(no subject)
new shoes. i almost ordered these a while ago, but thankfully with my keen eye, and my digging skills, i found these [brand new, mind you] in a pile of slippers at value village. they are teeny on me, but will stretch. plus, thunderbirds for $4! minnetonkas!
i wish for contentment in my life, a lot lately. content is what i always want to be, but since i moved, content hasn't seemed much of a possibility. motherly issues make me so weepy, and i wish she could just be happy with one thing that i do. and it's not so much that i want to try so hard to be perfect, but i wish someday she would realize i'm not the terrible person she treats me like i am. and to make it weirder, it's her birthday, and i celebrated it, and not to get anything in return, and she just ignores that i care. i just have to refuse to let her hurt me.
the weirdest thing of all in my mind is the thought that i hang out with ppl that i never used to get along with more than ppl that have always claimed to be my good friends. maybe ppl really do just change, but why does it have to be this way? and i am not one to usually write ppl off, but it's happened since i moved back, so maybe that's one purpose of why i came here. maybe i needed to know the truth in order to go on with my life. fucked up as it is to say.
but in good news! i am going to be getting full time hours and will be moving out this month! and after that, back to portland!