Oh Holy Mother Of Us All
Ok so I thought this summer has been weird already, well it just got weirder! Let me explain all the crazy happenings so far: 1) On the way to fest we see the girls gone wild tour bus. What are the chances of that? 2) I meet this one guy and some of you know that story.... man that was weird. 3) A friend of mine decides that I'm really hot and decides to start hitting on me and being really close. Usually this wouldnt bother me but the point is is that I had no idea he even liked me. 4)I started working for a friend named Gary and so the other day while working he hired this really hot 26 year old guy. Now then, I'm working in the country so I didnt go and get all prettyfied and such so I'm over here looking like shit. Hot 26 year old decides to hit on me and continually tells me that I have the most beautiful blue eyes that he has ever seen and the sexiest most lushious lips he has ever seen. I'm all happy cuz hot guy is hitting on me and such. 5) Hot guy gets taken away in a cop car for flipping over Gary's truck. Well actually he was in the passenger side but still. I was supposed to go with but at the last minute I decided not to. 6) Today, I get to go over to Gary's house and who is there? His hot son Kirby. Kirby decides to take me for a ride on the 4 wheeler and so naturally I say yes. So I'm holding on for dear life while Kirby is popping wheelies and such all over the country roads and it isn't until we almost flip over that he decides to tell me he is drunk off his ass. We ended up turning all weird and to make sure I didnt fall off, we had to do this whole wide swing thing which ended up making Kirby run over his leg and my legs be spread so far apart I think I'm gonna be walking bow legged for a week. No one was hurt which both of us should have been. 7) Kirby asks me to take him to the store to go and buy cigarettes. Gary tells me that Kirby only wants me to go so that he can get into my pants. Kirby nods his head 'yes'. 8) Gary is like 35ish and is now jealous of Kirby for wanting to take me away from him. They start fighting over me because Gary thinks we are both leaving him. He pulls Kirby out of the truck and hits him then continues to try to beat the living shit out of Kirby. I remind you, they are both drunk. 9) Once they are finished, I go home and tell the Parental Unit about it. He calls Gary and proceeds to jump his shit about he needs to respect me more. Gary gets pissed and comes over and starts trying to fight my dad. My dad actually starts trying to get Gary to hit him. I'm just sitting there like holy shit! Well yea, that has been just some of the random fucked up shit that has happened so far this summer.