Venting.
Please, do not read this unless you insist. I am only leaving it here for those who are open-minded enough to think constructively on this matter. This is a warning -- what I have written is offensive to some. This is, however, my journal, and I stand by the idea that I can write what I choose regardless of others' opinions. My stress, my thoughts, my journal.
SO STRESSED...
HOW GET TO SCHOOL?
NO CAR.
NO MONEY FOR CAR
BLACKMAILING PARENTS
SELFISH FATHER
STEALING MY MONEY
MY TAX RETURNS.
NOW WANTS MY LOAN MONEY.
HOW GET TO WORK?
JASON WORKS
WORKS 7 - 5 MOST DAYS
WORKS HARD.
TOO HARD TO NOT BE APPRECIATED.
NO CAR
NO RIDE
NO MONEY
NO SUPPORT
WHAT PRICKS
WHAT PRUDES
BUT ONLY WHEN IT DOESN'T CONCERN THEM.
SUCH SELFISH THOUGHTLESS HYPOCRITICAL PRUDES.
NO SUPPORT
SO I'M NOT MARRIED TO HIM
FUCK THEIR LAME GOD-WORSHIPPING, IGNORANT, DESPERATE, ANCIENT RELIGION.
I'M NOT THEM.
I'M ME.
ME.
MY LIFE.
NOT THEIRS.
DON'T OWE THEM SHIT.
THEY ARE MISTAKEN TO BELIEVE SUCH.
BLACKMAIL ME.
I DON'T CARE ANYMORE.
YOU WANT TO INFLUENCE ME?
FINE.
HERE'S YOUR FUCKING INFLUENCE:
ALTHOUGH YOU MAY THINK IT CHILDISH
IT'S NOT
IT'S DETERMINATION
TO NOT BE TREATED LIKE A CHILD.
WON'T ABIDE BY YOUR AUTHORITY
ONCE I'M GONE, YOU MAKE YOUR DAMN DECISIONS.
I WON'T BOW.
I'LL FIND A WAY
DO IT ON MY OWN.
I MAY HAVE TO KICK MY OWN ASS
GET THROUGH SCHOOL
WITH COLLEGE LOANS SHOVED UP MY ASS
BUT YOU WON'T SEE A BIT OF ME
I WON'T BE HURTING.
WANTED YOUR LOVE
YOUR SUPPORT
IT WOULD HAVE BEEN EASY TO HELP
LIFE WOULD HAVE BEEN EASIER.
GUESS YOUR "RULES"
WHICH DON'T EVEN APPLY TO YOU
MEAN MORE THAN YOUR DAUGHTER
FUCK YOU.
YOU WANT TO PLAY GAMES?
FINE.
HERE'S MY GAME:
YOU BLACKMAIL ME
YOU GET WHAT YOU DISH OUT.
I REFUSE TO BE A PART OF SOMEONE'S LIFE
SOMEONE WHO HAS NO RESPECT OR APPRECIATION FOR MINE.
AND IF THERE WAS ANYTHING WE HAD IN COMMON
IT'S THAT WE'RE BOTH HARD-HEADED.
I JUST HAPPEN TO BE MORE UNDERSTANDING
BUT IN A GAME WHERE ONE SIDE REFUSES TO MOVE
I HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO ROLL THE DICE
MOVE ON WITHOUT.
IT'S BEEN DONE
I'LL DO IT.
GOOD LUCK TRYING TO SQUEEZE ME BETWEEN YOUR THUMB AND INDEX.
SQUASHING ME LIKE A DAMNED BUG WITH YOUR GOD AND TWO-FACED MORALS.
DON'T PREACH
YOU CAN'T PREACH.
YOU CAN'T PREACH WHAT YOU DON'T LIVE.
EVEN IF YOU DID
I'M STILL NOT YOU.
I DON'T BELIEVE WHAT YOU DO.
FUCK YOU.
I'M NOT YOUR DAMN "BABY" ANYMORE.
STOP ACTING LIKE IT.
DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO DO.
SUPPOSE I CAN DO IT JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE.
LOTS OF COLLEGE LOANS.
NO SHAME IN THAT.
I'M A SENSIBLE PERSON, I KNOW I AM.
I JUST WON'T BE HELD DOWN.
NOT WHEN THEY WANT TO KEEP MY LIFE FROM ME.
FUCK THEM.
I'LL FIND A FUCKING WAY.
SO STRESSED...
HOW GET TO SCHOOL?
NO CAR.
NO MONEY FOR CAR
BLACKMAILING PARENTS
SELFISH FATHER
STEALING MY MONEY
MY TAX RETURNS.
NOW WANTS MY LOAN MONEY.
HOW GET TO WORK?
JASON WORKS
WORKS 7 - 5 MOST DAYS
WORKS HARD.
TOO HARD TO NOT BE APPRECIATED.
NO CAR
NO RIDE
NO MONEY
NO SUPPORT
WHAT PRICKS
WHAT PRUDES
BUT ONLY WHEN IT DOESN'T CONCERN THEM.
SUCH SELFISH THOUGHTLESS HYPOCRITICAL PRUDES.
NO SUPPORT
SO I'M NOT MARRIED TO HIM
FUCK THEIR LAME GOD-WORSHIPPING, IGNORANT, DESPERATE, ANCIENT RELIGION.
I'M NOT THEM.
I'M ME.
ME.
MY LIFE.
NOT THEIRS.
DON'T OWE THEM SHIT.
THEY ARE MISTAKEN TO BELIEVE SUCH.
BLACKMAIL ME.
I DON'T CARE ANYMORE.
YOU WANT TO INFLUENCE ME?
FINE.
HERE'S YOUR FUCKING INFLUENCE:
ALTHOUGH YOU MAY THINK IT CHILDISH
IT'S NOT
IT'S DETERMINATION
TO NOT BE TREATED LIKE A CHILD.
WON'T ABIDE BY YOUR AUTHORITY
ONCE I'M GONE, YOU MAKE YOUR DAMN DECISIONS.
I WON'T BOW.
I'LL FIND A WAY
DO IT ON MY OWN.
I MAY HAVE TO KICK MY OWN ASS
GET THROUGH SCHOOL
WITH COLLEGE LOANS SHOVED UP MY ASS
BUT YOU WON'T SEE A BIT OF ME
I WON'T BE HURTING.
WANTED YOUR LOVE
YOUR SUPPORT
IT WOULD HAVE BEEN EASY TO HELP
LIFE WOULD HAVE BEEN EASIER.
GUESS YOUR "RULES"
WHICH DON'T EVEN APPLY TO YOU
MEAN MORE THAN YOUR DAUGHTER
FUCK YOU.
YOU WANT TO PLAY GAMES?
FINE.
HERE'S MY GAME:
YOU BLACKMAIL ME
YOU GET WHAT YOU DISH OUT.
I REFUSE TO BE A PART OF SOMEONE'S LIFE
SOMEONE WHO HAS NO RESPECT OR APPRECIATION FOR MINE.
AND IF THERE WAS ANYTHING WE HAD IN COMMON
IT'S THAT WE'RE BOTH HARD-HEADED.
I JUST HAPPEN TO BE MORE UNDERSTANDING
BUT IN A GAME WHERE ONE SIDE REFUSES TO MOVE
I HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO ROLL THE DICE
MOVE ON WITHOUT.
IT'S BEEN DONE
I'LL DO IT.
GOOD LUCK TRYING TO SQUEEZE ME BETWEEN YOUR THUMB AND INDEX.
SQUASHING ME LIKE A DAMNED BUG WITH YOUR GOD AND TWO-FACED MORALS.
DON'T PREACH
YOU CAN'T PREACH.
YOU CAN'T PREACH WHAT YOU DON'T LIVE.
EVEN IF YOU DID
I'M STILL NOT YOU.
I DON'T BELIEVE WHAT YOU DO.
FUCK YOU.
I'M NOT YOUR DAMN "BABY" ANYMORE.
STOP ACTING LIKE IT.
DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO DO.
SUPPOSE I CAN DO IT JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE.
LOTS OF COLLEGE LOANS.
NO SHAME IN THAT.
I'M A SENSIBLE PERSON, I KNOW I AM.
I JUST WON'T BE HELD DOWN.
NOT WHEN THEY WANT TO KEEP MY LIFE FROM ME.
FUCK THEM.
I'LL FIND A FUCKING WAY.