Live doesn't taste the same anymore
I realized something pretty major right now. I can only cry for other people, never for myself. I don't know whether that's pathetic or a strength, but I guess it all depends on who's answering the question.
I don't know what to think right now... about much of anything. The most interesting thing is that nothing really triggered this thought process... animosity I guess would be the emotion. I just feel... like I'm here. To take up space.
In contrast with my last post, I smile at the irony. "Expressions of God" to "expressionless duplicity"... news at 11.
I just feel like life is moving around me and I'm just riding the current, but not enjoying it. I'm just tossed around from wave to wave waiting for my chance to take a breath.
So many ideas of right and wrong conflicting upon themselves everyday. I find it interesting that the most conviction you'll find in the everyday average person, is when they're defending their addictions. Ask someone their faith or what they believe in and (again depending on the person... it's my journal i choose to generalize here) they back peddle the answer. They respond in confidence or consequence not knowing which one themselves either.
I just thought it was interesting that you'll find more excuses and justification out of all if not most drug addicts and then cryptic indecision out of most believers in anything. Not that i'm looking for excuses or justification mind you, I just think it's interesting that we, as people, can believe in something greater than we are so absent minded-ly as opposed to something controlling us without us noticing and then justify the addiction until the day we die.
Humanity... it's a crazy mixed up world... can I get off yet?
Paul
***Addendum:****
After writing this entry I was enticed into taking one of those silly online quiz things that give you a pregenerated message of some sort...
prayer is lovebrought to you by the isLove Generator
Yeah... God needs to lay off me. Can't I have one day when He isn't breathing down my neck?
I don't know what to think right now... about much of anything. The most interesting thing is that nothing really triggered this thought process... animosity I guess would be the emotion. I just feel... like I'm here. To take up space.
In contrast with my last post, I smile at the irony. "Expressions of God" to "expressionless duplicity"... news at 11.
I just feel like life is moving around me and I'm just riding the current, but not enjoying it. I'm just tossed around from wave to wave waiting for my chance to take a breath.
So many ideas of right and wrong conflicting upon themselves everyday. I find it interesting that the most conviction you'll find in the everyday average person, is when they're defending their addictions. Ask someone their faith or what they believe in and (again depending on the person... it's my journal i choose to generalize here) they back peddle the answer. They respond in confidence or consequence not knowing which one themselves either.
I just thought it was interesting that you'll find more excuses and justification out of all if not most drug addicts and then cryptic indecision out of most believers in anything. Not that i'm looking for excuses or justification mind you, I just think it's interesting that we, as people, can believe in something greater than we are so absent minded-ly as opposed to something controlling us without us noticing and then justify the addiction until the day we die.
Humanity... it's a crazy mixed up world... can I get off yet?
Paul
***Addendum:****
After writing this entry I was enticed into taking one of those silly online quiz things that give you a pregenerated message of some sort...
prayer is lovebrought to you by the isLove Generator
Yeah... God needs to lay off me. Can't I have one day when He isn't breathing down my neck?