A Little Help From A Friend- xover Joan of Arcadia, Supernatural, Criminal Minds - Part 06
Title: A Little Help From A Friend
Rating: R/FRA
Summary: Everyone needs a little help from time to time. In this case the Winchester boys find help in their search for God the Winchesters find him in the most unusually normal place, Arcadia Maryland.
Crossover: Supernatural, Joan of Arcadia, Criminal Minds
Disclaimer: Criminal Minds belongs to Jeff Davis and The Mark Gordon Company. Supernatural belongs to Eric Kripke and Wonderland Sound and Vision. Joan of Arcadia belongs to Barbara Hall. This is a work of fiction, done for fun, no money gained.
Word Count: 18,860
Spoilers: Both seasons of Joan of Arcadia. Up to the end of season 4 of Criminal Minds. All of Supernatural just to be safe.
Authors Notes: AU from Common Thread (2x21) with some information from Something Wicked This Way Comes (2x22) of Joan of Arcadia. Ryan Hunter still makes his appearance and still saves Adam but I’m regressing his age a bit so he’s closer in age everyone else making him 24 instead of however old he was in the show. AU from To Hell…And Back (4x25/26) for Criminal Minds, if you know what happens in the end of 26 basically for this story that never happen. AU from Lucifer Rising (4x22) for Supernatural but with Dark Side of the Moon (5x16) being thrown in because it works for this fic. These are in all honestly mostly arbitrary decisions on my part so don’t look to closely into them.
A side note any facts Reid sprouts are probably horribly incorrect as I made them up for the point of this story so don’t take any of them as value.
A special thanks to ficfinishing for prompting me through this because without them I totally would have dropped out. To Rebecca who doesn’t watch any of these shows but still beta’d for me anyway.
~*~*~*~
"Hey Joan," Ryan called jogging to catch up with Joan who'd been power walking her way home trying to get there as fast as possible.
Stopping at someone calling her name Joan turned to greet Ryan, "Hi."
"You're in a hurry today," he commented as he kept pace with her.
"I'm grounded, not allowed anywhere but work, school and home," she explained, "I'm pretty sure my dad is timing how long I take to get home."
"Sounds serious," Ryan remarked.
Joan paused and turned to look at him, You know things right?"
Ryan raised an eyebrow, "I know things, most of it is self taught but yes I know things."
Joan shook her head "No, I mean about the Winchester and God and everything."
"Oh that," Ryan said rolling his eyes, "I know about that."
"Well I accidently told my dad and he called the FBI and they wanted me to tell them what the Winchers where doing here," Joan explained, "And I can't I mean how do I explain they asked me where God is, when the last time I mentioned God I ended up in a summer camp for crazies and now if someone so much as mentions it my dad freaks."
"So you lied?" Ryan said chuckling slightly.
"Yes, what’s so funny," Joan asked confused.
"Nothing, I'm sorry its nothing," he said placing his hand over his mouth until he stopped.
"What should I do," Joan asked, "I have no idea what to do and I haven't seen him since this all started."
"You're asking me?" Ryan said eyes brows raised, "I don't play his game Joan."
"This isn't a game though," Joan hissed at him looking around to see if anyone noticed, "This is the freaking apocalypse, world ending, everyone dying, poofing out of existence apocalypse.
"And?" Ryan said nonchalantly.
"Don't you care?" she hissed at him.
"I'm sure he has a plan," he said with a shrug, "Its not my problem."
"How can you be so callous?" Joan asked shaking her head at him.
"Easy, God gave us free will, this is me using it," Ryan said with another shrug.
Joan opened her mouth to tell him off for his lack of empathy for the rest of the world when she saw Sam, Dean and Castiel heading towards them. Cursing under her breath she looked around to see if she saw anyone who knew her. Running her hands through her hair in frustration not having the time to deal with all of this now, however she waited for the three men to make their way to her. Before they could say anything she cut them off with a hand.
"Come on," Joan said stomping off down the street towards the bus stop.
Behind her she heard Dean and Sam whisper to one another. Glaring in annoyance over her shoulder at them she noticed Castiel giving Ryan strange looks. She looked between Castiel and Ryan wondering but didn't turn around to ask. Once they reached the bus stop Joan plopped down on the bench. Looking over the back of the bench at the four guys loitering behind her she sighed.
"Sam, Dean, Castiel, Ryan," she said pointing to each of them in turn.
"Um, hi," Sam said slightly uncomfortable holding his hand out.
"You don't look anything like he said you'd look like," Ryan said ignoring Sam's hand.
"Who?" Sam asked confused.
"Lucifer," Ryan said simply putting his hands in his sports jacket pocket.
"What?" Dean and Sam said jumping back from him hands going under their jackets.
"Don't," Joan hissed at them looking around thankful that the bus stop was empty, "Do you want someone to notice."
"He talks to Lucifer, the guy trying to destroy the planet," Dean exclaimed.
"He also talks to God," Joan hissed glaring at the three of them, "Why didn't you say you spoke to the devil himself."
Ryan shrug, "Didn't come up."
"Are you helping him?" Joan asked looking at Ryan.
"No," Ryan said shortly.
"Why?" Joan asked.
"Because I think he's going to lose," Ryan said simply.
"Really?" Sam asked surprised.
"Yes," Ryan said.
"Why?" Castiel asked speaking up for the first time.
Ryan looked at Castiel and sneered but did not reply. Joan made a confused face at the look baffled by whatever had passed between the two.
"Ryan?" she asked hesitantly.
Ryan turned his head to look at Joan face not showing anything.
"What the heck Cas?" Dean said looking at Castiel in the same confused way as Joan was looking at Ryan.
"He's not human," Castiel said shortly.
"What?" Sam asked looking over Ryan as if he could see what Castiel was talking about.
"I'm as human as anyone, angel," Ryan sneered the last word.
"What are you?" Castiel asked cocking his head at Ryan as if he could see underneath his skin.
Ryan sneered at Castiel straighten his sports jacket out before turning to Joan.
"I'll see to you later Joan," he said turning to walk away.
"Wait Ryan," Joan called after him but he didn't stop, "Great."
Joan sighed leaning her head against the back of the bench. Rubbing her eyes she took a breath before looking back at the brothers and Castiel.
"Did you guys need something?" she asked.
Sam and Dean shared another speaking look before responding.
"We figured if we hung around you long enough that God would show up and we could talk to him," Sam said finally.
Joan sighed and rolled her eyes, "Well I haven't seen him since before you guys rolled into my life."
Dean and Sam shared another look, confused about Joan's tone.
"Are you angry at us?" Sam hazarded.
Joan sighed again, "I told my dad about you guys and he called the FBI down."
Both Sam and Dean's gave her wide eyed looks.
"Crap why?" Sam asked as Dean cursed quietly in the background.
"My dad got called in because the credit card you used somewhere got flagged, he mentioned it at dinner and I wasn't thinking," she explained, "I mentioned I'd seen you and here we are."
"Why you tell him you talked to us?" Dean asked annoyed.
"He already knew you were in town, it doesn't matter," Joan said frustrated.
"Damnit, damnit, damnit" Dean cursed.
"What does this mean?" Castiel asked confused.
"It means we can't stay here," Sam said cursing.
"But we still haven't spoken to God," Castiel said.
Dean rolled his eyes at Castiel's single mindedness, "And I doubt we'll talk to him if our asses end up in jail Cas."
"I'm sorry," Joan apologized.
Sam shook his head, "No its not your fault, damnit we shouldn't have use that card."
"Joan?" a voice called from behind them.
Joan, Dean and Sam all turned around, Joan mentally noted that Castiel was gone, and saw her mother walking towards them.
"Crap that's my mom, don't do anything stupid," Joan hissed under her breath as she waved to her mom.
"Hi mom," Joan said when her mom was closer.
Helen gave both Sam and Dean surveying look
"We're agents Roberts and Singer," Dean said pulling a badge out of a pocket flashing it at Helen, "We're with the FBI team working with your husband, we just had some follow up questions to ask your daughter."
"Are you suppose to be talking to her without us around?"
"Ma'am there are things that," Sam hesitated, "Thing that teenagers aren't willing to talk about when their parents are around."
"Uh, huh, sure," Helen said still glaring at Sam and Dean.
Joan shot them both a panicked look knowing she needed to get her mom away from the brother before she put the descriptions she'd heard together with the two guys standing in front of her. Joan looked around for something to distract her mom with when the bus pulled up to the corner before the bus stop.
"Mom, we'd better go," Joan said tugging her mom towards the bus, "Dad's probably called the house a bunch of times checking to see if I'm home already."
~*~*~*~
"What’s going on with you and dad?" Luke asked leaning against Joan's doorway.
Joan turned to look at him frowning, "I don't know what you're talking about."
"You haven't been in trouble with dad in a while and now all of a sudden our long lost uncle comes into town and you get grounded."
Joan shrug turning back to her work knowing there was no way she could tell her brother what was going on.
"I mean in the space of a week you got grounded twice for lying," Luke said coming farther into the room, "If I didn't know any better I'd ask if there were demonic forces at work and strange old men following you around."
"What?" Joan asked turning around to face Luke again.
"Buffy reference," Luke said shrugging, "No need to freak unless," he let the rest of his sentence trail off.
"Look nothings going on," Joan said moving to stand by her window on the other side of her room.
"So why are you grounded?" Luke asked, "And being interviewed by FBI agents."
Joan flinched at the mention of being grounded, "How do you know about that? You weren't even home when it happened?" Joan asked.
Luke shrug, "I heard mom and dad talking about it when I went downstairs to get a soda."
Joan nodded her turning back to looking out her window. Luke followed her gaze wondering what held his sisters gaze.
"Anything interesting going on out there?" Luke asked.
Joan didn't respond eyes tracking a figure walking down the street. They stopped briefly in front of Joan's house before waving and continuing on. Joan gasp before scrambling for her jacket rushing past Luke and down the stairs.
"I'm going to see Grace about some homework," Joan yelled as she rushed from the house pulling her coat on.
Vaguely she heard her mother call for her but she was already down the drive and beyond the hedge by the time Helen made it too the door. In the distance Joan could see the Goth form that God had chosen disappearing around the corner. Glancing back towards her house Joan put her coat on fully and hurried down the street. Joan tried to catch up with God but was unable to no matter how fast she walked. Finally giving up and simply following him from a distance. He never went fast enough that Joan lost him so she figured he had a reason for keeping the distance between them. Following him for a while she realized he was leading her to the park where she usually saw little girl god at.
Glancing around the park and not seeing God anywhere Joan signed in frustration. She didn't have time to be hunting for God all over Arcadia.
"Hello Joan," a voice said from behind her causing her to jump and spin around.
"God?" she asked confused.
Standing before Joan wasn't little girl God as Joan mentally called the little girl with bug eyed glasses and overalls nor was it the Goth God she'd been following. Giving the twin girls in front of her confused look unsure if it was God or not.
"Yes?" the girls said tilting their head at Joan.
"Um, hi," Joan said giving the girls a small wave.
"I believe you have some questions for me?" the girls asked in sync walking closer to the fence that separated Joan from them.
"Yeah, I mean I do," Joan said stepping up to the fence.
"Ask them and I'll do my best to answer," the twins said.
"That's a first," Joan said sarcastically.
"Some things have changed," the girls said shrugging.
"The Winchester brothers is what they said true?" Joan asked.
"Yes," the girl said curtly.
Blinking in surprise at Gods curt response, "Aren't you going to stop him, I mean he wants to destroy the whole world."
"No," again Joan's question was met with a curt response.
"Why, don't you care," Joan asked.
"Of course I care that's why I can't do anything," the twins said.
Joan blinked confused at what God meant.
"I can't simply interfere in this Joan, though it may not seem like it too you there are rules to this, things I can and cannot do."
"Who makes there rules?" Joan demanded.
"I did, a very long time ago."
"And you just can't break your rules?"
"Joan if I broke the rules every time someone did something I didn't agree with there would be no such thing as free will," the twin girls chastised.
"But he's going to destroy the world," Joan cried throwing her hands up.
Joan's loud cry caused the few people in the park to turn and look at the three of them. Balking slightly at all the eyes suddenly on them Joan leaned closer to the fence.
"He's going to destroy the world," Joan repeated quieter.
"So are you," God said shaking her head.
Flinching at Gods words Joan gave him a confused look, "I'm going to destroy the world?"
"Not you personally but humanity, every day all day bit by bit you guys are destroying the world," the twins said shrugging in unison.
"Why don't you do something then," Joan hissed trying not to bring attention to them.
"I wish I could but I can't, I can't do anymore than what I'm doing now," God said.
"This isn't fair," Joan cried.
"I know, Joan, I know."
"Why does he want to do this anyway? What have we ever done to him?" Joan asked looking at the twins.
God sighed and the twins slummed down against the fence. Joan rubbed her eyes brushing the tears away. When her vision cleared there were no longer twins standing in front of her on the other side of the fence but an older man that Joan hadn't seen as a form of God before. Joan blinked in confusion at the sudden shift in form.
"When I made the universe," he started to explain, "I made the world, then angels, the people, out of all the things I created I'm most proud of humanity, not that I don't love my children all equally Joan because I do."
Joan nodded as if she understood but she didn't. However she wasn't going to stop God from explaining something once he started.
"I might have," God trailed off, "Bragged a bit to my children and you understand what its like to have a new kid in the house that you're parents are so proud of but you don't understand because all the new baby does is cry, sleep and poop everywhere."
Joan laughing quietly at the analogy remembering a little of what it had been like when her mom and dad brought Luke home. She hadn't understood when they first brought him home what was so special about him because it didn't seem that he did anything but cry, eat and poop.
"Not all of the angels took to the new 'baby' as well as I hoped, Lucifer didn't take it well at all," God explained sighing, "He," God stopped collecting himself, "He thought I'd made a mistake and nothing I could say changed his mind."
Joan nodded, "Ryan told me some of this," mentioning Ryan made her think of Castiel's reaction to Ryan, "What is Ryan?" Joan asked.
"Ryan?" God asked seemingly confused.
"Castiel said he wasn't human but Ryan said he was," Joan said though she was pretty sure God already knew that.
"Ah, Ryan is special, let's leave it at that."
"Like I'm special?" Joan asked.
God shook his head, "No, Joan, not like you."
They fell into a silence leaning against the fence not speaking until Joan broke the silence.
"What am I suppose to do?"
"Trust that I have a plan Joan, that's all you need to do," God said.
Joan looked at God trying to understand what he was telling her. Finally Joan nodded in acceptance.
"Now, I do believe you're not suppose to be out of your house," God said, though his tone was chastising the smile said other wise.
Joan laughed a bit before standing and dusting herself off, "I guess I'll be off them."
"Bye Joan,"