A three-star day (of reviews)!
I'm housesitting! Housesitting is one of my absolute favorite things to do: I literally get paid to live at someone else's house, eat their food, watch their movies, use their stuff, and play with their animals. And it's compatible with all the other work I have. It's awesome.
So anyway, it's Monday, December 14th, I have only one final left, the job front actually looks promising for once, I'm going to perform with my a cappella group Vocal Edge later this afternoon, I just bought a huge and amazing poster for Boondock Saints 2: All Saints Day, and today's old reviews are:
National Lampoon's Van Wilder
3 stars
What can be said about this movie that the presence of National Lampoon's name in the title doesn't already make self-evident? Like much of Kevin Smith's work and all of the American Pie series, Van Wilder gets most of its laughs by being as gross and obscene as possible and its thrills from rampant sexual innuendo and nudity. So while I could talk at great length about those elements of this movie, I don't think I need to, because if you've seen one of this genre, you really have pretty much seen them all. Even Van Wilder's "money-shot gag" (yes, the bulldog one) is an echo of the money-shot gag trend started by Cameron Diaz combing ejaculate into her hair and Jason Biggs getting caught mid-coitus with a pie.
What I will talk about is what sets Van Wilder apart from its ilk: altruism. While Van Wilder is full of stereotypes, sexual hoopla, lame jokes and even a somewhat cliche ending, there is a kind spirit to it that would make me pick Van Wilder over most other teen/college party flicks. The title character is cocksure, lazy and unambitious, but he isn't just in it for his own good time. He helps his sick hallmate, he raises money for the swim team. Most importantly, knowing how cool throwing an awesome party makes people look and feel, he helps all kinds of people throw the best parties they can, so they ALL can look and feel cool. In an oddly unselfish way, he wants everyone to be like him, to feel as awesome as he feels. Even his advice, high-handed though it may occasionally sound, is genuinely meant to help its hearers improve their lives. The fact that he is making money from the parties almost becomes secondary--or as least once Van is paid he gives the job his all. It is this factor that keeps Van Wilder from being just one more sophomoric gross-out fest, something its witty script and comically talented leads could not quite manage on their own.
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The Bucket List
3 stars
Picture this: Ebenezer Scrooge and Bob Cratchit both get cancer and, by some chance ending up in the same hospital room, become unlikely friends and decide to spend the last few months of their lives living, as the country song says, "like they were dying"--the latter because he has never had the means, the former because he has never had anyone with whom to share his already-rich lifestyle. Now imagine the crusty, arrogant Jack Nicholson plays Scrooge and the quietly dignified Morgan freeman plays Cratchit. Add thrills, medical jargon, and family drama; season with humor to taste. There, in essence, you have The Bucket List.
Okay, so it's not Dickens; its plot isn't even that Dickensian. In fact, the premise of this movie is far more cliche than it first appears. (Remember the "Live Like You Were Dying" song mentioned above? I was surprised that they didn't play it during the credits.) But The Bucket List's two stars make up in sheer presence what the movie seems to lack in depth and originality.
Right from the start, the disparity between the two characters is highlighted. Nicholson is a rich, crotchety, self-centered white man who drinks only gourmet coffee, eats only epicurean food, and is only visited by his assistant, whom he refuses to call by his correct name. Freeman plays a working-class mechanic who never made it to college but knows enough trivia to dominate Jeopardy, whose wife and grown children can barely tear themselves from his bedside. And at first, the two men do nothing but irritate each other. These factors, small though they may seem, are actually quite important, for without them the Unger/Madison-esque friendship that slowly blooms between the two old men, the friendship that is really the main character of the movie, would never be believable. Freeman and Nicholson, despite the medical morbidity of the film, must have had great fun building and exploring these two characters together, and it shows onscreen, particularly in their adroit comic timing in playing off each other. In another testament to both stars' abilties, Freeman's narrative voiceovers and Nicholson's final eulogy grab viewers by the heartstrings and pull. Hard.
While the sense of growing friendship adds much to the movie, the sense of adventure it seems to want to have does not. With a few notable exceptions--racing antique sports cars being one--the exciting travels the two men take seem more like Nicholson's Edward Cole taking Freeman's Carter Chambers to all the places he's always been able to go rather than a mutual new experience. The audience is left wondering what the two men are really getting out of the experience beyond being able to expand their Where I've Been applications on Facebook. The centrality of medical situations and jargon also proves very distracting. And the poignancy of personal growth and struggle each man faces is sadly tempered by predictability. But despite those setbacks the film ends with a strong sense of hope, dignity and triumph, made worthwhile and inspiring by the two moving performances of its leads.
---
The French Connection
3 stars
The French Connection is not a fun movie. It drags through (mostly) low-speed car chases and on-foot pursuits, it stumbles through clumsy fights, it jerks with abrupt gunshots and scene changes, and it meanders around several characters whose importance never seems to become completely clear. Adjectives like "thrilling," "gripping," and "edge-of-your-seat" do not seem to apply to it anymore; in short, it is not fun to watch. This lack of fun, however, does not stem entirely from the film's being over thirty years old. The movie's age ensured its slow pace, crumbling plot, nonexistent special effects and unglamorous stars, but being a thirtysomething did not exclusively remove this film's fun. The French Connection is not fun, specifically, because it does not portray fun.
To clarify that last statement: Popeye Doyle and his partner do not live the flashy life of a James Bond, with suave tuxedos, self-assured smirks and amazing technological backup. Nor do they live the focused, almost inhumanly capable life of a Jason Bourne, instantly sizing up every situation and knowing exactly what to do. The pace of their work, reflected in the pace of the movie, is usually no faster than a cop can walk in pursuit, and often does not move at all as they stand on a corner or sit in a car for long cold hours on stakeout. Their environment is the dingy back streets, cheap-dive bars, and rough neighborhoods of New York, and to survive there they have made themselves harsh and unyielding. (Aside from his occasional one-night stands, the word "fun" probably has little meaning to Doyle.) Moreover, either in order to interact with so many unsavory characters, or because he already fit in so well with them, Doyle in particular has developed many unsavory and anti-heroic attributes. Aside from his lack of glamour and style, he is disrespectful, insubordinate, profane, temperamental, stubborn, ill-liked by his peers, openly racist and sexist, and turns to violence as the first and best solution to most problems. He is not that good at his job, making several rookie mistakes and blowing his own cover more than once. (It is interesting to note that while many modern action heroes, particularly cops like Lethal Weapon's Martin Riggs and Die Hard's John McClane, share many of these qualities with Doyle, they are all tempered with both capability and "coolness" that Doyle just does not have.) And as if all that weren't enough, Doyle does not even completely succeed; his chief antagonist escapes, he gets no reward or recognition for all his hard work, and the movie ends with a complete lack of the triumph that a modern-day cop-movie ending would practically demand.
So if it isn't fun and its protagonist is a mostly-incompetent jerk, why is this movie so classic? What is it about The French Connection that makes it endure? Two things. First, while Doyle himself is both idiotic and a creep, Gene Hackman's portrayal of him is excellent, showing that under the hard shell of Doyle's attitude lives a man who will never, ever give up. And second, it is clear in hindsight that The French Connection spawned the very cop movies that today seem to be more exciting and fun than it ever was. So in honor of all of those, this film is worth checking out.
---
Until next time,
FBS
So anyway, it's Monday, December 14th, I have only one final left, the job front actually looks promising for once, I'm going to perform with my a cappella group Vocal Edge later this afternoon, I just bought a huge and amazing poster for Boondock Saints 2: All Saints Day, and today's old reviews are:
National Lampoon's Van Wilder
3 stars
What can be said about this movie that the presence of National Lampoon's name in the title doesn't already make self-evident? Like much of Kevin Smith's work and all of the American Pie series, Van Wilder gets most of its laughs by being as gross and obscene as possible and its thrills from rampant sexual innuendo and nudity. So while I could talk at great length about those elements of this movie, I don't think I need to, because if you've seen one of this genre, you really have pretty much seen them all. Even Van Wilder's "money-shot gag" (yes, the bulldog one) is an echo of the money-shot gag trend started by Cameron Diaz combing ejaculate into her hair and Jason Biggs getting caught mid-coitus with a pie.
What I will talk about is what sets Van Wilder apart from its ilk: altruism. While Van Wilder is full of stereotypes, sexual hoopla, lame jokes and even a somewhat cliche ending, there is a kind spirit to it that would make me pick Van Wilder over most other teen/college party flicks. The title character is cocksure, lazy and unambitious, but he isn't just in it for his own good time. He helps his sick hallmate, he raises money for the swim team. Most importantly, knowing how cool throwing an awesome party makes people look and feel, he helps all kinds of people throw the best parties they can, so they ALL can look and feel cool. In an oddly unselfish way, he wants everyone to be like him, to feel as awesome as he feels. Even his advice, high-handed though it may occasionally sound, is genuinely meant to help its hearers improve their lives. The fact that he is making money from the parties almost becomes secondary--or as least once Van is paid he gives the job his all. It is this factor that keeps Van Wilder from being just one more sophomoric gross-out fest, something its witty script and comically talented leads could not quite manage on their own.
---
The Bucket List
3 stars
Picture this: Ebenezer Scrooge and Bob Cratchit both get cancer and, by some chance ending up in the same hospital room, become unlikely friends and decide to spend the last few months of their lives living, as the country song says, "like they were dying"--the latter because he has never had the means, the former because he has never had anyone with whom to share his already-rich lifestyle. Now imagine the crusty, arrogant Jack Nicholson plays Scrooge and the quietly dignified Morgan freeman plays Cratchit. Add thrills, medical jargon, and family drama; season with humor to taste. There, in essence, you have The Bucket List.
Okay, so it's not Dickens; its plot isn't even that Dickensian. In fact, the premise of this movie is far more cliche than it first appears. (Remember the "Live Like You Were Dying" song mentioned above? I was surprised that they didn't play it during the credits.) But The Bucket List's two stars make up in sheer presence what the movie seems to lack in depth and originality.
Right from the start, the disparity between the two characters is highlighted. Nicholson is a rich, crotchety, self-centered white man who drinks only gourmet coffee, eats only epicurean food, and is only visited by his assistant, whom he refuses to call by his correct name. Freeman plays a working-class mechanic who never made it to college but knows enough trivia to dominate Jeopardy, whose wife and grown children can barely tear themselves from his bedside. And at first, the two men do nothing but irritate each other. These factors, small though they may seem, are actually quite important, for without them the Unger/Madison-esque friendship that slowly blooms between the two old men, the friendship that is really the main character of the movie, would never be believable. Freeman and Nicholson, despite the medical morbidity of the film, must have had great fun building and exploring these two characters together, and it shows onscreen, particularly in their adroit comic timing in playing off each other. In another testament to both stars' abilties, Freeman's narrative voiceovers and Nicholson's final eulogy grab viewers by the heartstrings and pull. Hard.
While the sense of growing friendship adds much to the movie, the sense of adventure it seems to want to have does not. With a few notable exceptions--racing antique sports cars being one--the exciting travels the two men take seem more like Nicholson's Edward Cole taking Freeman's Carter Chambers to all the places he's always been able to go rather than a mutual new experience. The audience is left wondering what the two men are really getting out of the experience beyond being able to expand their Where I've Been applications on Facebook. The centrality of medical situations and jargon also proves very distracting. And the poignancy of personal growth and struggle each man faces is sadly tempered by predictability. But despite those setbacks the film ends with a strong sense of hope, dignity and triumph, made worthwhile and inspiring by the two moving performances of its leads.
---
The French Connection
3 stars
The French Connection is not a fun movie. It drags through (mostly) low-speed car chases and on-foot pursuits, it stumbles through clumsy fights, it jerks with abrupt gunshots and scene changes, and it meanders around several characters whose importance never seems to become completely clear. Adjectives like "thrilling," "gripping," and "edge-of-your-seat" do not seem to apply to it anymore; in short, it is not fun to watch. This lack of fun, however, does not stem entirely from the film's being over thirty years old. The movie's age ensured its slow pace, crumbling plot, nonexistent special effects and unglamorous stars, but being a thirtysomething did not exclusively remove this film's fun. The French Connection is not fun, specifically, because it does not portray fun.
To clarify that last statement: Popeye Doyle and his partner do not live the flashy life of a James Bond, with suave tuxedos, self-assured smirks and amazing technological backup. Nor do they live the focused, almost inhumanly capable life of a Jason Bourne, instantly sizing up every situation and knowing exactly what to do. The pace of their work, reflected in the pace of the movie, is usually no faster than a cop can walk in pursuit, and often does not move at all as they stand on a corner or sit in a car for long cold hours on stakeout. Their environment is the dingy back streets, cheap-dive bars, and rough neighborhoods of New York, and to survive there they have made themselves harsh and unyielding. (Aside from his occasional one-night stands, the word "fun" probably has little meaning to Doyle.) Moreover, either in order to interact with so many unsavory characters, or because he already fit in so well with them, Doyle in particular has developed many unsavory and anti-heroic attributes. Aside from his lack of glamour and style, he is disrespectful, insubordinate, profane, temperamental, stubborn, ill-liked by his peers, openly racist and sexist, and turns to violence as the first and best solution to most problems. He is not that good at his job, making several rookie mistakes and blowing his own cover more than once. (It is interesting to note that while many modern action heroes, particularly cops like Lethal Weapon's Martin Riggs and Die Hard's John McClane, share many of these qualities with Doyle, they are all tempered with both capability and "coolness" that Doyle just does not have.) And as if all that weren't enough, Doyle does not even completely succeed; his chief antagonist escapes, he gets no reward or recognition for all his hard work, and the movie ends with a complete lack of the triumph that a modern-day cop-movie ending would practically demand.
So if it isn't fun and its protagonist is a mostly-incompetent jerk, why is this movie so classic? What is it about The French Connection that makes it endure? Two things. First, while Doyle himself is both idiotic and a creep, Gene Hackman's portrayal of him is excellent, showing that under the hard shell of Doyle's attitude lives a man who will never, ever give up. And second, it is clear in hindsight that The French Connection spawned the very cop movies that today seem to be more exciting and fun than it ever was. So in honor of all of those, this film is worth checking out.
---
Until next time,
FBS