well, i'm officially crazy.
two nights ago i spent the night in the emergency mental health unit at jacobi. they basically locked me up in a room with a crazy woman who was singing/praying/screaming in spanish all night. and i got so mad that they wouldn't let me go outside to talk to my friends who brought me there or smoke a cigarette that i flipped out on the nurses/security and they had to give me a tranquilizer. AWESOME. so i've been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, agoraphobia and possibly bi-polar disorder. i've been saying i've had all of this so long, at least now it's finally confirmed.
i went there for a lot of reasons. mostly because i was at my breaking point and had a serious plan of committing suicide, so i knew by the end of the night i would be dead or have to be institutionalized. they wanted to keep me for a longer period in time but i convinced them i was no longer a danger to myself and they let me go.
today i went to the doctor; told him about everything. he prescribed me 120 .5 mg xanax to take 4 times daily and 50 mg zoloft. i got a referral to a psychiatrist and will hopefully be seeing him/her within the next week.
i am also looking into going on disability because my doctor wrote me a note saying i was unable to go to school/work due to my conditions. i take a trip to the social security office tomorrow. this note he wrote for me will hopefully also work as proof to lehman that i was unable to attend when i withdrew, so i'll be out of debt to them which would be awesome.
my car is officially dead. it stutters every time it starts. i did some research online and pretty much everyone said when they've had the same experience with the car it has just kicked the bucket. my best friend ashley offered to sell me her 2002 ford focus for $2700, but i DESPERATELY need money for it. especially if i can not get on disability, i will have no way to get to work because of my severe phobia to trains/buses. if i got $6.70 from everyone on my myspace friends list, i'd be able to afford it. if i got $8.90 from everyone on my facebook friends list, i'd be able to afford it. my birthday is also coming up so if you wanna be generous or were otherwise planning on getting me anything, just give me whatever you can. even $10 will help. i am in a really critical state mentally and it would help me a GREAT deal. also, if you know ANYONE who would be willing to co-sign a loan for me [i have poor credit and no bank account of my own to open it with] or even lend me the money [which i would pay back with interest], let me know ASAP!
also, i have 23 cents on my phone, which means i can't make ANY phone calls or text, so if you really need to get in touch with me look for me online, respond to this, or call julio's phone.
i hope this is when things start looking up.
i went there for a lot of reasons. mostly because i was at my breaking point and had a serious plan of committing suicide, so i knew by the end of the night i would be dead or have to be institutionalized. they wanted to keep me for a longer period in time but i convinced them i was no longer a danger to myself and they let me go.
today i went to the doctor; told him about everything. he prescribed me 120 .5 mg xanax to take 4 times daily and 50 mg zoloft. i got a referral to a psychiatrist and will hopefully be seeing him/her within the next week.
i am also looking into going on disability because my doctor wrote me a note saying i was unable to go to school/work due to my conditions. i take a trip to the social security office tomorrow. this note he wrote for me will hopefully also work as proof to lehman that i was unable to attend when i withdrew, so i'll be out of debt to them which would be awesome.
my car is officially dead. it stutters every time it starts. i did some research online and pretty much everyone said when they've had the same experience with the car it has just kicked the bucket. my best friend ashley offered to sell me her 2002 ford focus for $2700, but i DESPERATELY need money for it. especially if i can not get on disability, i will have no way to get to work because of my severe phobia to trains/buses. if i got $6.70 from everyone on my myspace friends list, i'd be able to afford it. if i got $8.90 from everyone on my facebook friends list, i'd be able to afford it. my birthday is also coming up so if you wanna be generous or were otherwise planning on getting me anything, just give me whatever you can. even $10 will help. i am in a really critical state mentally and it would help me a GREAT deal. also, if you know ANYONE who would be willing to co-sign a loan for me [i have poor credit and no bank account of my own to open it with] or even lend me the money [which i would pay back with interest], let me know ASAP!
also, i have 23 cents on my phone, which means i can't make ANY phone calls or text, so if you really need to get in touch with me look for me online, respond to this, or call julio's phone.
i hope this is when things start looking up.