(no subject)
goddamnit I want go on a real bonafied (fied your bones, rattle your skeleton) camping trip with a roaring fire and camping-food and tents and sleeping bags and all the necessary materials. really.
well the Good Phase had to end sometime. it's ended abruptly, mostly because the only thing that made it good was my sucessful shirking of responsiblities for as long as possible in order to do whatever I felt like. shirking is temporary. now is the time to grow UP bluckle DOWN, accept that being precocious is no excuse for laziness, and whatever else I might repeatedly tell myself over and over everytime I fuck up and have too much work to do.
you know I'm not realllly sure what it will take to jumpstart my motivation and discard my apathy. but hope it won't hurt. just because I understand and can talk about my inertia doesn't mean I have the ability to overcome it.