[Fic] Empty
So I finally got inspiration to write something for the USUK Summer Camp.
Title: Empty
Characters/Pairing: USUK, Japan
Rating/Warnings: PG, AU
Summary: Alfred wakes up one morning feeling like he's missing something important. And why does he keep thinking about this green eyed stranger?
The sun hit Alfred’s eyes that morning. He turned over and tried to ignore it, wanting to go back to sleep; he’d been having such a good dream. Unconsciously he shifted closer to the warmth on the other side of the bed.
And that’s when Alfred woke up. Because there wasn’t anyone on the other side of the bed, there never had been. He was he lived alone, had for the past five years, and he was single, so it shouldn’t be surprising that he woke up in bed by himself.
Still, for a brief moment he’d thought for sure that someone was supposed to be there with him, and now that there wasn’t, he felt sort of empty inside. Like there was this big part of him that was missing.
Strange.
Alfred concluded that it must have just been aftereffects from his dream, got out of bed, and went about his day.
-
“We can figure this out, work around it somehow. You don’t have to do this.”
“I, I have to Alfred. You must understand its better this way. For everyone, especially you.”
“For me? What about you? What about us?”
“Alfred…”
-
“Alfred?”
Alfred was snapped out of his thoughts. His head snapped up to the source of the voice, his friend Kiku, who he was supposed to be eating lunch with, but his mind had been drifting all over the place since this morning, “Sorry Kiku, what did you say?”
Concern filled Kiku’s eyes as he asked, “Is everything alright? You seem a bit distracted today.”
“I’m fine,” he closed his eyes and was assaulted by visions of green eyes, thick eyebrows, and a soft smile whispering his name, “I just had a weird dream last night.”
“Do you want to talk about it?” Kiku ask as he took as sip of his tea and carefully set it down on the table, “Dreams are often our subconscious’s way of giving us important messages. Perhaps if you talk about it, you can figure out what yours is trying to say.”
Alfred laughed, but it sounded hollow even to him, “It’s fine. I’m fine. I don’t even remember the dream; it’s just been bugging me.”
“I see,” Kiku closed his eyes and took another sip of tea.
For a second, Alfred thought he was someone else - green eyes, thick eyebrows, a soft smile (but not in public, never in public, that smile was just for him) - but it only lasted a moment and was gone in an instant.
“Kiku, do you ever feel like something is missing? Like there’s this great, important part of you that you’re forgetting about?”
“I cannot say that I have,” he opened his eyes, looking straight at Alfred, and set his cup down again, “Why do you ask?”
The green eyes danced around in his head, and that empty feeling grew, “No reason.”
-
“Are you going to do it again?”
“Don’t give me that look, Alfred, you know I don’t have a choice.”
“You always have a choice. You can stay with me.”
“I, I can’t. Not yet. Someday, I promise, but I still have things to do.”
“It hurts. Every time you leave it hurts.”
“Don’t fret, love. By this time tomorrow you won’t even remember.”
“I know. But it’ll still hurt.”
-
Alfred had been feeling strangely empty for a month when he first saw him.
He was sitting on a park bench, reading book, looking for all the world looking like any other average person in the city. But something about him was different. Alfred couldn’t put it to words if he tried, but something drew him to the green eyed man sitting on a bench reading his book, and suddenly he had a burning desire to get to know him, or at the very least, learn his name.
“Is anyone sitting here?” he asked.
The man jumped about a foot in the air and glared at Alfred as if he was getting ready to tell him off, but suddenly as he got a good look at Alfred, his face went pale and he shook his head quickly, eyes darting back to the book.
“Cool,” Alfred plopped down on the bench next to him. The man scooted away, but Alfred was determined, and a determined Alfred usually got what he came for, “I’m Alfred, by the way, Alfred Jones.”
The man nodded in acknowledgment but kept his eyes on his book.
Alfred frowned and leaned his head back on the bench, “Nice weather we’re having today, don’t you think?”
The man shrugged, but his eyes darted away from his book to Alfred. Alfred offered him a friendly smile, but that only made his cheeks color and look back at his book again.
“Have we met before?” Alfred asked, “Because you seem kinda familiar.”
“You must be mistaken. We have never met,” the man closed his eyes and inhaled sharply through his nose. After a moment he shut his book, shoving it in his bag as he stood up, “I’m sorry, I’ve things to do and must be off.”
“Oh, you’re British?” the man turned and gave him a panicked look, “Relax, I don’t care. Well, I think it’s kinda cool, I don’t get to meet British people very often, but I’m not going to hold it against you or anything if that’s what you’re worried about.”
“It’s not,” he started, but stopped himself, “I’m very busy, Alfred, was it? I’ve things to do and I can’t, I’ve got to go.”
“It’s fine,” Alfred smiled, the man looked away, “I’m sure you’ve got more important things to do than chat with me. Can I get your name at least?”
“My name is of no consequence,” he tightened his jaw and gave him a stiff nod, “Good day, Alfred.”And with that he was gone.
Alfred sighed and looked up at the clouds. It took him a while to realize that throughout the entire conversation, he hadn’t felt empty.
-
“Why do you keep coming back?”
“I’m sorry?”
“If you’re just going to leave again, why do you bother coming back?”
“Alfred…”
“If your mission is so damn important, why don’t you just leave me alone and let me live the rest of my life in peace?”
“I can’t.”
“Why the hell not?”
“Because I hurt too.”
-
“I’m starting to think you’re stalking me,” the man, whose name still managed to elude him despite this being their sixth meeting, said.
“I take this train all the time,” Alfred smiled as subway slowed down at another stop. More passengers got out, but the green eyed man stayed, “I’m surprised you haven’t noticed me before.”
“This isn’t my normal train,” he admitted as they started moving again, “I missed the first one.”
“Maybe you should miss it more,” Alfred suggested.
The man smiled back, although it didn’t quite reach his eyes, “Maybe.”
They sat next to each other in silence for two more stops before the green eyed man stood up, “This is my stop.”
“Can I get a name this time?”
His mouth twitched as he ducked out of the subway door, “Not yet.”
-
“Alfred?”
“Yes?”
“This is all to protect you, you know.”
“Uh-huh.”
“You know I love you right?”
“Would it kill you to say it more?”
“Maybe.”
“Well, how about saying it to me once in a while when I can actually remember it.”
“Alfred, I love you. Whether you remember it or not, that will never change.”
“I love you too, Arthur.”
-
“Alfred?”
Alfred woke up in an unfamiliar bed in an unfamiliar room next to a very familiar face. He was in a hotel room, and Arthur was sitting in a chair next to his bed, hand grabbing his arm.
“You passed out in the middle of the street,” Arthur explained as Alfred sat up and looked around the room. It was a nice room this time, king sized bed, decent view of the city, much better than that dump they had him in last time, “I didn’t want to cause a scene, so I just brought you back to my hotel room, but I haven’t-”
“Arthur,” Arthur’s grip on his arm tightened as Alfred smiled, “It’s good to see you again.”
“How long-”
“Just now, actually,” he laughed and grabbed Arthur’s hand, “It feels silly that it took this long, but it always does,” he lifted the hand to his mouth and kissed the knuckles, “I missed you.”
“And I you,” Arthur leaned forward and touched his cheek, “You remember everything?”
“Yeah,” he sighed and leaned back down on the bed, gently tugging at Arthur’s hand until he joined him, “I remember everything.”
“So,” Arthur cleared his throat, “You remember that, when I leave I’ll have to-”
“Yeah yeah, the flashy light thing and then I forget you ever existed. Company policy and all that,” Alfred rolled onto his side so he was facing him, and Arthur did the same, “We can worry about that later. I finally have you back, so let’s just enjoy the now.”
Arthur’s smile was genuine, the first in a while, as he closed the distance between them, whispering, “Let’s,” against his lips before finally bringing him into a kiss.
-
Alfred woke up that morning with the sun in his eyes and an empty bed, and although that’s how he’d always woken up every day before, for some reason today it left him feeling empty.
Title: Empty
Characters/Pairing: USUK, Japan
Rating/Warnings: PG, AU
Summary: Alfred wakes up one morning feeling like he's missing something important. And why does he keep thinking about this green eyed stranger?
The sun hit Alfred’s eyes that morning. He turned over and tried to ignore it, wanting to go back to sleep; he’d been having such a good dream. Unconsciously he shifted closer to the warmth on the other side of the bed.
And that’s when Alfred woke up. Because there wasn’t anyone on the other side of the bed, there never had been. He was he lived alone, had for the past five years, and he was single, so it shouldn’t be surprising that he woke up in bed by himself.
Still, for a brief moment he’d thought for sure that someone was supposed to be there with him, and now that there wasn’t, he felt sort of empty inside. Like there was this big part of him that was missing.
Strange.
Alfred concluded that it must have just been aftereffects from his dream, got out of bed, and went about his day.
-
“We can figure this out, work around it somehow. You don’t have to do this.”
“I, I have to Alfred. You must understand its better this way. For everyone, especially you.”
“For me? What about you? What about us?”
“Alfred…”
-
“Alfred?”
Alfred was snapped out of his thoughts. His head snapped up to the source of the voice, his friend Kiku, who he was supposed to be eating lunch with, but his mind had been drifting all over the place since this morning, “Sorry Kiku, what did you say?”
Concern filled Kiku’s eyes as he asked, “Is everything alright? You seem a bit distracted today.”
“I’m fine,” he closed his eyes and was assaulted by visions of green eyes, thick eyebrows, and a soft smile whispering his name, “I just had a weird dream last night.”
“Do you want to talk about it?” Kiku ask as he took as sip of his tea and carefully set it down on the table, “Dreams are often our subconscious’s way of giving us important messages. Perhaps if you talk about it, you can figure out what yours is trying to say.”
Alfred laughed, but it sounded hollow even to him, “It’s fine. I’m fine. I don’t even remember the dream; it’s just been bugging me.”
“I see,” Kiku closed his eyes and took another sip of tea.
For a second, Alfred thought he was someone else - green eyes, thick eyebrows, a soft smile (but not in public, never in public, that smile was just for him) - but it only lasted a moment and was gone in an instant.
“Kiku, do you ever feel like something is missing? Like there’s this great, important part of you that you’re forgetting about?”
“I cannot say that I have,” he opened his eyes, looking straight at Alfred, and set his cup down again, “Why do you ask?”
The green eyes danced around in his head, and that empty feeling grew, “No reason.”
-
“Are you going to do it again?”
“Don’t give me that look, Alfred, you know I don’t have a choice.”
“You always have a choice. You can stay with me.”
“I, I can’t. Not yet. Someday, I promise, but I still have things to do.”
“It hurts. Every time you leave it hurts.”
“Don’t fret, love. By this time tomorrow you won’t even remember.”
“I know. But it’ll still hurt.”
-
Alfred had been feeling strangely empty for a month when he first saw him.
He was sitting on a park bench, reading book, looking for all the world looking like any other average person in the city. But something about him was different. Alfred couldn’t put it to words if he tried, but something drew him to the green eyed man sitting on a bench reading his book, and suddenly he had a burning desire to get to know him, or at the very least, learn his name.
“Is anyone sitting here?” he asked.
The man jumped about a foot in the air and glared at Alfred as if he was getting ready to tell him off, but suddenly as he got a good look at Alfred, his face went pale and he shook his head quickly, eyes darting back to the book.
“Cool,” Alfred plopped down on the bench next to him. The man scooted away, but Alfred was determined, and a determined Alfred usually got what he came for, “I’m Alfred, by the way, Alfred Jones.”
The man nodded in acknowledgment but kept his eyes on his book.
Alfred frowned and leaned his head back on the bench, “Nice weather we’re having today, don’t you think?”
The man shrugged, but his eyes darted away from his book to Alfred. Alfred offered him a friendly smile, but that only made his cheeks color and look back at his book again.
“Have we met before?” Alfred asked, “Because you seem kinda familiar.”
“You must be mistaken. We have never met,” the man closed his eyes and inhaled sharply through his nose. After a moment he shut his book, shoving it in his bag as he stood up, “I’m sorry, I’ve things to do and must be off.”
“Oh, you’re British?” the man turned and gave him a panicked look, “Relax, I don’t care. Well, I think it’s kinda cool, I don’t get to meet British people very often, but I’m not going to hold it against you or anything if that’s what you’re worried about.”
“It’s not,” he started, but stopped himself, “I’m very busy, Alfred, was it? I’ve things to do and I can’t, I’ve got to go.”
“It’s fine,” Alfred smiled, the man looked away, “I’m sure you’ve got more important things to do than chat with me. Can I get your name at least?”
“My name is of no consequence,” he tightened his jaw and gave him a stiff nod, “Good day, Alfred.”And with that he was gone.
Alfred sighed and looked up at the clouds. It took him a while to realize that throughout the entire conversation, he hadn’t felt empty.
-
“Why do you keep coming back?”
“I’m sorry?”
“If you’re just going to leave again, why do you bother coming back?”
“Alfred…”
“If your mission is so damn important, why don’t you just leave me alone and let me live the rest of my life in peace?”
“I can’t.”
“Why the hell not?”
“Because I hurt too.”
-
“I’m starting to think you’re stalking me,” the man, whose name still managed to elude him despite this being their sixth meeting, said.
“I take this train all the time,” Alfred smiled as subway slowed down at another stop. More passengers got out, but the green eyed man stayed, “I’m surprised you haven’t noticed me before.”
“This isn’t my normal train,” he admitted as they started moving again, “I missed the first one.”
“Maybe you should miss it more,” Alfred suggested.
The man smiled back, although it didn’t quite reach his eyes, “Maybe.”
They sat next to each other in silence for two more stops before the green eyed man stood up, “This is my stop.”
“Can I get a name this time?”
His mouth twitched as he ducked out of the subway door, “Not yet.”
-
“Alfred?”
“Yes?”
“This is all to protect you, you know.”
“Uh-huh.”
“You know I love you right?”
“Would it kill you to say it more?”
“Maybe.”
“Well, how about saying it to me once in a while when I can actually remember it.”
“Alfred, I love you. Whether you remember it or not, that will never change.”
“I love you too, Arthur.”
-
“Alfred?”
Alfred woke up in an unfamiliar bed in an unfamiliar room next to a very familiar face. He was in a hotel room, and Arthur was sitting in a chair next to his bed, hand grabbing his arm.
“You passed out in the middle of the street,” Arthur explained as Alfred sat up and looked around the room. It was a nice room this time, king sized bed, decent view of the city, much better than that dump they had him in last time, “I didn’t want to cause a scene, so I just brought you back to my hotel room, but I haven’t-”
“Arthur,” Arthur’s grip on his arm tightened as Alfred smiled, “It’s good to see you again.”
“How long-”
“Just now, actually,” he laughed and grabbed Arthur’s hand, “It feels silly that it took this long, but it always does,” he lifted the hand to his mouth and kissed the knuckles, “I missed you.”
“And I you,” Arthur leaned forward and touched his cheek, “You remember everything?”
“Yeah,” he sighed and leaned back down on the bed, gently tugging at Arthur’s hand until he joined him, “I remember everything.”
“So,” Arthur cleared his throat, “You remember that, when I leave I’ll have to-”
“Yeah yeah, the flashy light thing and then I forget you ever existed. Company policy and all that,” Alfred rolled onto his side so he was facing him, and Arthur did the same, “We can worry about that later. I finally have you back, so let’s just enjoy the now.”
Arthur’s smile was genuine, the first in a while, as he closed the distance between them, whispering, “Let’s,” against his lips before finally bringing him into a kiss.
-
Alfred woke up that morning with the sun in his eyes and an empty bed, and although that’s how he’d always woken up every day before, for some reason today it left him feeling empty.