(no subject)
So, today on my lunch break, a recruiter came up to me and CJ and started throwing his recruiter sales pitch.
"You could have this meal paid for by the military", and things along those lines...Asking us where we worked and what our goals were.
This, is exactly like the conversation that me and Brendon had last night, except he wasn't trying to get me to sign my life away.
This is all a sick reality for me in the fact that I have no idea what I want to do with my life.
A lot of people have a goal about what "they want to be when they grow up" and such...I really have no such goal. Truth of the matter being, I really have NO idea.
People have goals and dreams, and they take measures to achieve that-going to a specific school, or having a specific job.
I do not want to be working at the office, I despise it with every ounce of my body.
Brendon asked me what I wanted in life.
I want to be happy.
It's a broad term, and I understand that, but that is the only thing that I am sure of. I guess my goal right now is to find a goal.
Me and Brendon got into the conversation because, he basically sees relationships as a burden. He sees it as a burden to call the person, or to worry about than, or whatever.
I, however, do not feel like this. I think that relationships could be that extra measure to achieve another goal in life.
Doesn't everyone have that? That seemingly unattainable goal? That fairy tale ending, I guess you could say.
Some say that it doesn't always happen like that. Why the hell not? If you make it a goal to be happy, and to not settle for anything less than what makes you happy, where is the problem in this? Just like any goal, there is always going to be setback. Bumbs in the road, issues, failures.
Why not see them as building blocks instead of something negative that tears you down?
Mistakes are a part of learning and living. I'm possibly one of the most stubborn people in the entire world, and I learn best through experience. I had to be the little kid that got the bejesus shocked out of me several times before I realized I shouldn't put my finger in the light socket.
Ok, I think I'm getting a little bit off track here...Back to the whole goal thing...
I would like to start taking measures toward finding out what makes me happy. I like studying psychology, so I'm taking more classes on the subject. But, I'm not sure if that's what I want to do. Maybe I do want to join the military. I dunno. I know this is the statement that would kill my parents, but what if college isn't for me. Just, what if?
To me, this sucks a lot. My friends now what they want to be and that they have to take step A,B, and C to get to that point.
I, however, don't even know where to begin.
Is any of this making any sense?