-Marching Journal Log 3-

[firemage10]

today was alright, got to sit in the front row w. amy r today ^_^ that was cool. the only comment someone made was from Grillo that my chair was "back there" (on the second row) but i think amy kinnda got it across that i was gonna sit there today lol. i realized just how insecure i am today. really rude awakening...but...then again , every night i spend alone w. no one talking to me, i get to thinking and get little eclipses of how i used to be. it happened again last night. but this time it wasnt' about my playing...it was about my ex...Chris. nothing is the same anymore, thats for damn sure. but i can't help feeling that this is 7th grade all over again...(w. my trumpet stuff..) i just gotta prove that i can play.
problem is...im too scared, and after i beat the freshman that beat me, how the hell and i suposed to be a good player...i can't sight read worth a shit! ...how am i suposed to make up for that? i hate having to confidence...it sucks when u want something so baddly..but ur too scared to do it. great huh? heh...

marching stuff--learned to march backwards today, was mild/high hot (i have 3 scales...low,medium, and high, but this is my jounal so i can combine mild and high into "migh" :D )

well im gonna go to bed...(im gettin kinnda funny feelin in the head now....)if u havent' noticed already...i was wiped out today...well..c ya monday!

-My Little World-