(no subject)
It's been ten days since I touched this thing. I know I had several new people friend me and should be doing an introduction post, but I've been in a mood too foul to do anything productive. I haven't been updating FRAGMENTS for over a week, and while the promised fic is moving, it's moving very slowly. Sometimes, I go online and just wonder if I should bother hitting the 'enter' button at all.
I find myself intellectually starved. These days, my biggest pleasure in life is story-driven RP. However, it's been the longest time since I got to do any of that. I find myself so starved where RP is considered, the gears of my mind refuse to turn at all.
Don't get me wrong, Island is a fascinating game. I love the people, the action and everything else. I even somehow managed to score a popular character. However, it's still a crack RP and I'm in it for the people and for the fun. It cheers me up a great deal, but it doesn't really have what I'm looking for.
Jardin du Ciel, on other hand, fails me because it is nearly dead. Every day, I find myself considering a post that would close the game, and only Lieke's interventions keep me from doing so. Finding players proved to be an awkward and often hellish experience. The few we have are great, but I keep worrying that even they will lose interest due to lacking activity and wander off.
It pains me, because it is my game and I put tons of effort into it. However, launching games and finding players is extremely difficult if you're not popular in fandom, and I'm anything but that.
I considered applying to other games, but I still don't know about that. I mostly play popular characters who are already taken on every game out there, and the more obscure choices of mine usually fail to generate interest. Rather than try and fail, I would rather not try at all. I know it's a morbid outlook, but lately, I find it more comfortable to be a fatalist than to be myself.
I find it tiring that a hobby of mine is giving me so much stress. I should've picked one with less chance of error.
I find myself intellectually starved. These days, my biggest pleasure in life is story-driven RP. However, it's been the longest time since I got to do any of that. I find myself so starved where RP is considered, the gears of my mind refuse to turn at all.
Don't get me wrong, Island is a fascinating game. I love the people, the action and everything else. I even somehow managed to score a popular character. However, it's still a crack RP and I'm in it for the people and for the fun. It cheers me up a great deal, but it doesn't really have what I'm looking for.
Jardin du Ciel, on other hand, fails me because it is nearly dead. Every day, I find myself considering a post that would close the game, and only Lieke's interventions keep me from doing so. Finding players proved to be an awkward and often hellish experience. The few we have are great, but I keep worrying that even they will lose interest due to lacking activity and wander off.
It pains me, because it is my game and I put tons of effort into it. However, launching games and finding players is extremely difficult if you're not popular in fandom, and I'm anything but that.
I considered applying to other games, but I still don't know about that. I mostly play popular characters who are already taken on every game out there, and the more obscure choices of mine usually fail to generate interest. Rather than try and fail, I would rather not try at all. I know it's a morbid outlook, but lately, I find it more comfortable to be a fatalist than to be myself.
I find it tiring that a hobby of mine is giving me so much stress. I should've picked one with less chance of error.