Phrases and sayings that make me poop my pants in anger. part.1
Below are some sayings and phrases that make me want to kill nuns. They all suck(not the nuns).
-"Two Birds in the Bush are Worth one in the Hand"- Hey! My life sucks, I live in a crappy house in a crappy neighborhood, my wife is pregnant with our fifth mutant child, there's not a moment in the day where i'm sober and dont think about just ending it all, all these sores and tumors are killing me. But boy am I happy about my life and don't want something better for myself! Whoever thought of this saying should be shot.
-"It's Always in the last place you look."- Yeah, no shit Sherlock, why the hell would I keep looking after I found it. Who does this? Where are they?
-"Youre never fully dressed without a smile"- Shut up, just shup the hell up. Thats like saying "im a dipshit who deserves to be shot".
-"That's just your opinion"- Ohh Jesus I didnt know that. I only just fucking said it! When i'm done proving one of you assholes wrong, you assholes always say "that's just your opinion" on account of you being a fool, a damned fool and not being able to think of a valid argument.
-"The best things in life are free"- This may be true but some are the worst. No one's cheering when the get a nice batch of The AIDS and the last time it checked your mom's untimley death didnt cost much.
-"You can pick your friends, you can pick you nose but you cant pick you friend's nose"- Im not even sure if this is a real saying but my mom says it sometimes and when she does I feel like shooting cats and Anna Nicole Smith.
-"Bon Jovi is a good band"- It's just not true.
-"You are what you eat."- What the hell is this supposed to mean? What youre saying is that if I eat bacon, im a pig's ass? Whoever started saying this can go to hell.
-"The grass is greener on the other side."- This is the stupidest thing ever because the person with the greener grass is always going to be wondering if the guy next to him has greener grass. I doubt Bill Gates is wondering if Inbreed Jetro Dipshit has it better than him in a trailor. There's always a bottom part of society and those people are suck because theyre poor white trash bastards.
"Im not racist but..."- People usually say this before saying the most racist, evil shit ever. Example-"Im not racist but I think the world would be better without The Jews and the Darkies. If I was really racist i'd go out and gut all groups different from me, but luckily i'm not!" Assholes who say that before saying something racist should just die. Admit that you're racist and dont say that just to seem politically correct. If youre racist youre a stupid asshole but if you say that before saying something racist you should be shot.
That's all for now, im sure i'll think of more phrases and sayings that piss me off beyond sight but in the mean time, go to hell or eat a Zebra Cake. I love myself.
-"Two Birds in the Bush are Worth one in the Hand"- Hey! My life sucks, I live in a crappy house in a crappy neighborhood, my wife is pregnant with our fifth mutant child, there's not a moment in the day where i'm sober and dont think about just ending it all, all these sores and tumors are killing me. But boy am I happy about my life and don't want something better for myself! Whoever thought of this saying should be shot.
-"It's Always in the last place you look."- Yeah, no shit Sherlock, why the hell would I keep looking after I found it. Who does this? Where are they?
-"Youre never fully dressed without a smile"- Shut up, just shup the hell up. Thats like saying "im a dipshit who deserves to be shot".
-"That's just your opinion"- Ohh Jesus I didnt know that. I only just fucking said it! When i'm done proving one of you assholes wrong, you assholes always say "that's just your opinion" on account of you being a fool, a damned fool and not being able to think of a valid argument.
-"The best things in life are free"- This may be true but some are the worst. No one's cheering when the get a nice batch of The AIDS and the last time it checked your mom's untimley death didnt cost much.
-"You can pick your friends, you can pick you nose but you cant pick you friend's nose"- Im not even sure if this is a real saying but my mom says it sometimes and when she does I feel like shooting cats and Anna Nicole Smith.
-"Bon Jovi is a good band"- It's just not true.
-"You are what you eat."- What the hell is this supposed to mean? What youre saying is that if I eat bacon, im a pig's ass? Whoever started saying this can go to hell.
-"The grass is greener on the other side."- This is the stupidest thing ever because the person with the greener grass is always going to be wondering if the guy next to him has greener grass. I doubt Bill Gates is wondering if Inbreed Jetro Dipshit has it better than him in a trailor. There's always a bottom part of society and those people are suck because theyre poor white trash bastards.
"Im not racist but..."- People usually say this before saying the most racist, evil shit ever. Example-"Im not racist but I think the world would be better without The Jews and the Darkies. If I was really racist i'd go out and gut all groups different from me, but luckily i'm not!" Assholes who say that before saying something racist should just die. Admit that you're racist and dont say that just to seem politically correct. If youre racist youre a stupid asshole but if you say that before saying something racist you should be shot.
That's all for now, im sure i'll think of more phrases and sayings that piss me off beyond sight but in the mean time, go to hell or eat a Zebra Cake. I love myself.