Pain that should never have happened...

[fille_de_paris]

Hearing about something that I was supposed to be (should have been?) a part of... and it hurts. A lot. More than I will actually ever admit to anyone but myself. I'm not sure how to address the party (parties?) semi-responsible(?) for excluding me (long story)... but I am in pain, especially knowing what I have missed. And several people wondering why I was not there... How do you explain that which you have limited control over?
it hurts. so much. why did you let it happen?