just letting it all out
well lets just say that this new year has brought a lot of new things into all of our lives. i at first believed that this year would be exciting and full of new memories with all my girls..that all soon changed when kai got in trouble. i know that she is happy about starting her new life but that means that all of us are still stuck doing that same old things still fucking up and still unhappy with everything that is going on in our lives..it was just the other day when me and carlee sat at a kitchen table alone drinking wishing that our lives were better, wishing that we had that special something in our lives. i guess just hoping that something new would happen and make us all happy again. but instead we are all stuck without a friend near by and the feeling of knowing she wont be with us all the time. with everything that has been happening i just dont know anymore..
guys pretty much suck when i actually start to like one they either just leave or they like someone else.this time is was my friend. i guess they are both happy but it kills knowing that it only took about 3 days for them to start their new fling and i was left there trying to figure out what just went down. it break my heart when it ends with a situation like this. i just wish it all would have worked out in a different way but theres no going back into that past all i can do is sit here hoping that life will get better from the point im at now.
i just want my life to be whole again, to not feel like im now sitting here alone every night wishing that i had something to fill the whole in my heart that my parents took out when they decided they didnt love each other..its all just to much and sitting here wishing isnt helping..
*carlee- thanks for everything i feel like your the only one i have left now a days. i know we have a lot in common with everything going on in our lives and i just hope that we can get through everything together. xoxo please dont leave me
*kaila- dont think that i hate you because of the whole situation..i dont i just wish it would have been different. i know your happy now and that means everything to me. i just wish i could see you and be able to go back to the way it was when we could talk for 2 hours and just cry and everything would seem better. i miss that i miss you and only wish that you were still here.. i would like to come see you when its possible..so please let me know..i would really like it..stay strong..i believe in you..xoxo
guys pretty much suck when i actually start to like one they either just leave or they like someone else.this time is was my friend. i guess they are both happy but it kills knowing that it only took about 3 days for them to start their new fling and i was left there trying to figure out what just went down. it break my heart when it ends with a situation like this. i just wish it all would have worked out in a different way but theres no going back into that past all i can do is sit here hoping that life will get better from the point im at now.
i just want my life to be whole again, to not feel like im now sitting here alone every night wishing that i had something to fill the whole in my heart that my parents took out when they decided they didnt love each other..its all just to much and sitting here wishing isnt helping..
*carlee- thanks for everything i feel like your the only one i have left now a days. i know we have a lot in common with everything going on in our lives and i just hope that we can get through everything together. xoxo please dont leave me
*kaila- dont think that i hate you because of the whole situation..i dont i just wish it would have been different. i know your happy now and that means everything to me. i just wish i could see you and be able to go back to the way it was when we could talk for 2 hours and just cry and everything would seem better. i miss that i miss you and only wish that you were still here.. i would like to come see you when its possible..so please let me know..i would really like it..stay strong..i believe in you..xoxo