Apr 18, 2007 00:17
Running of fumes...hormones...adrenaline...momentum...what the fuck ever.
I'm never going to let go of the concern for the people I love, and it really seems like they are all taking a beating.
but it seems like things are getting resolved
falling into place
I get so frustrated with people who can not understand the simple fact of love, but like I said earlier tonight, I guess it is all I have ever understood and held on to in this life. When things have been at their worst, I have always known I had love. It is not just the love of a man or woman, but the love of a parent, child, grandmother, sibling, or friend...it was always known.
I do not want Thursday night to be about me, but about the last few weeks coming together. I look forward seeing a wide array of people...saying good-bye to this life in Milledgeville.
It's true I just do not belong here. I do not have a high threshold for this kind of stress. I figure when you know there is somewhere that won't make you crazy...umm GO!
19 was exactly as it should have been....the threshold of something...a zenith of teenage emotions that I hope are leveling out. I want to move into a life of not being petty and childish. Learning how to understand myself even better. Mostly though taking the good with all the fucking bad, and appreciating the little lights in my life.