Daily Prophet, Morning Edition
Date: 30 August, 2000
Time: Morning Edition
Characters Involved: The Daily Prophet
Rating: PG for Skeeter Nonsense
HOGSMEADE CARNIVAL A HUGE SUCCESS
Huge Changes at Hogwarts, The Return of the Weird Sisters, Werewolves and Veelas Manning Kissing Booths amd More!
by Rita Skeeter
The Hogsmeade Carnival was an enormous success, bringing in record crowds this year. Doubtlessly, the opening of Hogwarts school had something to do with the added draw. Several charities were represented, and all report far exceeding their contribution goals. Hogwarts, St. Mungo's, War Orphans, and Rebuilding Resources were just a few of the charities present. Flying Horse Smith had a popular exhibit featuring some of the most magnificent examples of horseflesh known to Wizards. And if you missed out on Madam Rosemerta's rabbit stew - well, you'll have to wait until next year!
One of the first things to greet the eye when entering the town from the main road was a charmingly decorated display which turned out to be one of the most unique Kissing Booths the Wizarding World has ever seen, all proceeds going to Hogwarts School. The occupants within were not only unique, they were both not fully human! Mrs Fleur Weasley, nee Delacour, who had been one of the four TriWizard Champions in 1994, and who is also one-quarter Veela, manned one side of the booth. Assisting her was none other than Order of Merlin, First Class recipient, Remus Lupin, werewolf, newly appointed Gryffindor Head of House and Professor of Defence Against the Dark Arts, and the Seventh most Eligible Bachelor of the Wizarding World. Many of the young ladies in line for their turn at kissing carried items from Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes, with the intent to ask Professor Lupin to sign them, though whether he did or not is unknown.
What is known is that Professor Lupin is not above going to great lengths when the beneficiary is Hogwarts, for he did not scruple to kiss only the lovely ladies visiting him in his booth, but also exchanged a full minute with Mr Myron Wagtail, the second most Eligible Bachelor, which leaves us to wonder if the ladies of the world are not going to be deprived of TWO said bachelors in one blow - to each other. Neither gentleman could be reached for comment.
It is interesting to note that Mr Wagtail left the kissing booth - and eventually Hogsmeade altogether - in the presence of another Order of Merlin recipient, Severus Snape, known Death Eater, convicted Murderer of Albus Dumbledore, pardoned as a spy, newly reinstated Head of Slytherin House and Potions Master at Hogwarts.
Professor Snape appeared so altered as to be almost unrecognisable if not for the Slytherin Head of House badge on his robes. The reason for this astonishing change in his physical appearance is a mystery, though it is common knowledge that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named used his physical attraction to lure his followers in the First War. The way Mr Wagtail and Professor Snape shared a cozy luncheon before disappearing into Hogwarts leaves far more questions than answers.
No one can deny the inherent danger in associating with werewolves and Death Eaters. Mr Wagtail was profoundly affected by deaths during the war, to the point of disbanding his very popular group for a time. His return is delightful to us all, and the concert put on by the Weird Sisters was among the best they've ever done. The sabbatical clearly has done him a great deal of good. However, we would wish Mr Wagtail to be cautious of the company he keeps, and sincerely hope that he is not courting danger as a means by which to inspire himself to write.
The Exhibition Quidditch Game played on Hogwarts' new Pitch was as exciting as it was surprising. Proceeds for this game are specifically earmarked to help fund Hogwarts ambitious new Quidditch Program. Our Saviour, Harry Potter, the most Eligible Bachelor of the Wizarding World, was surprisingly off-form during the game. Draco Malfoy was seeker for the other team, which made the game all the more exciting for anyone who had ever been privileged enough to watch those two play against each other while in Hogwarts. Astonishingly, for the first time, Draco Malfoy caught the Snitch right out from under Harry Potter's very nose, leading his team to victory.
Something clearly was distracting Mr Potter, and we can't help but wonder if it is the mysterious absence of his fiancee, Ginevra Weasley, who has not been seen publicly in some weeks - after having spent a considerable amount of time 'helping the werewolves' at Professor Snape's residence in York.
The Daily Prophet would like to take this opportunity to apologise to Mr Oliver Wood for the recent photograph of his daughter which was accidentally published during the speculation about Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger having a love-child together. While it is still impossible for us to prove said love-child does not exist, the child photographed in the article is Mr Wood's daughter, and Miss Granger is her Minder.
Speaking of Miss Hermione Granger, she was one of the few ladies to whom Mr Wood granted a dance at the Hogwarts Ball. Perhaps he is seeking to find a new mother for his charming little girl.
Neville Longbottom, also one of our top Eligible Bachelors, was seen in the presence of Miss Luna Lovegood. They appeared to be quite intimate together, but by the way Miss Lovegood stormed away, we must assume they had a bit of a lover's spat. Good news, Ladies! Mr Longbottom appears to still be 'available'.
Minerva McGonagall shocked us all by her sweeping changes of the Hogwarts House Sorting system. Beginning this year, students will not be Sorted until their fifth year, instead spending one year in each House, first. Minerva feels this gives the children ample opportunity to get to know one another and to appreciate the positive aspects of each House, thereby combating prejudice, ostensibly.
When this reporter pointed out to her that it also meant that all the students entering the school would spend one year under the dubious influence of a werewolf, and another year under the even more worrisome thrall of a Death Eater, McGonagall was indignant.
"Professor Lupin is no more dangerous than I am right now, young man," she said emphatically. "Professor Snape will be brewing his Wolfsbane potion, and I've never known Severus to botch a potion in his life. Nor is Severus any danger to the school or anyone in it. One could not ask for finer Heads of House to exemplify the very best each of their Houses has to offer."
And so again the pattern continues - Severus Snape providing potions to keep Remus Lupin 'safe', and this does not concern anyone? If ever there was an ideal medium for growing The Next Dark Lord, circumstance has placed Professor Snape right in the middle of it.
Circumstance, or his own actions. No one can deny that Snape does, indeed, exemplify the primary characteristics of Slytherin.
Interesting, too, that this Head of House, always known to be exceedingly reclusive, should have been seen mingling so freely with the guests at the Ball. Miss Hannah Abbott was even seen dancing with him. Miss Abbott's mother was brutally murdered by Death Eaters during the 1996-97 school year - a few months before Snape murdered Dumbledre. What possible purpose could Snape have had for socialising with Miss Abbott, now? Miss Abbott has spent a considerable amount of time away from the Wizarding world, and has only just now begun to show herself in the community once again. Her Tarot booth was one of the many delightful exhibits provided during the four-day event.
Professor Lupin appeared to enjoy the festivities, both at his Kissing booth, and at Hogwarts' Ball. He shared a romantic period on the dance floor with none other than Miss Hermione Granger, a young woman known to be one of the closest friends to The Boy Who Lived. They left the Ball together for a considerable period of time, and it now comes to light that Miss Granger will be Professor Lupin's Teaching Assistant. One must wonder, in addition to all the other sweeping changes, if Headmistress McGonagall is going to alter the standards of decency regarding Teacher/Student relationships as well. We do hope Miss Granger and Professor Lupin will keep their activities out of sight of young, impressionable eyes.
Harry Potter, himself, exemplified all that is Hero, Saviour, and Most Eligible Bachelor in one. He was dressed to the height of fashion - because Harry Potter sets our fashion, now, doesn't he, gents? His choice of dance-partners was unique - many of the young ladies he favoured on the dance floor were former Slytherin students, some of them even on the Registry. One might have been forced to wonder if our Young Hero has an unhealthy attraction to danger - a common psychological disorder which sometimes occurs when one lives in stressful, dangerous times during the most formative period of one's youth, as Mr Potter certainly has done.
Do be careful, Mr Potter - your World Loves You.
Over all, the Carnival was a sweeping success, full of excitement and mystery. It is doubtful whether next year's event will be able to top this one.
Time: Morning Edition
Characters Involved: The Daily Prophet
Rating: PG for Skeeter Nonsense
HOGSMEADE CARNIVAL A HUGE SUCCESS
Huge Changes at Hogwarts, The Return of the Weird Sisters, Werewolves and Veelas Manning Kissing Booths amd More!
by Rita Skeeter
The Hogsmeade Carnival was an enormous success, bringing in record crowds this year. Doubtlessly, the opening of Hogwarts school had something to do with the added draw. Several charities were represented, and all report far exceeding their contribution goals. Hogwarts, St. Mungo's, War Orphans, and Rebuilding Resources were just a few of the charities present. Flying Horse Smith had a popular exhibit featuring some of the most magnificent examples of horseflesh known to Wizards. And if you missed out on Madam Rosemerta's rabbit stew - well, you'll have to wait until next year!
One of the first things to greet the eye when entering the town from the main road was a charmingly decorated display which turned out to be one of the most unique Kissing Booths the Wizarding World has ever seen, all proceeds going to Hogwarts School. The occupants within were not only unique, they were both not fully human! Mrs Fleur Weasley, nee Delacour, who had been one of the four TriWizard Champions in 1994, and who is also one-quarter Veela, manned one side of the booth. Assisting her was none other than Order of Merlin, First Class recipient, Remus Lupin, werewolf, newly appointed Gryffindor Head of House and Professor of Defence Against the Dark Arts, and the Seventh most Eligible Bachelor of the Wizarding World. Many of the young ladies in line for their turn at kissing carried items from Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes, with the intent to ask Professor Lupin to sign them, though whether he did or not is unknown.
What is known is that Professor Lupin is not above going to great lengths when the beneficiary is Hogwarts, for he did not scruple to kiss only the lovely ladies visiting him in his booth, but also exchanged a full minute with Mr Myron Wagtail, the second most Eligible Bachelor, which leaves us to wonder if the ladies of the world are not going to be deprived of TWO said bachelors in one blow - to each other. Neither gentleman could be reached for comment.
It is interesting to note that Mr Wagtail left the kissing booth - and eventually Hogsmeade altogether - in the presence of another Order of Merlin recipient, Severus Snape, known Death Eater, convicted Murderer of Albus Dumbledore, pardoned as a spy, newly reinstated Head of Slytherin House and Potions Master at Hogwarts.
Professor Snape appeared so altered as to be almost unrecognisable if not for the Slytherin Head of House badge on his robes. The reason for this astonishing change in his physical appearance is a mystery, though it is common knowledge that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named used his physical attraction to lure his followers in the First War. The way Mr Wagtail and Professor Snape shared a cozy luncheon before disappearing into Hogwarts leaves far more questions than answers.
No one can deny the inherent danger in associating with werewolves and Death Eaters. Mr Wagtail was profoundly affected by deaths during the war, to the point of disbanding his very popular group for a time. His return is delightful to us all, and the concert put on by the Weird Sisters was among the best they've ever done. The sabbatical clearly has done him a great deal of good. However, we would wish Mr Wagtail to be cautious of the company he keeps, and sincerely hope that he is not courting danger as a means by which to inspire himself to write.
The Exhibition Quidditch Game played on Hogwarts' new Pitch was as exciting as it was surprising. Proceeds for this game are specifically earmarked to help fund Hogwarts ambitious new Quidditch Program. Our Saviour, Harry Potter, the most Eligible Bachelor of the Wizarding World, was surprisingly off-form during the game. Draco Malfoy was seeker for the other team, which made the game all the more exciting for anyone who had ever been privileged enough to watch those two play against each other while in Hogwarts. Astonishingly, for the first time, Draco Malfoy caught the Snitch right out from under Harry Potter's very nose, leading his team to victory.
Something clearly was distracting Mr Potter, and we can't help but wonder if it is the mysterious absence of his fiancee, Ginevra Weasley, who has not been seen publicly in some weeks - after having spent a considerable amount of time 'helping the werewolves' at Professor Snape's residence in York.
The Daily Prophet would like to take this opportunity to apologise to Mr Oliver Wood for the recent photograph of his daughter which was accidentally published during the speculation about Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger having a love-child together. While it is still impossible for us to prove said love-child does not exist, the child photographed in the article is Mr Wood's daughter, and Miss Granger is her Minder.
Speaking of Miss Hermione Granger, she was one of the few ladies to whom Mr Wood granted a dance at the Hogwarts Ball. Perhaps he is seeking to find a new mother for his charming little girl.
Neville Longbottom, also one of our top Eligible Bachelors, was seen in the presence of Miss Luna Lovegood. They appeared to be quite intimate together, but by the way Miss Lovegood stormed away, we must assume they had a bit of a lover's spat. Good news, Ladies! Mr Longbottom appears to still be 'available'.
Minerva McGonagall shocked us all by her sweeping changes of the Hogwarts House Sorting system. Beginning this year, students will not be Sorted until their fifth year, instead spending one year in each House, first. Minerva feels this gives the children ample opportunity to get to know one another and to appreciate the positive aspects of each House, thereby combating prejudice, ostensibly.
When this reporter pointed out to her that it also meant that all the students entering the school would spend one year under the dubious influence of a werewolf, and another year under the even more worrisome thrall of a Death Eater, McGonagall was indignant.
"Professor Lupin is no more dangerous than I am right now, young man," she said emphatically. "Professor Snape will be brewing his Wolfsbane potion, and I've never known Severus to botch a potion in his life. Nor is Severus any danger to the school or anyone in it. One could not ask for finer Heads of House to exemplify the very best each of their Houses has to offer."
And so again the pattern continues - Severus Snape providing potions to keep Remus Lupin 'safe', and this does not concern anyone? If ever there was an ideal medium for growing The Next Dark Lord, circumstance has placed Professor Snape right in the middle of it.
Circumstance, or his own actions. No one can deny that Snape does, indeed, exemplify the primary characteristics of Slytherin.
Interesting, too, that this Head of House, always known to be exceedingly reclusive, should have been seen mingling so freely with the guests at the Ball. Miss Hannah Abbott was even seen dancing with him. Miss Abbott's mother was brutally murdered by Death Eaters during the 1996-97 school year - a few months before Snape murdered Dumbledre. What possible purpose could Snape have had for socialising with Miss Abbott, now? Miss Abbott has spent a considerable amount of time away from the Wizarding world, and has only just now begun to show herself in the community once again. Her Tarot booth was one of the many delightful exhibits provided during the four-day event.
Professor Lupin appeared to enjoy the festivities, both at his Kissing booth, and at Hogwarts' Ball. He shared a romantic period on the dance floor with none other than Miss Hermione Granger, a young woman known to be one of the closest friends to The Boy Who Lived. They left the Ball together for a considerable period of time, and it now comes to light that Miss Granger will be Professor Lupin's Teaching Assistant. One must wonder, in addition to all the other sweeping changes, if Headmistress McGonagall is going to alter the standards of decency regarding Teacher/Student relationships as well. We do hope Miss Granger and Professor Lupin will keep their activities out of sight of young, impressionable eyes.
Harry Potter, himself, exemplified all that is Hero, Saviour, and Most Eligible Bachelor in one. He was dressed to the height of fashion - because Harry Potter sets our fashion, now, doesn't he, gents? His choice of dance-partners was unique - many of the young ladies he favoured on the dance floor were former Slytherin students, some of them even on the Registry. One might have been forced to wonder if our Young Hero has an unhealthy attraction to danger - a common psychological disorder which sometimes occurs when one lives in stressful, dangerous times during the most formative period of one's youth, as Mr Potter certainly has done.
Do be careful, Mr Potter - your World Loves You.
Over all, the Carnival was a sweeping success, full of excitement and mystery. It is doubtful whether next year's event will be able to top this one.