Its really blows when a stressful situation gets worse...
Ok, so I am officially out of New York and I moved in with my sister in Gainesville yesterday.
Leaving NY was definently a hell of a lot harder than I thought. Me and Dustin got into it a few times before I left, and that was kinda hard. Yes, we are broken up, and yes, I do agree with him when he tells me that he thinks that I can do better. I know I can, but its still a little bit difficult because of the fact that I feel like I do love him-nevermind the fact that I gave up everything for him. When I left, I didn't think that Dustin was going to be at the airport (Trey took me), but Dustin ended up showing up. He got a pass to walk me to my gate, and he was the last person that I saw as I left. We are broken up, so we both knew that was the end of it, and I cried like a bitch hearing him say "I know this is the last time, but I do love you, baby." Its just incredibly hard sometimes.
I know that I will be happy and that I can be with someone who treats me right and treats me in a way that not only makes me happy, but in a way that I feel like I deserve. I know all of that, but it still doesn't make it easier.
So, I left. I have to start over again, and even though I have my sister and Katrina, I know that its going to be incredibly hard.
Another thing that been somewhat difficult is now I'm having medical problems. I have, what I thought was a rash, that has just been getting bad. I'm not sure if its boils, or a reaction, or what; but all I know is that it sucks. One got infected, and a few are incredibly painful, and Sandy really wants me to go to the hospital up here. The only thing is, I don't have medical insurance, and I can't afford food for myself, much less something like antibiotics. Sandy is really concerned about it getting into my bloodstream, so we're really not sure what to do. It only on my right side kinda by my tattoo. I don't think its a reaction to my tattoo or anything like that, but then again, I'm really not sure.
Bah. This is definently going to be stressful.
Leaving NY was definently a hell of a lot harder than I thought. Me and Dustin got into it a few times before I left, and that was kinda hard. Yes, we are broken up, and yes, I do agree with him when he tells me that he thinks that I can do better. I know I can, but its still a little bit difficult because of the fact that I feel like I do love him-nevermind the fact that I gave up everything for him. When I left, I didn't think that Dustin was going to be at the airport (Trey took me), but Dustin ended up showing up. He got a pass to walk me to my gate, and he was the last person that I saw as I left. We are broken up, so we both knew that was the end of it, and I cried like a bitch hearing him say "I know this is the last time, but I do love you, baby." Its just incredibly hard sometimes.
I know that I will be happy and that I can be with someone who treats me right and treats me in a way that not only makes me happy, but in a way that I feel like I deserve. I know all of that, but it still doesn't make it easier.
So, I left. I have to start over again, and even though I have my sister and Katrina, I know that its going to be incredibly hard.
Another thing that been somewhat difficult is now I'm having medical problems. I have, what I thought was a rash, that has just been getting bad. I'm not sure if its boils, or a reaction, or what; but all I know is that it sucks. One got infected, and a few are incredibly painful, and Sandy really wants me to go to the hospital up here. The only thing is, I don't have medical insurance, and I can't afford food for myself, much less something like antibiotics. Sandy is really concerned about it getting into my bloodstream, so we're really not sure what to do. It only on my right side kinda by my tattoo. I don't think its a reaction to my tattoo or anything like that, but then again, I'm really not sure.
Bah. This is definently going to be stressful.