It's time to face the Truth
I’ve broken down twice already in the past 3 months over a situation that cannot be changed. A situation that should have entered my heart and made me realize it’s over for good. But after the second time I broke down, I swore I was not going to return and feel hopeless and despair, yet look at me now…I’m still hopping and still getting hurt more and more. I asked my self if I could handle another disappointment, and believe me I thought I was able to endure it. But as you see, it overcame me. You even told me you were going to visit me. Girl I got excited…
I suppose the only way I can make it through this disappointment is by convincing my self that I am simply, not good enough for her. That maybe she needs more excitement, or more love, or more of who know what. I can’t give her what she wants. But I though all this time, what you have been given was more then enough…? Girl I spoiled you, more then anything in this world. And to make sure it’s clear for everyone. ‘I never even tried buying your love with gifts or anything like that’. My love was purely intentional in one way only: loving you for who you were. But in the end, it doesn’t even matter who did what. We can’t work it out, as much is I would argue that, there’s nothing to argue about. As our dear James Blunt would say: “We shared a moment that would last ‘till the end” “But it’s time to face the truth, I will never be with you”. You know I will be there for you if you need me the most, and I will help you out. However, I suppose, in the mean time we have to go our separate ways. You living your life, and I will live mine. I can’t live on hopping you will come back. Because I have for the past 3 months, and all it brought me was pain.
I feel so small and so hopeless. And every time I say anything, I just feel like its nothing to any of you who read this. It seems to me that you think that I’m just exaggerating stuff instead of “being a man about it” and deal with it. I have never in my entire life so far felt so confused that it seems ridiculous. I feel so over whelmed, I feel like all that I do, doesn’t happen right, it seems like all that I pray, doesn’t come true, it sees like all that I say is forever more be left unresolved. I feel like I complain too much, I feel like I had put all my marbles in one basket. I honestly HAVE TO STOP hoping that she will come back. This is misery for me…cruel, cold and merciless miserly is all there is out of hoping and praying for so many nights. There are no tears sparkly enough to make a difference. There are no cries loud enough to reach your single heart deep inside. No words enough to make you think differently. There’s no eye to eye to spark up those ashes on the bottom of the heart that burned ever so brightly; not a single tear could put it out.
To hell with it! If it makes you feel any better, God, you were something. Something I fought for endlessly, tirelessly, lovingly. You, of all people, should know, the things I care THE MOST for I fight & fight to have it. I take care of it, like there’s no tomorrow. I treasure it to my heart because it so precious to me. No matter how much I tell you, you will never believe, how pretty you were to me, how smart you were, how funny you were, oh I can go on & on. As they say “beauty lie’s in the eye’s of the beholder…” Oh yea, it just hit me. None of this is something you don’t know, it’s all a repeat. I should have told you that before you came to the end of it. Oh well. Can’t have everything your way, though eventually you do…just like this separation.
But leave me on the outside
Where I can feel the rain fill up my shoes
Run away forever, bitter sweet deception
Take my hand and look into my eyes
-I never wanted this
I never asked you for anything
I never wanted this
I suppose the only way I can make it through this disappointment is by convincing my self that I am simply, not good enough for her. That maybe she needs more excitement, or more love, or more of who know what. I can’t give her what she wants. But I though all this time, what you have been given was more then enough…? Girl I spoiled you, more then anything in this world. And to make sure it’s clear for everyone. ‘I never even tried buying your love with gifts or anything like that’. My love was purely intentional in one way only: loving you for who you were. But in the end, it doesn’t even matter who did what. We can’t work it out, as much is I would argue that, there’s nothing to argue about. As our dear James Blunt would say: “We shared a moment that would last ‘till the end” “But it’s time to face the truth, I will never be with you”. You know I will be there for you if you need me the most, and I will help you out. However, I suppose, in the mean time we have to go our separate ways. You living your life, and I will live mine. I can’t live on hopping you will come back. Because I have for the past 3 months, and all it brought me was pain.
I feel so small and so hopeless. And every time I say anything, I just feel like its nothing to any of you who read this. It seems to me that you think that I’m just exaggerating stuff instead of “being a man about it” and deal with it. I have never in my entire life so far felt so confused that it seems ridiculous. I feel so over whelmed, I feel like all that I do, doesn’t happen right, it seems like all that I pray, doesn’t come true, it sees like all that I say is forever more be left unresolved. I feel like I complain too much, I feel like I had put all my marbles in one basket. I honestly HAVE TO STOP hoping that she will come back. This is misery for me…cruel, cold and merciless miserly is all there is out of hoping and praying for so many nights. There are no tears sparkly enough to make a difference. There are no cries loud enough to reach your single heart deep inside. No words enough to make you think differently. There’s no eye to eye to spark up those ashes on the bottom of the heart that burned ever so brightly; not a single tear could put it out.
To hell with it! If it makes you feel any better, God, you were something. Something I fought for endlessly, tirelessly, lovingly. You, of all people, should know, the things I care THE MOST for I fight & fight to have it. I take care of it, like there’s no tomorrow. I treasure it to my heart because it so precious to me. No matter how much I tell you, you will never believe, how pretty you were to me, how smart you were, how funny you were, oh I can go on & on. As they say “beauty lie’s in the eye’s of the beholder…” Oh yea, it just hit me. None of this is something you don’t know, it’s all a repeat. I should have told you that before you came to the end of it. Oh well. Can’t have everything your way, though eventually you do…just like this separation.
But leave me on the outside
Where I can feel the rain fill up my shoes
Run away forever, bitter sweet deception
Take my hand and look into my eyes
-I never wanted this
I never asked you for anything
I never wanted this