[my life is difficult.]
days until GLEE is back from mini hiatus: 25 , days until kurt and blaine have sex: 32
so, yesterday an unbelievable thing happened.
i was out with hide, our weekly beer-talking-bonding-philosophing time. in a cheap, not THAT good, not THAT bad bar. and i got asked for a number. in chelm. by a guy. in a cheap bar. by a guy with quality. engineer. i nearly gaped at him asking "r u srs?!" but it happened. i bet many things he won't call but just the fact that these things can happen in this shitty city is amazing.
and now we go to the fun part of how people-phobic and paranoid i am. i spend my days complaining that i can't find a hook up, that i can't meet new people, that i can't go out alone and flirt and seduce, etc. and when it, kind of, happens, i'm dying. i don't want him to call. i'm nervous just thinking about answering him, going out with him could kill me. i hope he doesn't call. i'm suddenly shy, self-conscious, unsure, shaking hands, etc.
i'm alike a teenage boy going out on a date with his dream girl except i'm not a boy, not a teenager and this guy isn't my dream guy.
i hate this about myself.
so, yesterday an unbelievable thing happened.
i was out with hide, our weekly beer-talking-bonding-philosophing time. in a cheap, not THAT good, not THAT bad bar. and i got asked for a number. in chelm. by a guy. in a cheap bar. by a guy with quality. engineer. i nearly gaped at him asking "r u srs?!" but it happened. i bet many things he won't call but just the fact that these things can happen in this shitty city is amazing.
and now we go to the fun part of how people-phobic and paranoid i am. i spend my days complaining that i can't find a hook up, that i can't meet new people, that i can't go out alone and flirt and seduce, etc. and when it, kind of, happens, i'm dying. i don't want him to call. i'm nervous just thinking about answering him, going out with him could kill me. i hope he doesn't call. i'm suddenly shy, self-conscious, unsure, shaking hands, etc.
i'm alike a teenage boy going out on a date with his dream girl except i'm not a boy, not a teenager and this guy isn't my dream guy.
i hate this about myself.