Wanting to appear more often
My midterm is long over (I did pretty well), but now my first essay is upon me. I've procrastinated like hell (I've slept 3 times as much this week as usual, including about 18 hours in one day) just to avoid it, or at least get to the point of desperation where I'm glad to get anything written. It doesn't make it any easier that I have another essay due right after this one, or that I'm changing jobs at the moment, or any of the other excuses I could come up with to explain my slack work ethics of late. Deep down I seem to know it will get done, but there's always that fear of 'what if it doesn't?' And maybe that's what I need to get me going sometimes. I guess I just don't like uncertainty: I know point A (nothing written yet) and point B (done and handed in), but that void between the two can seem so daunting, overwhelming. But what can you do? Things are the way they are, and soon enough I'll be done essays for a while.
Otherwise, my life is entering a new stage. Can't quite explain it yet, but after almost 2 months of harrassing work, I'm going back to my old job, which seems like fun compared to the last one. More physical labour, but that's also a good thing, since I'm trying to get out to the gym again after a few years' absence. I miss that feeling of a 'good hurt', having your muscles torn in order to grow bigger and stronger. However, I'm still concerned about my job prospects for the future. I mean, I want to get my career started soon, but where to begin? I could put it off for a bit longer, maybe a year, but then I'll be getting desperate. This year I plan to graduate, pay off outstanding debts, and then what? Maybe travel again, if I have any money saved; otherwise I should get into whatever I'll be doing for a living for the next X years. Here we are, back at the uncertainty between points A and B again; funny how these themes keep presenting themselves at different levels in my life...
Ok, back to my essay. Don't wish me luck (you know why).
Otherwise, my life is entering a new stage. Can't quite explain it yet, but after almost 2 months of harrassing work, I'm going back to my old job, which seems like fun compared to the last one. More physical labour, but that's also a good thing, since I'm trying to get out to the gym again after a few years' absence. I miss that feeling of a 'good hurt', having your muscles torn in order to grow bigger and stronger. However, I'm still concerned about my job prospects for the future. I mean, I want to get my career started soon, but where to begin? I could put it off for a bit longer, maybe a year, but then I'll be getting desperate. This year I plan to graduate, pay off outstanding debts, and then what? Maybe travel again, if I have any money saved; otherwise I should get into whatever I'll be doing for a living for the next X years. Here we are, back at the uncertainty between points A and B again; funny how these themes keep presenting themselves at different levels in my life...
Ok, back to my essay. Don't wish me luck (you know why).