Fic: Misinformed (Criminal Minds, Reid / Morgan)
Title: Misinformed
Pair: Spencer Reid / Derek Morgan,
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Not mine, etc.
Feedback: Always Welcome
Criminal Minds Main List
Notes: Written for the CommentFicFest on morganreid_cm
Both J.J. and Prentiss were in the bullpen to welcome Reid back, but he couldn’t focus on them. His eyes were fixed on the items on his desk. Two gift baskets and several plates full of pastries of several sorts. A bouquet of flowers was waiting next to a batch of fresh Danishes.
“Are those from you?”
“No.” J.J. stated. “And I have to say, I’m a little bit jealous. I was gone with the cold for two weeks and nobody left stuff on my desk. You were gone just one week.”
Reid picked observed the gift basket and pulled out a card which had been lodged between a muffin and a fruitcake. He scanned the content and gave the two women a questioning look.
“Has either one of you been talking to Harrison about me?”
“Yeah.” J.J. admitted. “I told him you were sick and Morgan was taking care of you.”
“Think hard. What else did you say?”
“I can’t remember.”
“Read this.” Reid gave the card to her.
“Being happy with yourself is the first step. Try this guy, he treated my neighbour`s girl. Best wishes, Harrison and the guys from tactical operations.” She read out loud. “What guy is he talking about?”
“This.” Reid flipped out a small business card he had hidden into his palm. “Dr. Lee Eagan, speciality: Eating disorders.”
“Whoops….”
“What did you tell him?”
“I might have said that we don’t know when you’d be back because you won’t stop throwing up.”
“Is that exactly how you put it?”
“I think so…. And I did say that Morgan took a day off to try and get some food into you so you wouldn’t loose any more weight….I guess he could have.... possibly.... misunderstood it….”
“You think?” Reid didn’t bother to go easy on sarcasm. “He obviously misunderstood it and judging by the card and the stuff on my desk, he has spread the whole story all over the building.”
“Be fair, if he hasn’t seen the amounts of food you can eat at once without taking time to breathe, it’s understandable to interpret it that way.” Prentiss interrupted. “You look kinda…”
“What?”
“Well, if you’d throw up few more times, fashion people would snatch you and put you on a catwalk.”
“It is questionable to associate anorectic body image with a seemingly positive factors of the entertainment
side of-” Reid gave her an annoyed look. “Did you just say I look anorexic?”
“Well….”
“And compulsive vomiting more characteristic to bulimia than anorexia-”
“We know, but it’s kinda funny.” Prentiss snatched a muffin from the basket and took a big bite. “If you share the treats, we’ll keep spreading rumours.”
“Three things.” Reid paused to draw a deep breath, the way he did before he started one of his ten-vague-intellectual-expressions-per-minute lectures. “First of all: It is repulsive that you make jokes about a serious ailment which can lead to death.”
Both Prentiss and J.J. looked embarrassed.
“Second: Spreading rumours among the workplace is questionable habit all by itself, but when you cause co-workers to worry about my health for no reason it is not questionable anymore. It is a horrible, awful thing to do to people who in good faith believed the rumours.”
“Sorry.” Prentiss swallowed a chewed piece of muffing with a loud gulp. “What’s the third?”
“Third: Stop eating my muffins!”