Tests
So that test was hard. Hard is an understatement; that test was impossible, unless you actually memorized every single page/slide of the notes given to us in class. Which I am fairly sure that no one in the class actually did: every single student was still (frantically) writing at 8:00pm when the professor ordered us to stop and hand in the tests. I saw a lot of blank pages from other people, too, and I heard a lot of disappointed complaining afterwards.
So. I'm not a child who's going to complain about how "totally unfair" the test and teacher(s) was/were just because I did poorly. In fact, I'm grown-up enough to just flat-out say it: of course I didn't know enough to do well on that test.
Is that my fault? Obviously it is, and I'll even say "mostly" because I'm willing to take the responsibility. There was a lot of chemistry-related stuff* that I didn't know, and while I'm sure my background in engineering is showing, I could've taken more time to memorize those particular slides with the chemical structures and formulas. There were some equations I hadn't memorized. There was some other stuff I could've spent time on.
The thing is, I certainly did study for this test. It wasn't like I didn't prepare for it at all.
But the profs didn't prepare us for it either. Obviously, we didn't LEARN enough. I take as my evidence the fact that the entire class did NOT finish the exam within the time given, and pretty much the 80% of the class I ran into on my way out the door was horrified at what they'd just seen. The other 20% were behind me, but I am pretty sure they all looked distraught as well.
At that point? It is not a matter of "the students didn't study enough". It is partially "the teachers did not do a good enough job at TEACHING".
I'm not going to complain about the test just because I did poorly. But at the same time, I am sick and tired of the bullshit attitude that how a college student (or grad student) does in a class is solely the fault of the student.
I am paying YOU money to teach me things. This is an intro-level graduate class. Grad school is supposed to be so much more than "hey just know this shit" - it's supposed to lead to a more personal connection between the student and the department. It leads to personal and interpersonal learning - not just rote recitation of knowledge, but learning. At least, that's the rhetoric.
So I studied concepts. I tried to understand the things that were shown in the class, rather than just memorizing slides. I tried to apply them. Maybe this is because I'm an engineer, by nature, rather than a scientist**. But that's what looked important to me: the class is called "Polymer Concepts", so I made sure I had the concepts down pat. Color me surprised when I look at the test and realize that a whole SHLOAD of the questions were, yes, tiny little details taken directly from the handouts that apparently we were supposed to be able to regurgitate.
And look: when only 1 out of 4*** professors we've had for this class gave us any sort of review sheet, what does that say? 3/4 of the professors don't respect the class enough to even mention the exam. Of course I didn't spend my time memorizing every little detail on the slides. I didn't think it was going to be that kind of test - NO ONE DID - and I didn't get any advice otherwise.
By the way: the one professor who DID give a review sheet? I ACED his portion of the exam, I am fairly sure. He respected me enough to give me some direction, and in return I put in a good deal of work on his section.
I just. This rant isn't even about the test anymore. I'm really tired of the attitude in "higher education" that a professor doesn't have to GIVE anything to the class. Everything's the student's responsibility: studying, memorizing, understanding, asking questions if you don't know (even if you don't know what you're supposed to know and what you're not, since you're not given any sort of guide or even an outline), what what what.
I am not a young, starry-eyed student. I'm not even a grad student who has to tread carefully in their department and suck up doing someone's shit work so that they can tack themselves onto an advisor and get an actual grad project. I am a jaded, cynical adult - I am a professional in the very industry you are teaching - and as I said to Rina this morning, I do not have time for your bullshit.
I think classes should have to go both ways. And I definitely think teachers need to be held accountable for actual teaching.
We - the CLASS - very obviously didn't learn what we were supposed to in this class, for this test.
Should we have tried harder and studied more? OF COURSE.
But I am not a child. I expect more from my professors, too.
- (footnotes) -
*"Chemical Engineering" is kind of a misnomer in that being a chemical engineer really doesn't require a lot of chemistry. Most ChemEs only take basic chemistry, 1-2 semesters of O-Chem, and P-Chem 2 (because P-Chem 1 is all Thermo, and if you're a ChemE you live and breathe Thermodynamics). And honestly P-Chem is less chemistry and more this is how molecules and atoms are built, i.e. "physical chemistry", hence the name.
I run into a lot of people who are like, "Oh, chemical engineering? Man, I was horrible at chemistry." Well, guess what, I was too! ChemE is more about running reactions and reactors, making and finishing product, finding the best and cheapest and most efficient way to run your chemical process, and most importantly making sure shit does not (a) blow up or (b) ruin other shit. It is definitely not about basic chemistry, because if there's anything my life has told me, it's that I suck at basic chemistry.
**Yes, there is a difference. A big one. This is why Engineering is usually a separate College at a University: there's Engineering and Arts&Sciences, and they are very different disciplines.
Much to my dismay, my MS is re-teaching me this lesson in fucking spades.
***This is a whole separate issue. I despise classes taught by more than one professor. The classes become totally disorganized, completely disjointed, and students have to adjust to multiple styles of teaching and testing. In many cases the teachers either overlap subjects, or contradict each other completely in certain things. Anyway, it's one of my main pet peeves about higher education. I think it's very, very difficult to make a multiple-professor class go anything other than poorly.
So, yes, I am going to go drown my sorrows in the Trick or Treat Meme and in Pirate AUs. Be alert, because Pirates may be appearing in your LJs in the future.
[ETA] - I actually didn't realize I'd made a "studying sucks a nut" tag before trying to tag this entry. Sometimes I make myself laugh.
[ETA #2] THIS IS IMPORTANT, GUYS! This week's cockeyed_art challenge is FF characters in Halloween costumes. YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO DO IT, DON'T LIE.