The heartbreak
Feeling so incredibly overwhelmed tonight. There are so many people around me having babies. Both married and unmarried. I want so badly to carry another child. To hold a baby and to raise it next to Charlie. Just one more and I swear I will be satisfied, even though I originally wanted 4 kids. I hear about so many people who are having babies and they don't even want them or are really capable of raising the child.
On another note though, I really need to take a moment and recognize the Lords hand in making me a better mother. I know I did a lot of things wrong with Charlie before I became more reliant on The Lord. In the last two years or so i have noticed a change in my mothering abilities. I have become more tolerant, more patient, more understanding and loving with children. I am slowly becoming more confident in my abilities as well. Boy I wish I had learned these way before Charlie, but I suppose then I wouldn't have been humbled enough to look to The Lord when I needed him.
I think a trip to the temple in the near future will be greatly needed and appreciated.
Posted via LiveJournal app for iPad.