(no subject)
i haven't used this in so long!
mostly because i didnt know what to post or that it was worth posting.
but today i was talking with jess until late about everything and how this year has started out compared to last year, so theres a lot on my mind. Its so weird how things work out. For me this year started almost exactly like last year did, same people same drama same sketch and same for her.
I hope that its all over now but im not so sure.
(side note: its weird how everyone seems to know each other or how people you just met have a connection to people that you used to be close with in the past. i think thats weird and makes it nearly impossible to completely move on and get over things.)
It's so frustrating when you confide in someone you want to trust, but probably shouldnt and then they blow things way out of proportion and start telling people. There was talk that i "liked" someone and that nobody could flirt with them or even talk to them, and they made it seem like i was possessive and crazy. And thats not true at all, i said they were hot and got excited when they called because well... they are hot and wanted to chill. I mean, who wouldnt get a little excited? And now they just wont stop talking about when we are gonna date/how hes off limits/everythingggggggg. oh and hes seeing someone else AND we're nothing but friends. It seems people just dont know when things arent their business or when to back off. I thought we were all done with highschool drama.. but apparently not.
Secondly; everyone has that one guy that they compare all other guys they date to. I dont understand why i do that.. when the guy i compare them to, is an asshole.. so really anyone is better, but i still do it. I know that i would never date him again, ever but if he ever got a girlfriend, id be a jealous wreck. so hopefully that doesnt happen? i want him to be happy, just not with anyone else. I dont want another girl to take my place, or whats left of it anyway.
In 2 weeks im pretty sure that a lot will change and i have mixed feelings about it. She has been by my side through everything and having her in a completely different country for 4 months is going to be hard. I mean sure we've definitely had our hard times.. but we only came out of it closer than before. She's like a sister and i hope her being away doesnt change that. We have gone 4 months without talking before but it was under different circumstances and it wasnt easy. I'm just going to miss the fact that i dont have someone that i can call at 300 in the morning and talk to about anything and just call her up and come get her to drive with me to markham at midnight just for the company. I'm envious that she gets to leave this place, and happy that shes excited and happy for this because she's been through a rough year. Im excited that she'll get to meet new people, and have this experience. but at the same time.. she cant leave me! My parents said that i could fly out there and visit for a week, so hopefully i can do that.. but i have to talk to her about it first. Just thinking that on my break i cant just walk to the store next to me and talk to her, go get her on my break to go get food with me. It's obvious that nobody can replace her.
Im excited for this year. so hopefully it doesnt let me down.
mostly because i didnt know what to post or that it was worth posting.
but today i was talking with jess until late about everything and how this year has started out compared to last year, so theres a lot on my mind. Its so weird how things work out. For me this year started almost exactly like last year did, same people same drama same sketch and same for her.
I hope that its all over now but im not so sure.
(side note: its weird how everyone seems to know each other or how people you just met have a connection to people that you used to be close with in the past. i think thats weird and makes it nearly impossible to completely move on and get over things.)
It's so frustrating when you confide in someone you want to trust, but probably shouldnt and then they blow things way out of proportion and start telling people. There was talk that i "liked" someone and that nobody could flirt with them or even talk to them, and they made it seem like i was possessive and crazy. And thats not true at all, i said they were hot and got excited when they called because well... they are hot and wanted to chill. I mean, who wouldnt get a little excited? And now they just wont stop talking about when we are gonna date/how hes off limits/everythingggggggg. oh and hes seeing someone else AND we're nothing but friends. It seems people just dont know when things arent their business or when to back off. I thought we were all done with highschool drama.. but apparently not.
Secondly; everyone has that one guy that they compare all other guys they date to. I dont understand why i do that.. when the guy i compare them to, is an asshole.. so really anyone is better, but i still do it. I know that i would never date him again, ever but if he ever got a girlfriend, id be a jealous wreck. so hopefully that doesnt happen? i want him to be happy, just not with anyone else. I dont want another girl to take my place, or whats left of it anyway.
In 2 weeks im pretty sure that a lot will change and i have mixed feelings about it. She has been by my side through everything and having her in a completely different country for 4 months is going to be hard. I mean sure we've definitely had our hard times.. but we only came out of it closer than before. She's like a sister and i hope her being away doesnt change that. We have gone 4 months without talking before but it was under different circumstances and it wasnt easy. I'm just going to miss the fact that i dont have someone that i can call at 300 in the morning and talk to about anything and just call her up and come get her to drive with me to markham at midnight just for the company. I'm envious that she gets to leave this place, and happy that shes excited and happy for this because she's been through a rough year. Im excited that she'll get to meet new people, and have this experience. but at the same time.. she cant leave me! My parents said that i could fly out there and visit for a week, so hopefully i can do that.. but i have to talk to her about it first. Just thinking that on my break i cant just walk to the store next to me and talk to her, go get her on my break to go get food with me. It's obvious that nobody can replace her.
Im excited for this year. so hopefully it doesnt let me down.