(no subject)
[charmed PRIVATE with the heaviest charms he can]
Letter to Pond Scum (deceased)
Well, fucker, I heard it would've been your birthday today. It's a cryin' shame you're not around for me to harass... and no I wouldn't be giving you any birthday spankings, thank you very much. You know what Pond Scum? It was real shitty of you to go and die like that. Real shitty. All these girls don't know what to do without you. Not to mention me! I was going to have a kick ass year harassing you, wanker, and now look what you've gone and done. I swear if you were alive I'd kick your ass.
All that aside though, I gotta say it's really fucked up that you're gone. People our age just should not die. Its not fucking fair, Pond Scum, you hear that?
Fuck, I don't know. You were the best sparring partner around, okay? I admit it. I actually kind of LIKED you in some fucked up, ass-backward way (not in that way, of course). And I go play with Muggles for a few months and you up and die on me? Well, I don't like it. Not one bit.
What am I supposed to say? Huh? I've already admitted that I liked you. Maybe I miss you a bit, too. Like all those bloody girls. Elanor, Daciana, Gunner, even Jelly misses you I'll bet.
Shit, I'm really bad at stuff like this. Happy Birthday, Pond Scum, you fucker. You're missed.
Letter to Pond Scum (deceased)
Well, fucker, I heard it would've been your birthday today. It's a cryin' shame you're not around for me to harass... and no I wouldn't be giving you any birthday spankings, thank you very much. You know what Pond Scum? It was real shitty of you to go and die like that. Real shitty. All these girls don't know what to do without you. Not to mention me! I was going to have a kick ass year harassing you, wanker, and now look what you've gone and done. I swear if you were alive I'd kick your ass.
All that aside though, I gotta say it's really fucked up that you're gone. People our age just should not die. Its not fucking fair, Pond Scum, you hear that?
Fuck, I don't know. You were the best sparring partner around, okay? I admit it. I actually kind of LIKED you in some fucked up, ass-backward way (not in that way, of course). And I go play with Muggles for a few months and you up and die on me? Well, I don't like it. Not one bit.
What am I supposed to say? Huh? I've already admitted that I liked you. Maybe I miss you a bit, too. Like all those bloody girls. Elanor, Daciana, Gunner, even Jelly misses you I'll bet.
Shit, I'm really bad at stuff like this. Happy Birthday, Pond Scum, you fucker. You're missed.