I lost myself in my search to find something else to hide behind........
Sometimes I wonder why I didn't just run away and join the circus when I was a kid. Instead I stayed and went to college. What the hell was I thinking? It's not bad you see,this whole college thing, its just not good. Or maybe I'm not letting it be good. I don't know.
I wish for the clarity I know I shall never have. I wish for a peace I hope one day to feel. I wish for the words I lost just a few years ago. But most of all I wish for the time when real life didn't scare me like it does now. I wonder where the actress went. Where that girl who wanted the world went. She was so ready. So open to life. I want her back. Maybe one day I shall find her again. Right now I just feel like I'm treading water, hoping the sea doesn't pull me down. Maybe that's the most we can ask for, merely to stay afloat. I just don't know.
<3 the girl who remembers to update every few months
PS - I miss you every single day.
I wish for the clarity I know I shall never have. I wish for a peace I hope one day to feel. I wish for the words I lost just a few years ago. But most of all I wish for the time when real life didn't scare me like it does now. I wonder where the actress went. Where that girl who wanted the world went. She was so ready. So open to life. I want her back. Maybe one day I shall find her again. Right now I just feel like I'm treading water, hoping the sea doesn't pull me down. Maybe that's the most we can ask for, merely to stay afloat. I just don't know.
<3 the girl who remembers to update every few months
PS - I miss you every single day.