Title: School Play
Characters/Pairings: USUK, Belarus->America, Belarus->Russia, Greece, Japan/Taiwan, Poland, Lithuania, Estonia, Latvia, Italy, Germany, Romano, Spain, Switzerland, Prussia, Liechtenstein, France, Denmark, Norway.
Rating/Warnings: PG, high school AU.
Summary: In order to save the theater program, student council president Arthur Kirkland needs to put on the greatest performance of Romeo and Juliet ever. With star athlete Alfred Jones as his Romeo, as well as a cast trying to drive him insane, this will not be easy.
Arthur sighed as he glanced down the list of girls left to audition. There were only about six more. He could do this…he could do this…
It wasn’t like Juliet was a pivotal role or anything…except for the fact that, you know, it was. Kiku, Mr. Karpusi, and most of the girls had complained that he was being too picky about whom he wanted for this role, but it was an important role! If they couldn’t cast just the right Juliet the entire performance would be a flop, and if that happened, well, no more drama club, and if that happened than this school would lose what little culture it still had left.
The school was cutting their budget, again, and as usually the first thing on the cutting board was the arts, which is a shame, because that’s what this school needs more of, not less. The music program was saved by the band director’s passion (and his wife, who can be very scary sometimes), but the theater program fell a little short in that department. It wasn’t that the head of the drama club, Heracles Karpusi, didn’t like theater, he just didn’t show it all the time. He was more of a ‘go-with-the-flow’ kind of guy, insisting if they cut the program, then the cut the program.
So as student council president, Arthur had intervened, and made a deal with the board that if they could get a large enough turn out with their next performance, then the theater program would stay. Mr. Karpusi let Arthur be the director, as he had made saving the theater his new project, and Kiku, the vice president, be his assistant. He had selected Romeo and Juliet, a beloved classic and one of his personal favorites, as their performance. Now all he needed was to find the right cast.
“Thanks,” he said to the student on stage, “but, um, that’s not what we’re looking for, seeing as Romeo and Juliet is not a musical…and you’re a guy, Feliks. Juliet is a girl. You’re free to try out for Romeo in a few minutes…”
“Like, weren’t all the actors male in Shakespeare’s time anyway?”
Arthur felt his smile strain, “This is still not a musical, and even if it was, you can’t sing. Next!”
Feliks huffed off the stage to be replaced by Natalia Braginski. Arthur remembered overhearing she was only doing this because her brother asked her to, probably to get her away from him for even the short amount of time the audition took up.
This ought to be good…
As it turned out, she was good. Very good, as in, exactly what Arthur wanted in his Juliet. She had just the right amount of passion for her love, portrayed just the right amount of naivety, and the death scene, oh the death scene. It was brilliant. She was brilliant, and he needed her in his play.
“Yes! You! You’re it! You’re my Juliet!” he exclaimed when she was done. Kiku and Mr. Karpusi nodded in agreement, thrilled by the fact Arthur had found someone to live up to his expectations.
Natalia crossed her arms and looked away. “I only auditioned because my brother asked me to. I don’t really want the part.”
“Is there anything I can do to change your mind?” Arthur asked, desperate, “You can pick who plays Romeo. Will that do?”
“I want my brother to play Romeo.”
Arthur looked at his colleges. Kiku was shaking his head ferociously and Mr. Karpusi had gone so far as to bang his against the table. Ivan, who was sitting in the back, not too far away, was shaking his head and waving his arms about.
“Ivan…isn’t really made for the stage, love. Is there anybody else you’d have instead? Anyone at all?”
Natalia thought about it for a moment, “There is one other person…”
***
Out of all the males in the school, she had to pick him, Mr. Everybody-Look-At-Me-Because-I’m-Just-So-Perfect. Anyone else Arthur would have been able to deal with (except maybe that French bastard, but that was another story), but no, she had to give him the option of either recruiting star athlete Alfred F. Jones to play his Romeo or to just not have the production at all and subsequently lose the theater program forever. He’s not sure what he did in his past life to deserve this, but it must have been horrible.
Arthur and Kiku were able to corner Alfred after classes the next day to ask him.
“You want me to what now?”
“We want you to play Romeo in the upcoming school play,” Arthur told him, again, tapping his foot impatiently, “so will you or not?”
“I don’t really want this to turn into some High School Musical thing…”
“What on earth is… no never mind, I don’t want to know. Romeo and Juliet is not a musical; I don’t know where everyone is getting the idea that it is.”
“Well that’s good, ‘cause I can’t sing, but, well…aren’t theater kids supposed to be gay?”
Arthur saw red; it was such a stupid stereotype. Admittedly, Arthur himself was not entirely straight, but really, that didn’t mean anything…and besides, he didn’t represent the whole theater community. Kiku was seeing that new exchange student from Taiwan wasn’t he? Yes, he was straight, and he was into the theater as well. Stupid stereotypes.
“Well fine! If you don’t want to help us out then don’t! It’s not like we need you anyway…I can find plenty of people to play Romeo!” He turned around and stormed off.
“But Arthur-san,” Kiku called after him, “Natalia-san said she would only be Juliet if Alfred-san was Romeo.”
Ah yes, there was that…Arthur stopped in his tracks. “She also said she’d do it if Ivan was Romeo…we can work with that.”
“Arthur-san…”
“Are you crazy?!” Alfred shouted, “Ivan can’t act to save his life! You’ll only destroy whatever chances of saving the theater if you do that, no matter how good Natalia is.”
“Well it’s not like you’re giving me much of a choice!”
“Hey, I never said I wouldn’t do it, I was just wondering is all.”
“So, you’ll do it?” Arthur confirmed.
“Well, I’d have to work rehearsal time around baseball practice, but yeah, I’ll do it. Saving the theater department is a job for a hero after all!”
“I don’t need you to save the theater at this god-forsaken school…it’s just easier this way is all.”
“Actually, with Alfred-san’s popularity, more students will probably want to come, whether the show is actually good or not.”
“Ahaha, I’m such a good hero. You should thank me by buying me lunch.”
“Th-that’s not part of the deal!” Arthur handed him a script with all of Romeo’s lines highlighted, “There’s your script. The first rehearsal is tomorrow after school. You don’t have to know all of your lines by then, but at least read through the play alright?”
“Yeah sure, this is the one where the guy and girl fall in love and then kill themselves right?” he asked nonchalantly while flipping through the script.
“It’s far more complicated than that!”
“But I get to stab Tybalt right? And Paris? Sweet!”
“This is primarily a love story you know.”
“Yeah yeah, of course Shorty, I got it.”
“I’m not that short!”
“I’ve got to go to practice now, but I’ll see you guys tomorrow!” He waved and ran off towards the fields.
“Why do I feel a certain doom looming over my head?”
“Cheer up Arthur-san, it won’t be that bad.”
***
It was a mess, and Alfred was still at practice.
Juliet, as it turned out, was quite the little diva and insisted that her brother watch the rehearsals. Ivan spent most of the time bothering Benvolio, who was trying his very best to ignore him, brave lad. Friar Lawrence and Friar John were trying their best to help him out anyway they could without getting too close. Mercutio kept demanding pasta and flirting with Tybalt, who was trying not to get killed by Balthasar, who was being chased around by Gregory. Lord Montague had brought out his gun because apparently Sampson was looking at Lady Montague funny, and Sampson wasn’t helping by declaring his ‘awesome’ all over the place. Lord Capulet was bothering the hell out of the Nurse, who was playing cards with Peter. Abraham was flirting with the apothecary, who was trying very hard to control himself and not punch him in the face, and Paris had already tried to grope him three times in the past ten minutes. Prince Escalus was, well, actually sitting by him calmly drinking tea…but he was doing so with Lady Capulet, so, yeah.
“Everybody quiet!” Arthur shouted. Everyone stopped whatever they were doing to look at him. “Alright, now Ivan, go sit in the back and stop disturbing the performers! Everyone else, let’s see how much he can get through without Romeo.”
“I vote we start with the Tybalt death scene!” Balthasar volunteered, “Or the Gregory and Sampson death scene. Either one works.”
“Gregory and Sampson don’t have a death scene. In fact they only have one scene. And we can’t do the Tybalt death scene without Romeo.”
“Wait, I only have one scene?” Sampson asked, “How is the world supposed to know my awesome if I’m only in one scene!”
“You’ll be playing some of the extras in other scenes as well, so just deal with it!”
“Ve, can we do the party scene?” Mercutio asked, “I’m really hungry…”
“You won’t be eating during the party scene, and we need Romeo for that too!”
“Let’s do the fight scene!” Abraham suggested, “I wanna beat up some guys!”
“Of course you do Mathis…” the apothecary sighed before pulling out some books, “My scene has Romeo in it right? I’m just going to do my homework until he gets here then.”
“Very well Nikolas, you can do that.”
“The Nurse is a girl right?” the Nurse asked, “why am I playing a girl?”
“Because we ran out of girls and you’re the closest we have, Yao. Besides, in Shakespeare’s time all the actors were male. You’re just being authentic is all…”
“Exactly!” Lord Capulet agreed, “And I say we do the scene where Lord Capulet makes out with the Nurse!”
“There’s no such scene in the play!”
“But Yao, your breasts are mine right?”
“Ve! Yao has breasts!” Mercutio shouted and tugged on Tybalt’s arm, “I didn’t know, Ludwig! I didn’t know Yao was a girl!”
“Damnit you idiot, Yong Soo just being weird again!” Balthasar shouted.
“Lovino you’re so cute when you’re angry!” Gregory shouted as he pulled Balthasar into a hug.
“Damnit get away from me bastard!”
Arthur sighed; there was just no winning with this bunch.
“Hey you guys!” Romeo shouted as he finally showed up, still in his practice gear, “What did I miss?” he plopped his bag down and sat next to Arthur.
“Not much I’m afraid, Alfred-san,” Prince Escalus said, “Arthur-san is having some trouble getting everyone to behave.”
“Really? Well that’s not too hard,” he stood up and gave a sharp whistle, getting everyone’s attention, “C’mon guys and gals, we’ve got a play to put on! Let’s listen to Arthur and get this show on the road, okay? Now what scene were we working on?”
“Tybalt’s death scene!”
“Why don’t we do Balthasar’s death scene since he keeps volunteering it…”
“Balthasar doesn’t have a death scene! Stupid potato bastard, you’re trying to kill me off!”
“Let’s do the balcony scene,” Juliet suggested, “Now that Romeo is here.”
“Or we can do Tybalt’s death scene…” Romeo seconded.
“We’re doing - Damnit you stupid frog, you grope me one more time and we’ll do Paris’s death scene!”
“Go right ahead, I’m willing to do my part for the two star-crossed lovers of this performance.”
“We’re doing the first scene!” Arthur shouted, “Places everyone!”
***
“Alright,” Arthur said one day during their second week of rehearsal, “We’re starting with the balcony scene today. We need to get it done before Romeo’s game tonight.”
“Finally!” Paris exclaimed, “It’s been two weeks and we’ve been avoiding the good stuff! We haven’t even touched on the death scene, although we’ve done mine and Romeo’s fight often enough…”
“That’s because you’re annoying and I like watching you die. And anyway-”
“Um, Arthur,” Romeo asked quietly, tugging his sleeve, “Can I talk to you for a moment?”
“…Can it wait? We’re in the middle of something.”
“Just, it’ll be quick,” Alfred dragged him off to the side. He stood there, blushing and not looking at Arthur, which really was very rude.
“Well what is it?” He prompted.
“It’s…about the balcony scene. You see, the thing is, uh, I’ve never actually, you know…” he trailed off, face getting even redder if that was possible.
“Are you trying to tell me you’ve never kissed a girl?”
“Um…yes?”
Arthur couldn’t help himself and started laughing.
“Sh-shut up! It’s not funny!”
“On the contrary, it’s quite hilarious. My Romeo hasn’t even had his first kiss yet…is this why you’ve been avoiding the romance scenes?”
“I…shut up…”
“Relax Alfred,” he put a hand on his shoulder, “I wouldn’t have you do anything you didn’t want to. There’s actually no kissing during the balcony scene.”
“Really?” he perked up, “But in all the movies and stuff…”
“Terribly inaccurate. You and Juliet only actually kiss four times in the entire play; twice during the party scene and twice during your death scene.”
“So…there’s still kissing?”
“You don’t actually have to kiss her if you don’t want to. You could do a stage kiss and just pretend to.”
“That makes it seem like I’m lying though…”
“You’re an actor now Alfred, it’s your job to lie for your art.”
“If you put it that way…” he smiled his patented Hollywood smile at the director before bounding onto the stage, “Well c’mon Arty, we’ve got a scene to rehearse!”
“Don’t call me Arty!”
***
By week three, everything was slowly starting to come together, slowly being the key word there. Alfred and his brother Matthew had volunteered to help build the set, which was done by now and looked amazing. Heracles had convinced Mr. Edelstein to let the band be used for background music and various sounds, meaning Arthur didn’t have to settle for a cheesy recording. Feliks, as it turned out, was very good with lights, and Hong, who was playing Peter, Eduard, who was playing Friar Lawrence, and Alfred, were equally good with electronics. The tech part of the production was coming along quite smoothly.
The actors, well, slowly was the key word for a reason.
They all had Paris’s death scene down so well they could all do it in their sleep, mostly due to the fact that they’ve rehearsed that scene at least three times a day. Francis really was that annoying. Antonio and Gilbert refused to take their roles seriously, although they did pull off a rather brilliant fight scene. Lovino kept adding swears to his lines, Feliciano couldn’t get through his monologue without mentioning pasta, Yong Soo kept trying to make the Nurse part of his scenes, Mathis took his fight scene a little too seriously, Raivis had trouble getting over his stage fright despite his minor role, Vash kept bringing his gun and pulling it out at random intervals, and Ludwig refused to show emotion, even when being stabbed.
Alfred and Natalia were the saving graces of the cast. Their chemistry onstage was nothing short of brilliant, to say the least. Although she was upset at first on Alfred’s usage of stage kisses, Natalia was able to fill her role up to Arthur’s ridiculous expectations and then some. As for Alfred, he was a bit over the top, but Romeo was an over the top character and Arthur couldn’t have asked for anyone better to play the part.
“Alfred-san seems to be putting in as much effort as you are for this play,” Kiku commented one day.
“What do you mean by that?”
“Well, he’s doing the set, helping with the lighting, and playing the lead all while still being the starting pitcher and keeping up his grades. Actually, perhaps he’s doing more than you.”
“Directing the play is the hardest job, and I’m still president of the student council and I’ve got my grades to worry about too.”
“Indeed. I was just merely making an observation. Pay me no mind.” He smiled his all knowing smile before heading off to help Mei with her lines.
Before he could even begin to contemplate what Kiku was talking about, Alfred came up behind him and swung an arm around his shoulder.
“Hey, I was thinking, you never did get me that lunch.”
“Lunch was never part of the deal!”
“Anyway, since I don’t have practice or anything after this today, I figured it would be a good time for that. It’s not really lunch, but I’m still hungry.”
“Fine, if you insist.”
“Awesome! Meet me just outside okay?” he smiled at him and ran off to find Juliet.
That pleasant feeling in Arthur’s stomach was completely unrelated to that, and neither was him letting everyone out early that afternoon. They’d all just been working hard and he thought they could use a break is all.
***
Alfred insisted on hamburgers for lunch, and although Arthur complained throughout the whole meal, it was… nice, just eating with him and hanging out outside of the theater. The more he got to know Alfred Jones, the less he hated him. And since Alfred kept insisting they go out to eat every time he didn’t have rehearsal after practice, he was getting to know him quite well.
As such, it really shouldn’t have come as a surprise to him when, while rehearsing the balcony scene and paying extra attention to Alfred’s performance, he realized he didn’t hate him anymore. In fact it was quite the opposite, to the point where he found his mind wandering during classes, thinking about nothing but Alfred.
And every day he had to come in and watch him confess passionate and heartfelt love to Natalia Braginski. Over and over and over again.
He’d started refusing Alfred’s invitations after rehearsals, claiming there was just too much to do a mere two weeks before the play opened, which there was, but the crushed expression on his face as he walked away made something deep inside Arthur twinge with regret. If he was a master at anything, however, it was ignoring his emotions.
The play was going to be over soon anyway. After that, they could go back to politely ignoring each other and only acknowledging the other when necessary. He could hold out until then.
***
It was opening night. Arthur was frantic backstage, double checking with Prince Escalus that everything was in order and that everyone knew what they were doing. The ushers had closed the doors when he realized someone was missing.
“Where the hell is Juliet?”
He and the rest of the cast and crew backstage searched high and low, but there was no sign of Natalia Braginski anywhere in the theater. Just as he was starting to panic, Benvolio got a text from her saying that she had fallen ill and wouldn’t be able to make it to opening night.
That’s when he started panicking.
“We don’t have an understudy for her!” he was pacing now, with several of the cast members trying to calm him down, “Why didn’t I think ahead and get understudies? They play is ruined!”
“Calm down Artie,” a hand landed on his shoulder as he looked up to see Alfred smiling back at him, “It’s not ruined. We just need to find someone else to fill in for Juliet.”
“Who? No one else knows all her lines or where she needs to be and when she needs to be there and-”
“Well, I’m pretty sure you know all of those things, so not quite no one…”
“Me?” Arthur pointed at himself to confirm, “You want me to play Juliet?”
“You are the only person who knows all her lines and stage cues,” Kiku shrugged, “I do not see another option available to us at this time.”
“But… I’m a boy…”
“In Shakespeare’s time all the actors were male,” Yao stated, “You’ll just be authentic.”
“But… I…”
“It’s either you play Juliet or we cancel opening night,” Francis added, “Your choice Arthur.”
Well, if it was put like that, the choice was obvious. He wasn’t about to let this theater program sink just because he would be uncomfortable in a dress.
“Start the play on schedule,” he said as he walked towards the dressing rooms, “Someone… come help me get dressed.”
***
It was going good so far. Granted, they were only five scenes into the play, but there were some very excellent five scenes, if Arthur did say so himself. Not to mention that the house was packed, which meant good news for the theater department if they kept it up for the remainder of their run.
All of those things Arthur would have to think about later, as Alfred was currently standing in front of him, flirting in Shakespearian.
“Thus, from my lips, by yours, my sin is purged,” Alfred finished saying as he stepped closer.
“Then have my lips the sin that they have took,” he said right back.
“Sin from thy lips? Oh trespass sweetly urged,” he placed a hand on Arthur’s arm and filled any space in between them, “Give me my sin again,” and he went in for the kiss.
Only it wasn’t a stage kiss, like he had practiced with Natalia. It was a real kiss, right on Arthur’s lips, and as it turned out, Alfred was a pretty good kisser considering.
Arthur stared at him for a bit before remembering that he was in a play and had a line, “Y-you kiss by the book.”
This was going to be a long night.
***
Alfred had kissed him on the lips for every kiss in the play. Arthur had attributed it to it being opening night, their first real performance, and Alfred being a bit nervous and/or really in character. Yet still there was a nagging feeling deep down inside him that wouldn’t let it go. This nagging feeling is what led him to seek out Alfred at the cast party, pull him away so they’d have more privacy, and start the conversation with, “So I noticed you didn’t do stage kisses.”
Alfred’s face turned red in record time, “Oh, well, y-yeah, I guess I didn’t… sorry about that.”
“It’s alright, just, uh, thought you should know,” this was a pointlessly awkward conversation. Why had he bothered to start it, “Since you were complaining about theater turning you gay.”
“I wasn’t, too worried about that actually,” Alfred shrugged, “It’s just,” he bit his lip and stared at his sneakers as if they were the most fascinating things in the world, “This is going to sound weird and you’re going to punch me, but I kinda like you, like, like you like you, I mean, you’ve just been so passionate about this whole thing it’s hard not to fall for you, but, uh, yeah. So, I’m sorry if I got a bit carried away on stage.”
“It’s alright, I enjoyed it,” Alfred’s eyes shot up to meet his as Arthur’s face went red as well, “I-I mean, passion on stage makes for a more believable performance and-”
“Arthur,” and the boy was looking all shades of hopeful, “Is it possible that you maybe like me like me too?”
“I, what, that’s completely…” he tried to look away, tried to avoid Alfred’s gaze, but he couldn’t possibly lie under it, “correct. Yes. I, well, I suppose I might like you as well.”
“Yeah, but,” Alfred pouted and stepped closer, “do you like me like me?”
“Is there a difference?”
“Between liking someone and like liking someone? Yeah, it’s a huge difference Arthur!”
Instead of answering, Arthur leaned forward and planted his own kiss on Alfred’s lips.
“I like you like that,” he stated as he pulled away, “Do I have to clarify further?”
“No, well, I mean, yeah, you can keep kissing me and stuff, because I like it and you seem to like it too and that’s good, but I understand what you mean by it so-”
Arthur interrupted his rambling, “I’ll take you up on that offer,” and leaned in for another kiss. This time Alfred met him halfway.
His play was brilliant, the theater program was saved until the next round of budget cuts, and he was making out with Alfred F. Jones. Arthur’s life, he realized, was really quite fantastic.