Round and Round we go, where we stop I already know...

[fishxnet]

Somebody slap me. I was online last night, and my ex boyfriend from about a year ago told me he loves me. God, please. This man, no this boy, treated me like utter shit for two years. He cheated on me for our entire two year relationship, with many girls. He played countless mind games and even had me paying his bills. Then he left me completely empty and in shambles. I gave him everything I had and he just sucked it all from me and left me there, an empty shell of what I used to be. I had to be put in the ‘hospital’ once again after he left. I was dependant on meth and cutting so badly after he left… so badly. I had to go cold turkey in the hospital, which was absolutely horrible. But I made it through, I made it through and slowly I am picking up the pieces and placing them where they once were. And then he pulls something like this, trying to waltz back into my life, like nothing had ever happened. He expects me to take him back, as if wasting two years of my life and breaking my soul wasn’t enough? He wants to come back for more? My heart felt like a shattered piece in the carpet, there was no way of saving it, there was no point to picking it up, it was the end of it. I can’t believe he’s told me that, once I am finally pulling myself back together, once I am finally trying to get off meth and making some progress he tries to come into my life and push me back down to slave level. I told him to fuck himself. There was a lot of “fuck you’s” and “how dare you’s”. I said, “Once I am finally happy you think you have a right to be in my life again, after all you put me through? Two words for you buddy: Fuck You!” I can’t believe the nerve some people have…I really can’t. At least I didn’t break again, and take him back. I’m trying to be strong, but I feel so alone…
----Sammi