The Collaboration - Chapter 24
Title: The Collaboration
Author: fictionfreak15
Beta: gwencarmichael Love You!!!! <3
Pairing: Adam & OMC, Adommy
Disclaimer: This did not happen. Don't own the celebs mentioned in the story.
Warnings: This fic contains swearing, insensitive comments, some homophobia later, light violence and a dash of sex
Summary: Adam is asked to lend his vocals skills after an emotional performance at the Oscars catches the artistic interest of a "High Rock" singer named Calad, right before Adam starts working on his new music video. When the pressures of the music industry and intolerance threaten to test their abilities as artists, the friendship they have formed must hold them together.
Special Author's Note: I’ve made up a rock band in this story called Tamera’s First Born. The members of the band are completely fictional; however, any song titles, lyrics and album names are taken from the real life band Coheed an Cambria. I will post links in various chapters that will include specific Coheed and Cambria songs mentioned.
***
Chapter Note: Calad shows up unexpectedly in LA...
A/N: Wanna thank everyone again for sticking with this. Pretty close to the end, but there are a few little bonus things that you will hopefully enjoy afterwards :) Love and Respect - fictionfreak15
Chapter 24
Grady took Calad home, and both Chris and Mike were in the living room. When they came in, the musicians automatically focused on Grady as if to say, 'Well?' Calad was immediately pissed, but he didn't say anything. He just went into his room, stewing about how Mike and Chris would listen to Grady but not to Adam or him. Oh well, as long as they saw things the right way finally. What did it matter who they heard about the video from?
He sat in his bedroom and picked up an old acoustic guitar that he always kept there. He played random notes, making it up as he went along. It reflected the way he felt - pissed and lonely - but he lamented that the sound was incorrect. Nothing sounded better than his own double neck guitar, and this acoustic was just not good enough. He felt like smashing it. He really did, but he knew that wouldn't make it better. His fingers went dead, and he sighed. He was missing his old Gibson and just wanted to feel the strings against his fingers.
The busted instrument was still kept in the studio in the back of the house. Calad had hidden it under the broken couch that was in there because he hadn't had time to deal with it. Now he felt ready to take another look at it and see if there would be any hope for it. A small smile made an appearance on his face at the thought of getting to tell Adam that he'd gotten it fixed. Feeling a little more optimistic, Calad put aside the acoustic as well as his frustrations about his band and left his room, heading for the studio.
***
Idol week was great. Adam had a lot of fun mentoring, doing interviews, and performing on stage in front of the Idol audience again. He felt so good about his life and his career that he arranged to give the fans something extra. He brought lasers, a new arrangement for the song, and he brought down the house. Everyone was feeling like this is the life. They headed back home when it was over, and Adam was excited because everything was pretty much set for his 'Broken Open' video. He couldn't wait to shoot it and show everybody.
Tommy and Adam got a separate ride from the rest, sitting in the back seat together. They were talking about the show from the night before, laughing about certain parts and just enjoying each other's company. They'd done some interviews earlier in the day, but they would have some free time the rest of the evening and looked forward to spending it together at home.
Adam took Tommy's hand in his, laid his head back, and sighed. Tommy looked up at him. "Poor baby..." he said, bringing Adam's hand up to kiss it. "You must be so tired."
"I just want to relax with you, babe. Let's turn off our phones and not even get on the computer tonight. I just wanna leave the world outside." Adam looked at him and smiled.
Tommy leaned in and kissed him on the lips just once. "You've got it, baby."
The car pulled up in front of Adam's place, and it was still about an hour and a half before dusk. Plenty of time to have some dinner and maybe pick out a movie to watch. Then later, Adam planned on making love to his boyfriend again. By this time, Tommy was now his and not the boy that he didn't think he could have a month ago. And Tommy's love for him seemed even more sure than before. They were both so happy.
They exited the car. Adam walked around to meet Tommy at the curb and noticed him staring at their home. "Who's that?" Tommy asked, keeping his eyes forward.
Adam looked and saw a figure slumped down on the steps that led up to the front door. Immediately, he recognized a baggy, blue denim jacket and a bit of black hair sticking out from under a hat. "It's Calad," he said, amazed. He approached the house, and Tommy followed.
The closer Adam got, the better he could see Calad Areese sitting on the top step, leaning to the side on the railing, out cold.
"Is he okay?" Tommy asked.
"Yeah, he's...asleep," Adam said lightly. "Baby, why don't you go on in. I'll wake him up." Adam waved so that the driver could go on, and Tommy nodded, walking up the stairs and opening the door with his key. As he did, Adam gently roused Calad, who wasn't due in LA for two more days.
"Dude, you surprised me," Adam said lightly when Calad awoke. "I didn't know you were coming today. This is great!" He stood Calad up.
"I'm sorry, Adam. I didn't know where else to go." Calad wouldn't look at him.
"What happened?" Adam was immediately concerned, searching the boy's sleepy face for any sign of new injury. There was none, but Calad did not look happy.
Calad seemed to have trouble answering, and he just wouldn't look up. Adam put his arm around the boy's shoulder, which had a back pack hanging from it, and led him inside his home.
They met Tommy inside, and all went into the living room. The bassist asked again if Calad was okay, guessing that there really hadn't been enough time for Adam to find out.
Adam said, "I don't know..." He turned to Calad and said, "Let's sit down and talk, okay?" Calad finally nodded.
"Should I go...leave you guys alone?" Tommy asked.
Again, Adam wasn't sure. He looked at Calad for advice. "Do you want to have some privacy?"
Calad didn't have a problem with Tommy at all, plus it felt weird to try and ask someone to leave a room in his own house. Calad shook his head. "I don't care if he's here."
Tommy sat on a chair, pulling up his legs to hug his knees, and Adam was next to Calad on the couch, a friendly hand on his shoulder.
"What's going on, Calad?"
"I had to get out for a while. I just really needed to get out of that house. This was the only place I wanted to be," he added softly.
Adam frowned in sympathy, rubbing the boy's shoulder. "Well, I'm glad you're here," he said, trying to make Calad feel welcome. "Are you hungry?"
"Can I have some water?" Calad asked.
"Sure."
"I'll get it," Tommy offered, and he hopped off the chair toward the kitchen. Soon he was back and handed the High Rocker a cold bottle of water.
As Calad drank half the bottle without stopping, Adam asked, "How long were you out there?"
Calad took a minute to catch his breath before answering. "I don't know. An hour or two?" Adam was feeling the boy's forehead with the backs of his fingers to check for a temperature. It had been a warm afternoon, so he had to make sure.
"You wanna lie down for a while?" Tommy asked, remembering Adam always saying how tired Calad usually looked but didn't know it was this bad after seeing him up close.
"No, I was just sitting there and fell asleep. I’m fine, thanks."
Adam asked, "What's got you so down, man?"
Calad sighed, taking another drink of water. "I want to apologize first for coming over without asking. I kinda just left home and flew out here. I tried to call a couple times, but I couldn't get through."
"It's okay, Calad. Don't worry about it." Adam asked lightly. "Why'd you have to leave home?"
Calad kept his head down. "I've been suffocating for the last few days. Things aren't smooth with my band, not as much as I hoped they would be. And a lotta stuff I've been trying to forget keeps coming up in my head. I can't tell any of the guys about it. They're not used to listening to me, and I don't know why they'd even care."
"You can talk to us," Adam offered.
Calad glanced up at him quickly but looked away again before saying, "I don't know where to start."
"Is it the band?"
Calad said, "It's the band, it's the album, it's my guitar, it's everything. For one, I don't know, I guess the guys would still like it if I wasn't in that video, but what really pissed me off is that they wouldn't talk to me. If you were a female singer they wouldn't have a problem. I just hate how...how they can't just see you. Why can't they like you the way I do?" Calad huffed with a scowl.
Adam rubbed Calad's back a bit more, knowing his confusion and frustration, but remembered feeling it when he was like...13 years old or something. Calad's mind seemed just like a kid's sometimes, and Adam was realizing that since they'd become friends. To try to help him, Adam just said, "Because things don't go our way all the time, buddy. It's like what I said before. There's always gonna be people who won't give me the time of day no matter how much you want them to like me. The trick is to learn not to take it personally."
Calad nodded a little, feeling relieved that he could finally talk about this. Then Adam said, "And what about the album? Isn't it done? I mean, what happened with that?"
Calad took another sip of his water. "Yeah, that's just the problem. It's over. I'm 23 years old, and I think I've peaked. I've completed the greatest thing I can imagine, and I just don't think I can do any better than what I've done. I mean, artistically and conceptually...and musically, I can't even equal what I've created ever again. If I even attempt another album...High Rock fans are going to know I'm spent. I don't know what I'm going to do. Nothing felt so good as writing this music, and now I feel I've lived through the passing of an era...the end of High Rock as I know it."
Adam made Calad turn toward him. "Listen to me, man. You shouldn't count yourself out just yet, you know? I mean...you are exhausted. You've been going at it for years now almost non-stop, and you just need a break. You're right...what you've written is incredible. And probably no one else will ever match it ever again, but you are so gifted and so talented, Calad, that you could never produce anything but pure art. Sure, your first story is over. Now it's time to begin a new one."
Calad looked at Adam. "I don't have any others."
"Well, not yet, but you've got to give yourself more than a month before you start making that assessment, dude. You've been doing nothing but writing and performing music. Take some time off. Live a little, find something besides music that you enjoy doing, and do it. That's how all the good stories and songs get created. Can't expect to come up with something new and worthwhile if you never go anywhere or do anything."
Calad nodded; it made sense to him.
Tommy sat silently and listened, wondering with pity why this kid never figured any of this out himself.
"What else?" Adam asked.
Calad put the bottle to his lips while hunched over, looking out into nothing, then he took it away and said, "I can't play the guitar any more."
"What do you mean? What happened?" asked Adam, very surprised to hear him say that.
Calad shook his head and frowned heavily, and his voice was nearly inaudible as he said, "I've just...lost the point."
Adam looked at Tommy with concern, then went back to Calad. "Well, then maybe you need to take a break from that, too. Anybody can get burnt out on something. Just..."
"That's not what I mean..." Calad said, interrupting Adam for maybe the second time ever.
"What then?"
Calad said, "It doesn't feel the same..."
"You mean without your old one?"
Calad nodded. "I thought I could handle the fact that it got broken. There would be time to...but now that it's gone..."
"'Gone'? What do you mean?"
Calad's eyes burned. "He just didn't know..." He tried to mask his cracking voice with a cough and seemed to be trying to convince himself more than anything else. The other two waited, but Calad only asked for the bathroom, getting off the couch.
"It's that way, Calad. To your right. First door on your left," Adam directed. The boy walked off quickly.
"What's he talkin' about?" asked Tommy.
"It's this guitar he had before I met him. Grady said it meant a lot to him, and it got busted when Mike attacked him a little while ago. That's all I know really."
"He couldn’t get it fixed?"
Adam shrugged, not knowing.
***
Adam heard the toilet flush a few minutes after Calad left. He waited some more, but Calad wasn't coming out, so he left Tommy in the living room and knocked on the door. He called to Calad.
The door slowly opened, and Adam found the boy standing with his back to the mirror. Calad's face, seen in profile by Adam, was red like he'd been crying and struggling to keep his face dry. Adam entered and stood in front of Calad, towering again over his shorter stature. Not saying anything at first, and not having any eye contact from the shaky musician, Adam grabbed a wash cloth from a cabinet and ran it under cool water. Then he handed it to Calad so he could wipe his face. By this time, Tommy had appeared in the doorway to check on things. Calad had just finished wiping his face with Adam looking on and frowning, and Tommy stepped in. "Come on," he said quietly. "Let's go sit down again."
Back in the living room, all three of them sitting on the couch now, it took Adam a lot longer to coax Calad into continuing. Calad's voice was hardly a whisper, as if what he had to say weighed down his very soul. "It's gone..." he said. "It's gone and I'll n-never get it back."
Adam took Calad's hand. "You're guitar? What happened to it?"
Calad's lower lip quivered so badly it looked like a spasm. Adam didn't know if he was going to be able to keep going. But somehow, the boy said, "Mike threw it out..."
Adam gasped. "Why would he do that?"
Calad kept his eyes lowered the whole time and at Adam's reaction, he began speaking a bit louder than before, quicker, and in that same convincing tone as before. "H-he didn't know I wanted to try to repair it. He told me he was cleaning out the studio. I had the guitar...the pieces, hidden...I didn't think anyone would touch it. I went in and couldn't find it." Calad inhaled deep and shaky as if he couldn't get enough air. "Mike said it was useless now...that he thought it was just gonna be thrown out eventually, so he threw it...he took it to where they pick up the garbage with the rest of the trash! By the time I found out about it..." Calad covered his hands over his face.
Tommy was rubbing the boy's back, tears welling in his eyes. "Oh, Calad, I'm so sorry." Shoot, if someone had done that to one of his guitars, he'd definitely have to cut a bitch.
Adam reached out and pulled Calad towards him, holding him as he shook and wiped away a few of his own empathetic tears. Rubbing consolingly, he waited until Calad had calmed down before the asked, "When did this happen?"
Calad said shakily, "The day I got home from talking to you."
Adam knitted his dark eyebrows. "And you've been holding it in all this time?" He didn't understand how the boy could hide so many burdens...then again, living in a house full of people he wasn't even quite comfortable talking with, it must have been Calad's habit to sit still and suffocate. "Sweetie, I had no idea..."
Calad raised his head from Adam's shoulder, trying in vain to dry his face. As he continued, he forced his words out, trying desperately to maintain control. "I tried to feel better knowing that I was going to get to come here soon for the shoot. I wanted to see you and meet your band. I just forced myself to...not freak out after I found out it was gone. Then it just got harder and harder to keep from losing it.
"I just couldn't believe he didn't even ask me first. I have to believe he didn't do it just to..." Calad closed his eyes and shook his head. Then he said, "Maybe it couldn't have been fixed, but now I'll never know. After a while, I just couldn't take it anymore. The only thing I could think about was getting out of there." His voice became slightly strangled. "I didn't want to fuckin' dump all this on you, Adam! I came here to...I..."
"Shhh..." Adam said, pulling Calad back again to rest on his shoulder. "Take your time, man...it's okay," he whispered.
Somehow, Calad made himself a little calmer while being held, and he whispered, "I'm just so tired...and you're the only one I believe..."
"Believe what?" Adam asked when Calad paused.
Calad said, "When you say you care." The boy cried weakly as Adam held him close.
END OF CHAPTER 24