(no subject)

[fireworks_]

yesterday was matts viewing
and i had to miss it!!
i had work.
shelley told me all about it
she said she feels better now that she saw him
she said his lips were crusted shut, and so were his eyes.
matt has beautiful eyes. its a shame.
she said she touched him
and she kinda regrets doing it because he was cold and lifeless
but that made her realize the truth
the truth i cant seem to grasp
she said "thats when i knew matt wasnt sleeping. he really is dead"
of course i cried. again.
they are going to cremate him
and throw his ashes off a mountain in hawaii
goodbye matts tattoos.
tuesday is the funeral, i heard they were going to make little necklaces for his friends and everyone who comes with a little bit of his ashes
i want one. i hope they do that.
im still in mourning.
im not ready to say goodbye
i'll wait til tuesday.

dear bliss,
matt isnt sleeping..
and that guy you saw yesterday at school,
that wasnt matt. he just looked like him.
matts dead.
matts dead..