I have absolutely no self-control.
Ugh. I fasted for like two days, then binged and binged and binged every day for the past week and I can't break the cycle. "Tomorrow will be different." Fuck that. I hadn't eaten anything at all today too, thought I was gunna turn things around, until my aunt came over with three boxes of chocolates for V-Day. My first instinct, of course, devour the entire box. I've gained so much weight. I don't feel pretty in any of my clothes. I'm starting to get horrible acne too which I think is the cause of my stress, anxiety, and diet. My room looks like a disgusting mess with plates and bowls of food everywhere. Everytime I go to work I raid the aisles of candy and chips open bags eat them and then put them in the damaged container. Disgusting. I've never felt so ugly on a daily basis. I don't even have "pretty days" anymore. Even if I put on makeup I look like an ugly person trying to be pretty. I don't even want to visit my boyfriend because I feel so disgusting. I don't even know what to tell him. I'm just a fat fucking failure. Sigh.