thinking
I was thinking today what my life would've been like if i'd be born and they'd said "its a boy".
Before my brother was born a few weeks agoi never really realised how much significance gender made when you were born and a little baby. i obviously new gender mattered as you grew up but i gathered the baby feels like a baby full stop it doesnt know WHAT or WHO it is, babies mostly dont even look like girls or boys they just look like babies. Dress a baby girl in blue and u get "ahhh what a cute baby boy", dress a baby boy in pink and you get the other way round. Dress babies in the many other colours and things out there and you get the normal question "is it a boy or a girl, followed by how much did he/she weight".
I just find it amusing that the two most commonly asked questions about new babies are also two massive issues that dont really matter at all....your gender and or sexuality (although gender isnt link i'll link it here because in a wider terms anything to do with that doesnt matter and shouldnt be asked) and your looks, weight, height, skin colour. Yet then again this is society, maybe it does matter, maybe it is important after all its the one thing we all have...we ALL have a sex and gender identity and we all have looks. Why not compare them? why not ask?
Anyway...was thinking about how my lifw would've been different. Sure i would've been happy but my life would've panned out so different. I prob wouldnt be were i am now as far as education goes. I wouldnt have the same friends if i hadnt gone to the same college. I wouldnt know my gf and thats for sure. Id probably have a totally different relationship with my parents and i wouldnt have the same relationship with my sister although i believe we'd still be close. Yet i wouldve been happier growing up,so maybe i wouldve met better friends, i know id be more confident like i was when gender didnt matter when i was a little kid.
Would i throw all this in now? no, but only because i know i will soon be living totally how i need to, i am seen for who i am right now and life is good. If i knew i could never live as i need to would i throw all this in if i could start again right? without a doubt.
My futures looking bright. School ends in 3 months, then im totally free i cant wait for univerisity. I'll be on T so very soon, its crazy to think, but im there!
Before my brother was born a few weeks agoi never really realised how much significance gender made when you were born and a little baby. i obviously new gender mattered as you grew up but i gathered the baby feels like a baby full stop it doesnt know WHAT or WHO it is, babies mostly dont even look like girls or boys they just look like babies. Dress a baby girl in blue and u get "ahhh what a cute baby boy", dress a baby boy in pink and you get the other way round. Dress babies in the many other colours and things out there and you get the normal question "is it a boy or a girl, followed by how much did he/she weight".
I just find it amusing that the two most commonly asked questions about new babies are also two massive issues that dont really matter at all....your gender and or sexuality (although gender isnt link i'll link it here because in a wider terms anything to do with that doesnt matter and shouldnt be asked) and your looks, weight, height, skin colour. Yet then again this is society, maybe it does matter, maybe it is important after all its the one thing we all have...we ALL have a sex and gender identity and we all have looks. Why not compare them? why not ask?
Anyway...was thinking about how my lifw would've been different. Sure i would've been happy but my life would've panned out so different. I prob wouldnt be were i am now as far as education goes. I wouldnt have the same friends if i hadnt gone to the same college. I wouldnt know my gf and thats for sure. Id probably have a totally different relationship with my parents and i wouldnt have the same relationship with my sister although i believe we'd still be close. Yet i wouldve been happier growing up,so maybe i wouldve met better friends, i know id be more confident like i was when gender didnt matter when i was a little kid.
Would i throw all this in now? no, but only because i know i will soon be living totally how i need to, i am seen for who i am right now and life is good. If i knew i could never live as i need to would i throw all this in if i could start again right? without a doubt.
My futures looking bright. School ends in 3 months, then im totally free i cant wait for univerisity. I'll be on T so very soon, its crazy to think, but im there!