left to face and a heart left to mend. I’ll long to hear her voice and have her love. I’ll be here with only figments of her life. Without her.
If she were here now, I know what she’d say. She would tell me that I don’t give enough credit to my heart. But without her, I never would’ve learned how. She taught me how to love and be loved. Passionately, freely, wholly. She taught me gentleness and understanding. She gave me peace.
But one day when I somehow find words within me, when I can gain the courage to live again, that’s when all will be forgotten. Not her memory or her love, but the tears and the sleepless nights and the heartache and the loneliness.
That’s the day that I’ll learn to carry her with me.
~^~^~
Please be kind and try not to kill me.