Jun 06, 2006 01:17
Whats new again?
the job search hasnt done me any better.. i guess i gotta keep going at it..
I've been contemplating quite a few things with myself lately.
im not who i used to be.. im not who i want to be.. and im not willing to make myself be that person anymore.. i never was.. and why not?
to tell you the truth i dont know..
one thing i can tell you.. i have potential.. great potential.. me and everyone i know, knows it.. so why dont i open it up? why dont i use it?
maybe it isnt really there.. hahah, who am i to fool everyone? theres a fool born every minute.. but truly.. its only in the beholder, you can fool some of the people some of the time.. but you cant fool everyone all of the time.
what is my obsession in life? i dont have one.. nothing entices me enough to get up and go.. yet i need something..
My passion in life has been video games.. yet i cant push myself in any kind of direction to get involved in anything..
i've been fed with a silver spoon all my life.. and on a golden platter things were handed to me.. then as a teen my life took a complete 180.. and now im barely living day to day with enough food to keep my figure? everyones scared ive lost so much weight in the past while.. im still living arent i? i've lost 20 lbs in a few months.. and i havent tried to.. and ive ate just as much as i normally do.. so i dont know why i lost weight?.. what can i do.. hahah
my overuse of '..'s and switching thoughts between sentences.. who can follow my logic? not even me at times.. i jump from subject to subject so rapidly, i rarely put any coherent thoughts together..
if you made it this far.. in any of my posts.. well i dont know why you would.. do i make sense? is it at all any interesting to read.. hahah.. i guess i think its funny..
here i am with a journal writing out whatever comes to mind. which as ive already stated probably makes me seem pretty crazy at times..
so i potentially did some things that could cause quite a bit of drama on thursday.. i hope nothing comes of it.. ill find out tomorrow i suppose if i can make a call..
there was a whole lot more i wanted to write out.. ill spare you the details though.. its nothing better than what i've already written.. who really enjoys this? hahah except you i guess Cheryl.. maybe i will come be your nanny.. hahah... ;D the years we've spent together.. if they could be summed up in something nothing short of crazy.. hahah.. but good fun.. great times.. too bad it wasnt all that real.. we'd probably be beat up somewhere in an alley hahaha.. ok yea ill shut up.. if you made it this far.. im sorry i wasted your time.. please feel free to leave me a comment and tell me so.. =P hah..