The Behr Legacy 2.4
Want to catch up? Behr Legacy Update Collection Post
CAUTION: 60 jpgs + 1 gif = 3.1MB. Two possibly NSFW nude shots, AGAIN. This is beginning to become a frightful trend. *pouts* + Language, adult themes, rampant alcoholism and questionable parenting, etc. ^_^;;
THIS UPDATE IS ALL ABOUT THE BIG EVENT That's right THE big event. And we start off with the 'OH GAWDS FINALLY' engagement. That face? I feel 'Fin is not the ONLY one that is making it. That the option was even available made me involuntarily make that face I believe.... *whistles*
And then... No fanfare at all... O_O;;; Way to be totes nonchalant about it you guys. Its not like you haven't overcome massive interdimensional time-dilated adversity to get here. You could at least feign a little excitement?
Happy Engagement Memory: *shines the ~~BRIGHTEST~~!*
You shine little memory, you shine. *tears up*
Athena Isela: Wait, they're engaged - DOES THIS MEAN I'M MOVING OUT NOW?! :\
Me: No, popular opinion says you're staying put, young lady. ^_^
Athena Isela: Oh. I was kinda hoping you were gonna say yes, so I could get to be young and fancy free forever - or until you drag me into the Cullens...
You know they deliver that to your own home, right, Flannery Myrrh (lauriethemuppet)?? Okay so you're a townie and you don't have a fixed address, but that's no reason to steal papers from those that do. Just call it incentive. You get into a legacy, you get free papers you can let go to waste on the footpath for life! :D
Flannery: *scarpers with the invisible goods*
Log-Hewn Bear: *ponders the fragility that is the mind of a townie*
For a split second there, I thought he was yanking on her pigtails with his right hand... For recreational purposes, you understand. *nods cheefully* Speaking of recreational purposes, that's whats going on here too, cause: REFRESHER?!
THAR BE A BUN IN THAT THAR OVEN!
Judah: Care for another roll in the hay?
Fin: Don't men normally need a little break in between?
Judah: We're sims, we can be here all week! :D
Lemon Pepper: You there, FELINE COMPANION! Compan me! *squish*
Rufus: Tell... Laura... I... Love.. Herrrrr....
Sock Monkey: Be motionless if you're totally glad its the organic and not us.
Lounge-room Bear & Sock Monkey: *be motionless*
Stoic Wicker Giraffe: I wish it were me. *dry wicker tear*
Hehhee he's all asleep and she's watching him with a glint of WANTTOEATCHYA! in her eye... *giggles* I so do this too. xD
*incorrigable*
Yus, Elfin Magic. TIS TRUE! *delight*
Rufus. Just cause I felt like he'd been neglected proper screentime. And surely he deserves it, so mighty!
The morning of the big day... And Judah crawled out of bed, then immeadiately sat back down on the bed, pondering what I can only assume was the future schedule that would begin to unfold in a few hours...
Wow, that was a clunky as hell paragraph. PUSHING ON..!
I GIVE YOU! The Wedding that Judah bought.I GIVE YOU! The Wedding that Judah bought. As much wood and brown and couple-time accoutrements as I could muster. It kinda looked more... woody when I did it. Now its kind of lacking... Huh. Maybe its the angle. OH WELL, ON WITH THE SHOW:
Fin gets up out of bed, and goes straight for a bubbly breakfast. Honey? Don't you think its a little early? Should you not, you know, dress..?
But then Judah, too, decided to go straight for Marie Antoinette's effervescent breast.
Not to be outdone, Athena Isela popped down too in her pyjamas, tailed by little Lemon Pepper, also sporting pyjamas... So I guess none of the guests got the memo that this was a theme wedding, and they turned up i their finest not-sleepwear. OUTBIRK, RESPECT THE WANTS OF THE COUPLE!
*sings* Some of these things are not like the others... Some of these things just do not belong... Can you tell me which things are not like the others by the time I finish this soooong..?
Iida Tampio (johqliini) is still indulging in severe and all-encompassing unrequited love... You're not going to try and steal Fin at the altar are you, honey? I mean that is a FABULOUS gown you're wearing...
Pulling out all the stops would smell of desperation if it weren't on you....
SO YOU'RE LUCKY THAT YOU ARE! V. LUCKY!
----
Oh! I guess I better do a party roll call xD From left to right:
Athena Isela, Judah Catface (SOON TO BE BEHR! *eyebrow waggle*, oh and brilliantcat's), Surinim Choose (choose), Faustie Roksana ( Mine! xD), Elfin Magic, Aramil Nailo ( dragancaor), Norah Inkstained-Stars (inkstaind_stars), and the I-Wanna-Be-Princess-Aurora-When-I-Grow-Up clad, Iida Tampio (johqliini).
----
Elfin Magic Behr! *gasps* Its your OWN wedding and you haven't turned off your phone!? FOR SHAME! Aramil? The hell getting angry and Surinim over apparently nothing. Time and a place, son, time and a place. And... WHAT THE WHAT, ATHENA ISELA?!
Athena Isela: MONEY! *hic* MY MONEY WILL KEEP ME WARM AT NIGHT. And right now..! Cause I'm cold... Oh so cold... *drinks more to warm up and fill the empty void*
A cold, empty void you wouldn't have if you'd just put some clothes on - clothes with pockets to put your money in no less... >_>;;
Note to self: though cool and thematic from the front, putting an enormous piece of zillion year old timber behind the wedding arch means this is all you get to see of the wedding ceremony. Don't do it again.
Five rounds of applause, and one completely ignorant alcoholic. Man, zillion year old timber is so impressive it drives some to drink at the sheer magnitude of age. Apparently.
So anyway, Marriage and...
...Seperate.
Judah Behr (THAT'S RIGHT BABY!): I hope she never finds out about the ILLEGITAMATE CHILD I HAD WITH SOMEONE I DON'T EVEN LIKE. *self medicates*
Elfin Magic Behr: Damn this Lobster Thermidor is hell tasty. Who gives a crap about bottom feeding mercury deposits and their effects on my tiny unborn foetus?! This is MY wedding, dammit *noms*
bondchick_nett: Hey? Is it shellfish you're not supposed to eat when pregnant?
bondchick_nett: Cause of the mercury?
inkidoll: I think so. I dunno, I've never dealt with pregnant people before.
javabean_dreams: me neither
bondchick_nett: I know theres a bunch of fish you're not allowed - which I'm so going to ignore, I mean millions of azns including my entire mother's family can't be wrong, right? xD - but shellfish are largely bottom feeders so you would think they'd put that on the banination list...
inkidoll: wait.... wait what?
javabean_dreams: O_O
javabean_dreams: are you just planning??
bondchick_nett: LMAO NO, I'm writing the Behrs xD
javabean_dreams: dear god woman
inkidoll: OKAY
inkidoll: I WAS WORRIED FOR A SECOND
javabean_dreams: I WAS EXCITED
javabean_dreams: lol! oh dear. XD
bondchick_nett: SORRY FOR GIVING YOU GUYS FALSE BABY HOPES/FEARS!
javabean_dreams: LOL. I ROLLED A WANT, AND INKI ROLLED A FEAR.
Judah: Oh hey guys, we toasting? who we toasting? There's a toast? *chugs tumbler*
Lemon Pepper: May I have a drink? Perhaps some other kind of sustenence? Mayhap some human contact in the form of a hug? *waggles bear ears*
Lemon Pepper: I'm still here, on the path? Hello? I'm tiny and cannot fashion my own tools to hunter gather at this 'puponic' stage of my life cycle?
Surinim Choose: Elfin Magic, Elfin Magic Elfin Magic Elfin Magic. ELFIIIIN MAGIIIIC!! Elfin Magic, ElFIIIIN MaGIIIIC..!
Crowd: *Elfn Magics*
Well it IS the brides day, is it not?
Surinim Choose: *counts more ways in which Elfin Magic is awesome*
This is only the third toast they've done in a row. When these guys decide to make speeches to get drunk, they really go out of their way O_O
So far out of their way that they start bashing their spoons against their flutes in between every sip... O_O I think this was toast five? And they were ALL about Fin.
Every last one of them.
Maybe they were all ACTUALL about how she drives them all to drink?
Toasting finally over (I assume the magnum ran out) Judah and Fin get to the actual business whilst Aramil charges his eye lasers...
Although its possible he's crying inside for his missed chance, black generation style.
I told you once, I told you a thousand times: HAD. YOUR. CHANCE.
You and your lame 2 bolts >_>;;
YES LEMON PEPPER!! AVERT YOUR GAZE, LEST YOU BE INFLUENCED BY YOUR MOTHER, the greatest of all role models... >_>;;
So great that she mainlines vodka from the botle then can't hold her liquor and pees all over her new husband's shoes.
Put THAT in your toast and smoke it, wedding guest lushes!
Fin Magic: HIS SHOES!!! D:
A snapshot into who's into golden showers, and who's really really not... Or perhaps really really is. Norah? We are beggining to guess that the lady doth protest to much!
*gasp*
Rock-pool Jacuzzi's waters: *bes a suspicious yellow*
Well, I guess that IS a possible way of forgetting that that ever happened, Fin... Although its kind of likely to also encourage a repeat offense...
Not that Judah will mind, as he CONTINUES to stand in it O_O;;
Judah: Its good for the leather.
Me: DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD:
Brianna Latrodectus (dragancaor ), look what you done, gal? You done scared the postman. I hope you're proud.
Brianna: Yus |: Very. *morphs newspaper into PS3 before turning it invisible*
Me: OMG I WISH I HAD THE MUTANT ABILITY TO TURN NEWSPAPERS INTO INVISIBLE PS3s..!
Wait, maybe I do. We almost never have a paper around the house, and if they're invisible I'd not be able to SEE any of the PS3s... OMG! I'VE GOT MAGIC POWERS YOU GUYS!!
Don't drink and caregive you guys. It leads to neglect. And dog food. ;_;
THE HECK!? All that rampant alcoholism, a golden shower or two, unrequited heart farting, laser charging and emo love and its only a GOOD TIME?!
WHAT ABOUT THE TODDLER BEING REDUCED TO EATING PAL!??! Surely enough eyebrows would be raised at the parenting neglect to raise a roof along with it?
Judah and Fin: GOOD TIME IS GOOD ENOUGH FOR US! *delight*
Athena Isela: DON'T LEAVE ME ALONE WITH THEM!! *watches guests leave forlornly*
I would say you're not shocked that this happened immeadiately after every one left, but one assumes you ARE, since its UTTERLY out of character for these two to not exhibit. Its ALL about the guests, surely?
Athena Isela: HOLY CRAP, MY NEW BROTHER HAS ACHIEVED NAKEDINATION, AND I DIDN'T EVEN GET ANY CAKE. *punch-drunk shock*
I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt and saying that's a grimace. Okay so a really delighted grimace, but that's still what I'm choosing to believe.
WHAT IS STILL FIREWORKING?! O_O God does Judah Jr have a mind and wiggle will of his own!? O_O;;;
The cake WAS a lie. They never cut it, and it went straight to the bin. ;_;
Athena Isela: A tragica waste of cake... *woe* Even if it were just fiction. Can fiction not move us? Can it not effect our moods, our movements? OUR LIVES?! *has another tumbler in memoriam*
Oh god, now I'm SOOOO HUNGRY O_O;; I'm at the in-laws' and instead of eating we're watching the Crows/Magpies sudden death final instead of eating. I haven't watched a football match since I was 17. BAH!
DNW AFL, DO WANT DELICIOUS BANG-UP PRAWN DINNER.
Elfin Magic: HOLY CRAP, I'M PREGNANT!
Judah's Clenched Butt Cheeks: HOLY CRAP, YOU'RE PREGNANT!
Judah's butt can be forgiven for not knowing, but can Fin?
Elfin Magic: *will totally get aspiration and influence for fulfilling absolutely nothing*
I would say this is ridiculous, but sometimes I know EXACTLY how she feels...
Athena Isela: Give me a little sugar, Rufus bb.
Money and CATS will keep Athena Isela warm at night... We really gotta get you a girlfriend, my pretty one. *pets*
Though apparently, she too wants for nothing.
Lemon Pepper: I DO NOT LOVE YOU COLD UNFEELING ROBOT ARM! O_O
The wedding is well and truly over, lets never speak of it again. And focus once again upon the fact that its business at usually in the Behr household: GYM EQUIPMENT OBSESSION. Its rampant, and its coming to a home near you..!
*gasps* What is this?!
And where did she come from?!
And why are they having a converstion on the floor of the bathroom?
Is it Summer?
How are her hands automagically phasing through her skirt to facilitate her clutching her shins like that?
Does her skirt have faux pockets that allow arms to pass through in cold weather?
Why am I asking so many questions?
DAMMIT! Bolts of two, for Heather Collins (jesstheex). I'd write her off at this point, but I'm not in this for LAIF (I mean lets face it, I so want Athena Isela in the Cullens xD) So in light of that: I SUPPORT THIS MOVE!
Especially since she just appeared in the house no one invited her in or anything, and they went straight for getting to know each other Anna Leonowens style.
You know, with less kissing, singing or Thai people.
Pepper, having survived the trial by starvation that was her parents nuptuals, has made it to her birthday. AMAZING!
And soon it shall be another Behr's day of birth. :D *delighted* I'D LIKE A JUDAH-SKINNED CHILD PLEASE! *puts in request*
DO NOT WANT COMPLETELY RACIST GAME, THANKYOUS! Srsly, you guys will see later on with another couple in another legacy/challenge, I have another S4+S1 match (wait isn't Fin S2?) and all the kids are tan at best. Whats with holding back the melanin, Sims 2 installation?
Anyway! Lemon Pepper has transitioned, And she's distinctive! :D *delighted with her little face. I'd be delighted too, honey, if I knew I could finally bathe and feed myself - albeit well with left overs and pre-squeezed juice, but still! Its an upgrade. :D
Moments later... Well HELLO there New Galaxy. Thought you'd exert your control over our little third generation first born, did we?
Lemon Pepper New Galaxy: MOUTH ON HER BOTTOM LIKE A FECAL-MATTER-EATING-NOT-THROWING FREAK SOCK-MONKEY?! SMASH..!
Lemon Pepper New Galaxy: *shhhhh* Imma keeel you, interloper..! YOU VILE THIEF OF MY AUNT'S SISTER'S AFFECTIONS! *strangling fingers*
ATHENA ISELA!! LOOK BEHIND YOU! O_O;;;
Heather: OMG THANKYOU SO MUCH FOR THAT NARROW ESCAPE! I OWE YOU MA LAIIIIIFS!! O: How can I ever repay you?!
Athena Isela & Heather: *make out elated post-jeopardy girl on girl style*
I meant the dictionary definiton of jeopardy, but even so: I'll take things that are majorly hot for three thousand thanks, Alex!
--